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DeeeSchmeee68
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Default Apr 22, 2024 at 09:33 AM
  #1
(This might be long)
I've met a new neighbor who has been trying to become my friend. She's 59, recently divorced, and drinks/goes out quite frequently. She asked me 3 separate times if I like country music. On the third time, I got a little aggravated and said, "You've already asked me this, and I've already told you. No."
She also said I need to go to the parties at the doctor's house that she knows. She said I need to bring my bikini because they do titty shots. I said OMG!! I'm not 20 anymore!!!
I met her friend L, and she and I have connected better.

L and I were out one night early. Neighbor was meeting us and showed up 2 hours later. The first thing she says is, "Wow, dead in here."
I say, "Were here!".
We go to another bar (I should add I don't drink, maybe once every few months) and as we are walking to the bathroom neighbor starts sounding upset and I hear from the stall, what the ****s the matter with you? You can't even ****ing say hello? (she keeps trying to set L up with different guys she doesn't like)
To which I say, " Is there going to be a fight out there?"
When I come out there both quiet.
Later L says she's leaving, we don't like staying out late.
A few minutes later I say I'm leaving to which neighbor sounds pissed off and says "Oh you're leaving too now!" And turns her back on me!!!

Days later she texts us both as if nothing happened. When she asks where we're going she says, Oh was I not invited? I said I didn't think you liked this music, plus you were so angry last weekend. And she acted like she didn't know what I was talking about
Then she texts me alone, explaining how L complains about her life all the time but won't do anything to change it.

I said maybe she just needs you to listen so she can vent. It's her life, her choices.

I really don't want to be friends with this woman

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Default Apr 23, 2024 at 12:06 AM
  #2
Hey Dee, its an interesting situation. It doesn't sound like there is enough common ground (interests, attitude, etc) for you guys to be friends, but if she is a neighbor that's awkward, especially as she doesn't sound like she picks up on social queues very well. The only thing I can think of you have kind of already done - which is to say you are ok with doing things together occasionally but you don't feel like you have a lot in common. However I get the feeling she will choose to ignore all or some of that message. I feel for you, its a tricky situation.
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Default Apr 23, 2024 at 06:26 AM
  #3
Thank you for your reply.

I think you're right. It's tricky for sure. I'm going to keep my distance as best I can.

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Default Apr 23, 2024 at 10:29 AM
  #4
Just because someone wants to be friends with you doesn't mean you have to be friends. I would stay as far away from her as possible & if the other lady doesn't want to I would probably stay awsy from them both. That is just how I work when I don't like being around someone. I no longer waste my time tolerating people I don't like to be with

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Default Apr 23, 2024 at 01:22 PM
  #5
Very good points made.

I can be neighborly but not spend time with her

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Default Apr 23, 2024 at 02:20 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DeeeSchmeee68 View Post
Very good points made.

I can be neighborly but not spend time with her

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Yes, exactly. I am a good neighbor to my new neighbors. We do lots of things for each other but I very seldom socialize with them because I don't enjoy the kind of socializing with large groups like they enjoy. We all have our own kind of life we enjoy & just because we are neighbors doesn't equal close friends

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