FAQ/Help |
Calendar |
Search |
Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,092
(SuperPoster!)
6 3,628 hugs
given |
#21
Quote:
Be prepared for him to change directions and to start begging and pleading for you not to divorce. Even though he said he wants a divorce. Abusers typically have trouble letting their victim go. Mine has tried to hold onto me with a tight grip... it's been a battle, in so many ways.. and I've made mistakes along the way through our separation and divorce process. I've slept with my ex, despite us going through a divorce. He is making all these promises, of change.. which is very common for abusers once you decide you're done and want to truly leave. They don't like being abandoned. And there is their battle. So, just be prepared for the unexpected. He may/may not fight you on this. If he's already secured another victim, then he may not. But, even with another victim lined up, abusers are still known to pursue. Feel free to PM me, if you want, because I've been through it all. I am happy to provide any support you may need. I know how hard it is.. it's an up and down and emotional process. But be resolute in your decision. That's the best advice I can give.. that will carry you through. Hugs and strength to you. __________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
|
Reply With Quote |
ArmorPlate108
|
Junior Member
Member Since Apr 2023
Location: in the south
Posts: 12
1 |
#22
Thank you RD Mercer for your encouraging words. I was afraid being labeled as a divorced woman. I was afraid that one day my children get married without a full set of parents by their sides. I was afraid that people would laugh at me for not be able to nurture a tiny family. I was afraid that I could not handle my fragile feelings. All in all, I have so much fear and doubts. Today and moving forward I will be strong and will have no fear to get through the end of a tunnel where the bright light will await for me. Thanks again.
|
Reply With Quote |
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,380
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,277 hugs
given |
#23
Quote:
Very high percentage of marriages end in divorce and it’s typically not because people couldn’t nurture their family. Well so your kids could still have a set of parents getting married. Parents just won’t be married to each other. You won’t stop being parents. Ideally all marriages will be happy and last forever. But if they are miserable and it’s abusive situation then it’s better it won’t last forever. Your children don’t need to witness abuse You can do it. You sound very strong |
|
Reply With Quote |
Junior Member
Member Since Apr 2023
Location: in the south
Posts: 12
1 |
#24
Thank you so much Divine1966! I have to be strong in order for me to move forward. I have lived in fear for too long and it is now or never. Thanks again for all the supports.
|
Reply With Quote |
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,118
(SuperPoster!)
13 21.3k hugs
given |
#25
@Elephantmangos please use caution moving forward if your choice is divorce. If a spouse is prone to rage and strike out it can get dangerous.
|
Reply With Quote |
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#26
In violent relationships its best to leave when he is not there. Then get a solicitor involved and only have contact through the solicitor
|
Reply With Quote |
Junior Member
Member Since Apr 2023
Location: in the south
Posts: 12
1 |
#27
note. thank you so much for your advice.
|
Reply With Quote |
Open Eyes
|
Reply |
|
Similar Threads | ||||
Thread | Forum | |||
How to help a guy who MAY be in an abusive relationship | Relationships & Communication | |||
Relationship Issue - Long Distance Relationship Breaking Up After 3.5 years | Relationships & Communication | |||
New and in an abusive relationship.... | Relationships & Communication | |||
Got Out of An Abusive Relationship; Now Live In An Abusive Home | Survivors of Abuse | |||
5 years in a relationship, 3 years since ending it. How come he hasn't moved on? | Relationships & Communication |