Where my dismissiveness comes from

Yes part of it comes from a guy using my past against me. But it's also because I get the stage three clingers that text me Yes part of it comes from a guy using my past against me. But it's also because I get the stage three clingers that text me everyday always talking about there mental health problems until I start getting anxious and sick myself. I just notice that I attract a lot of broken men and I just think to myself I'm not a rehab from broken men I know it's harsh but it's the type of men I keep attracting. I want so much better than me like a whole league better than me. The only problem is I don't know why I keep attracting these low energy types with no confidence is it that they are so desperate because I'm the first one to take notice of them or is it because I also somewhat can identify with there suffering? It's an interesting thought. always talking about there mental health problems until I start getting anxious and sick myself. I just notice that I attract a lot of broken men and I just think to myself I'm not a rehab from broken men I know it's harsh but it's the type of men I keep attracting. I want so much better than me like a whole league better than me. The only problem is I don't know why I keep attracting these low energy types with no confidence is it that they are so desperate because I'm the first one to take notice of them or is it because I also somewhat can identify with there suffering? It's an interesting thought.

It's very likely that subconsciously, you are picking up on their lack of confidence, that you are identifying with it. and are somehow attracted to these types yourself, on an unconscious level.

Let me ask you this: do you love yourself? Do you feel confident about who you are? Do you feel like you are broken yourself?

If you don't love yourself, feel confident, or if you think you're a broken person too, these are the same types of men you will energetically attract. The way to stop that pattern is to work on loving yourself first, increasing your self confidence, and changing your viewpoint on your history and story.

Yeah I keep telling myself that all that matters is my past mistakes made me a better person but there are people in my life that question the decisions I make.

I have a girlfriend who once told me that I make bad decisions. I thought about that for a long time and determined that while I've made plenty of mistakes by exercising poor judgement, or through impulsive decisions and risk-taking decisions, that it does NOT mean overall that I make "bad decisions". I had to correct her, years later.

You can't let other people's judgments or viewpoints control your view of yourself.

Everyone has made mistakes, and some of us, more than others. I've made SO many mistakes, but I don't let that effect how I love or view myself. To err is only human... the real key here is to learn and grow from mistakes, but not let those mistakes become a part of your identity.

Have you become a better or more mature person now as a result of those mistakes?

I have become more mature and more cautious as a result I don't give my heart so freely anymore.

What I realized is what when I meet a man whole time but the romance part was exaggerated because you've never had any man give you genuine advice or listen to your feelings. So basically your neglect messes up how you actually define relationships and friendships. Don't us people know that aye. Oh well. Men as friends are better anyway relationships are scary, you're trapped without a choice, I'd rather have my freedom. Friendship is a different type of love and people don't prioritize it because they think romantic relationships fix everything. They don't, you fix you nobody else can.