Why do the people that *DO* care show it in messed up ways?

I know S (roommate) cares, but when he sees my eating disorder controlling me he threatens me, polices me, humiliates me, restrains me, etc.

Just now I had completed a binge and was purging, annd he caught me and he literally irpped me away from the toilet and tackled me and said it was for my own good. I feel like there were better ways of handling that, liek, leave me be and talk about it in hte morning?

sorry for the typos shaking like a tweaker rn

What is really a better way MuddyBoots?

Like I said, leave me tf alone, if it bothers you LEAVE, and then talk about it in the AM

What I meant in my question to you is what can prevent you from binging and purging in the first place?

You need to talk to him when you are not doing an ED behavior, calmly. It is clear that he cares about you, he just proceeds about showing it in insensitive ways. You need to thank him but explain what you do not like about it.

Wow, that is so inappropriate! You need to set boundaries with him! He probably thinks he’s helping you. Tell him no, don’t do that. Talking is fine. That is not fine.

People who use control, humiliation, and physical or verbal violence "for your own good" aren't actually doing good. Must you live with him?

I did try to talk to him about it but we just ended up fighting. He doesn't understand why anyone would go days without food, finally eat, and then throw up. I don't either.

I don't have anywhere else to go right now, but I'm waiting back to hear from a few long-term residential and sober living places.

If you were slicing your wrists open with a knife, wouldn't you expect that anyone seeing that would take the knife away from you and get help for you?

Essentially what you were doing was self-harm, right? Do you expect him to just stand by and let you? And he knows you are in the process of trying to get help.

Your illness doesn't just affect you - it affects every person you live with.

well maybe people just shouldn't care about each other. My treatment team doesn't take purging as seriously as cutting, so why should S? Why does S eevn give a shyt what I do? We're not fking or anything like that. I would let him slice his wrists open if that's what he really wanted to do. Freedom.
Apparently I don't care about anybody and I don't want anybody to care about me. what's he gonna do next? Cut my fingers off? Tie me up after I eat? (ooh ) DIY tube me and cut me off from food so I don't binge?
He didn't even s tart with a "hey, stop, what're you doing" or anything like that.
And calling me a wuss for not eating when he wants doesn't help. Saying he's going to knock me out doesn't help. Bringing home loads of trigger foods because "binging is better than restricting" doesn't help. Watching me like a god damn hawk and making faces at what I eat and when I take my time and when I choose weird stuff doesn't help.
May;e I can understand the tackling if for some reason he has some sort of attachment (I certainly hate his fking guts and hope he feels the same and I better find a d ifferentplace to live soon but whatever) because it's a reaction but seriously there's a difference between taking the knife away and fking slamming the person into the floor.