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Member
Member Since Dec 2022
Location: New York State
Posts: 311
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Jun 12, 2024 at 09:07 AM
#1
My kids are all adults and highly dysfunctional.
I realize they all have their own lives, but none of them seem interested in strengthening our family bond. I feel left out and forgotten. I don't know how to bring us back together. I don't know what to do and I am so sad Sent from my SM-A146U using Tapatalk |
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 CANDC, mote.of.soul, Ninetiesgrl13
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Super Moderator
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Member Since May 2014
Location: Northeast USA New England
Posts: 17,549
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Jun 12, 2024 at 11:28 AM
#2
@DeeeSchmeee68 it is sad when we are so close to our kids as we parent them. Then just when we feel like we succeeded to raise them, they go off on their own. It is sometimes called the "empty nest" syndrome when the kids have flown the coop and are on their own. My daughter moved 1500 miles away so there was no chance to try to bring the family back together.
It is not easy. When I went through that I had to look at my ideas about who I was. I was no longer the parent figure. I had to invent a new identity. I had to start new activities that I never had time for when I was parenting. CANDC [If you want me to see your reply to this post please include @CANDC in your message - not in requoting my message] __________________ Super Moderator Community Support Team "Things Take Time" |
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 eskielover
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Member Since Dec 2022
Location: New York State
Posts: 311
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Jun 12, 2024 at 12:57 PM
#3
@CANDC you make some good points.
Just a hard pill to swallow when other families are so close  Sent from my SM-A146U using Tapatalk |
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| CANDC
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Super Moderator
Community Support Team Community Liaison
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Member Since May 2014
Location: Northeast USA New England
Posts: 17,549
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Jun 12, 2024 at 02:15 PM
#4
@DeeeSchmeee68 they look close when they get together but under the surface there can be many problems. The grass is always greener in the other person's yard.
__________________ Super Moderator Community Support Team "Things Take Time" |
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DeeeSchmeee68, eskielover
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Member Since Jul 2021
Location: virginia
Posts: 292
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Jun 12, 2024 at 05:51 PM
#5
I wish you well. Dont stress about coming back together.
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DeeeSchmeee68
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Member
Member Since Dec 2022
Location: New York State
Posts: 311
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Jun 13, 2024 at 06:41 AM
#6
I appreciate the support. It helps to know I'm not alone 🩵
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Member
Member Since Jun 2024
Location: The Doldrums
Posts: 34
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Jun 13, 2024 at 10:42 AM
#7
I have one adult dysfunctional child that chooses to not have a relationship with me. He would rather make money then ever spend time with family. It used to break my heart, but I try to not think about it anymore. If he’s ever ready for a relationship, he can reach out to me. I hope you at least have some good memories you can hold on to. ♥️
__________________ ‘I have been one acquainted with the night. I have walked out in rain—and back in rain. I have outwalked the furthest city light.’ ~Robert Frost~ |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: Kentucky, USA
Posts: 24,834
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Jun 13, 2024 at 11:49 AM
#8
I will say as a child I really loved getting away from family & visiting my grandparents half way across the country. At the end of 3 months there I wasn't happy to go home but I was also glad to get away from their dysfunction too. My parents were clueless that their own dysfunction was what drove me away from them & probably into my own dysfunction trying to compensate for what I grew up around. We always see others as the dysfunctional ones while not clearly seeing it in ourselves too
__________________  Leo's favorite place was in the passenger seat of my truck. We went everywhere together like this. Leo my soulmate will live in my heart FOREVER Nov 1, 2002 - Dec 16, 2018 |
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Veteran Member
Member Since Mar 2020
Location: Northeastern USA
Posts: 509
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Jun 13, 2024 at 10:25 PM
#9
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__________________ Major Depressive Disorder; Sleep Apnea; possibly on the spectrum Nuvigil 50mg; Effexor 37.5mg; meds for blood pressure & cholesterol |
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