[DeeeSchmeee68]

My kids are all adults and highly dysfunctional.
I realize they all have their own lives, but none of them seem interested in strengthening our family bond.
I feel left out and forgotten.
I don't know how to bring us back together.

I don't know what to do and I am so sad

Sent from my SM-A146U using Tapatalk

[CANDC]

@DeeeSchmeee68 it is sad when we are so close to our kids as we parent them. Then just when we feel like we succeeded to raise them, they go off on their own. It is sometimes called the "empty nest" syndrome when the kids have flown the coop and are on their own. My daughter moved 1500 miles away so there was no chance to try to bring the family back together.

It is not easy. When I went through that I had to look at my ideas about who I was. I was no longer the parent figure. I had to invent a new identity. I had to start new activities that I never had time for when I was parenting.

CANDC

[If you want me to see your reply to this post please include @CANDC in your message - not in requoting my message]

[DeeeSchmeee68]

@CANDC you make some good points.

Just a hard pill to swallow when other families are so close

Sent from my SM-A146U using Tapatalk

[CANDC]

@DeeeSchmeee68 they look close when they get together but under the surface there can be many problems. The grass is always greener in the other person's yard.

[VabGirl]

I wish you well. Dont stress about coming back together.

[DeeeSchmeee68]

I appreciate the support. It helps to know I'm not alone 🩵

Sent from my SM-A146U using Tapatalk

[Ninetiesgrl13]

I have one adult dysfunctional child that chooses to not have a relationship with me. He would rather make money then ever spend time with family. It used to break my heart, but I try to not think about it anymore. If he’s ever ready for a relationship, he can reach out to me. I hope you at least have some good memories you can hold on to. ♥️

[eskielover]

I will say as a child I really loved getting away from family & visiting my grandparents half way across the country. At the end of 3 months there I wasn't happy to go home but I was also glad to get away from their dysfunction too. My parents were clueless that their own dysfunction was what drove me away from them & probably into my own dysfunction trying to compensate for what I grew up around. We always see others as the dysfunctional ones while not clearly seeing it in ourselves too

[SquarePegGuy]

Originally Posted by DeeeSchmeee68

@CANDC you make some good points.

Just a hard pill to swallow when other families are so close

It can seem like other families are close, or they're more successful, or they take a vacation every year, or they have no money problems. Then there's my wife and me. We haven't had a vacation for over 15 years. We don't spend money to fix the house -- if I can't fix it, then it stays broken. We all have some health issue and mental disorder. But we don't know the details of those we believe have idyllic lives. We hear only the good news. As @CANDC wrote, "The grass is always greener in the other person's yard."