Reflecting on friendships and self love

I'm just thinking that soon will be valentines day and my wound is not about being single but the struggle I've had to have friends that I have had a lot of fake friends that I probably should have cut off because they talked **** to me to my sister. I think I am too nice and my mum is right that I let the public **** on me but when it's for her I give it back. I've had a lot of betrayal with friendships I am not friends with anyone I went to highschool with my experience I wouldn't wish on anyone. I had to go through a lot of betrayal and torment and just being excluded in general that it has caused me to become reclusive and I just feel more wounded and apprehensive of everyone. I don't truly feel like anyone is a friend and to be honest, I've not wanted to get close to anyone for a very long time. So for valentines day I wish for one thing only and that's that I can heal and just not get so sensitive that I haven't found my people. If I m being honest I don't feel like I have my own people I felt like friendship is hard like why would I think getting a boyfriend is easy. I just don't want to hurt anymore I feel like I attach myself more to people more than they do to me and I'm just sick of being the one that cares more. For once I want someone that cares for me the same intensity that I do I deserve that.

This article is from Australia and you might find the site, itself, to be interesting: https://au.reachout.com/articles/wha...-a-good-friend

I think it's important to know that friendship and mutual care and respect ought to be just that : "mutual" and "reciprocial".

Put energy into your passions, whether that's gardening, playing a musical instrusment, painting, running, swimming, etc. And practice self-care.

One of the best Valenitine's days I ever have was when I got dressed up, put of makeup, and went to the museum to see some wonderful art. I didn't have much money, and the museum was free, but I did manage to buy myself a red rose. I felt really fulfilled and proud of myself that day.

So, I hope you can give yourself a super dose of self-care...