Loneliness and travelling

Hello everyone
I am new here and lovely to meet you all.
I would like to raise a topic that has been annoying me since I was a child, loneliness. I have been very lonely as a child even, had very few friends which stayed with me only for maybe a year or two and then due to circumstances and life stages lost them . I have maybe during the pandemic was okay not having friends and enjoyed being a lonely wolf. But how healthy is that?

I do feel that whatever new friend I make after Covid, that friendship won’t last , I just feel they behave the wrong way for various reasons ( insult me usually) and they eventually ghost me. I know those are not healthy people and are very traumatised just like me and maybe that causes a lot of projections in the relationship.

I have some close friends and I am blessed for those one or two people that they can talk to me if I need to.

Think it’s impossible to meet new people after Covid however I don’t know what I must do. My work is solitary, I work from home and in the afternoon I will just go to the gym or the cinema. I have tried believe me, numerous times to invite people in my place and make dinner and in the end I feel like people just don’t want to talk or walk away( women, as I am a woman) . A male friend of mine is convinced they are jealous because I am very attractive to the other sex but I don’t want to believe that.

This loneliness made me feel so depressed that to battle my loneliness I adopted a puppy that I love so much and has covered that void somehow. I am also single. I am wondering if its me the problem because I am quite an introvert but I can also be cool and fun and loving. I always wanted to travel but what stopped me was doing that alone… now I have accepted that I might need to travel solo although its a bit of a challenge travelling to exotic destinations as I am a single young woman.
I am not sure what I must do . How can I meet other people with same interests and create some healthy friendships? Can this be done online ? Because in person it seems sooo difficult. Is it so difficult to make new friends on your 40ies?

Have you ever felt like this? Any advice would be really appreciated…thank you 🙏

I think this is the issue of our times. Very few ways to make good friends.

Not sure why you think it will be solved with travel. Whenever I travel I meet no one.

Personally I feel like the best way to meet new people is to have like shared struggle. So for me that is some sort of working situation. So people have to show up... they have to do things they aren't thrilled about and I think that bonds people.

I find that volunteering isn't that great because they can just not show up and they don't have any complaining to do so they might not talk to you.

You mentioned the puppy. I find people go wild with puppys. Go for a walk or something in a dog park I am sure people will come to you.

There are travel groups. I know single women who travel with those. I’d look them up in your area.

I think it’s a good idea to join some groups too. Meet up or other groups. Or take a class? Book club? Hobby group? Yea you can find those online and if you find local ones, join them. What do you like to do?

Perhaps working from home isn’t a good set up and most companies don’t do 100% from home but more like a combination. I’d look into possibly working somewhere where you could talk to people

I don’t believe people are jealous. That might be true in high school. Most adults don’t care who is attractive to the opposite sex as it’s nothing to with their own happiness. Looks are subjective and don’t guarantee happiness so no one is jealous of looks in their 40s, unless perhaps we are talking about extremely shallow people

Cooking dinner and inviting people over is ok but if you aren’t close friends, it might be too personal. Why not asking people to join an activity?

Just based on what I read, it almost seems like you might be forcing the issue. What I mean by that is it is almost like you're in a rush to have companionship and are willing to try several things to make that happen. Just live your life on your terms and let what's going to happen, happen.

You're an introvert and that is a good thing. Just do the "normal" things, go shopping, walk the dog, catch a movie, etc. If / when the time is right, the companionship you're seeking will fall into place in my opinion. You state you have one or two close friends. Believe me, you're blessed. I am a firm believer in keeping my "circle" small. I'm a quality vs. quantity-type person.

There's a huge difference between being lonely and being alone. Just be sure you know which is which. The important thing is your happiness.

I reckon there would be online friendship groups that you could definitely find! I’m unable to recommend any because we don’t live in the same country but there are friendship connect apps with no strings attached here in Australia so I guess there would be too where you are from.

Are there any local facebook groups you can connect up with?