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Member
Member Since May 2008
Location: Florida
Posts: 77
16 |
#1
I've got a problem with intimacy. Maybe it's not directly connected with intimacy, but it is something that my wife and i struggle with.
we even have a difficult time talking about it-the "it" being my inability to bring her pleasure. she doesn't have a problem pleasuring me.I don't have a problem receiving the pleasure, but I can't seem to be able to offer her the same. It's confusing. She says I'm a loving person in every other way, but need to bring her my love from the heart. i thought i was doing that. instead, tonight she's in bed upset and I'm left wondering what i can do to please her. we both struggle with anxiety and take meds for it. I'm now second guessing myself and what i mean to her (and her to me.) Worn out and tired tonight. |
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: Ga
Posts: 13,936
20 34 hugs
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#2
hon you are not alone! I think most couples stuggle with intimacy. maybe us women feel differently about the meaning of it. to me it is the sharing, light gentle touches. being intimate does not always mean sex. for me it is the emotional connection.
__________________ He who angers you controls you! |
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Pandita-in-training
Member Since Sep 2006
Location: Maryland
Posts: 27,289
(SuperPoster!)
18 550 hugs
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#3
Bebop has some good hints. My husband and I do a lot of hugging and have little "rituals" that let each of us know we're thinking about the other. When I stand on a single step, I'm just the right height to fit into my husband's arms nice so we both look for single steps, LOL. At night, I insist my husband pat me on the bottom like a little kid before I go to bed (I usually go to bed before he does) but it's just a fun pat, makes me feel cared for. He does a lot of telling me how much he appreciates me, thanks me for chores I do for us/dinner I make, etc. and I'm constantly looking for little ways to please him, surprises and things I think he'll like. We have our own jokes and things we see and discuss together, shared memories.
__________________ "Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Feb 2008
Location: SC
Posts: 4,083
16 |
#4
</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Perna said: We have our own jokes and things we see and discuss together, shared memories. </div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> Like two faucets and one spout Perna...finding the right mix for the perfect warm water... You sound like you have found the intimacy we all so seek...Good for you two...bath in it... Lenny __________________ I have only one conclusion,,and that is things change too quickly for me to draw them.... Sobriety date...Halloween 1989. I was plucked from hell...and treat this gift as if it is the only one... |
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