[prettyjolie]

I haven't even been married a year yet, and already I miss my family so much. My husband's in the military so he got stationed 2,000 miles away from Florida lol and I haven't seen my family in 7 months.
I am very close to my family and I depend on them very much, like they depend on me. And being so far away, I can't help but feel guilty for leaving them. I feel bad because I know it's hard on them because they know that my husband and I are here alone, and they worry. I also feel bad because I've always been there for them.. When something needed to be done.. like a TV being set up, a dish being set up, and even going to doctor's appointment with them. I know they're adults but we aren't from US so they don't really know how a lot of things work. I feel like I should be at home, helping them.
I miss my parents sooo much. I feel bad that I moved out when I was 18 (though I did it because I was depressed and my mom's psychological problems were making mine worse). I know I hurt them a lot and now I feel really guilty. I feel like I wasn't thankful for everything that they did for me and now I've abandoned them.
They never make me feel bad or anything like that &they love my husband.
Sometimes I just want to go back to being a little kid and to never be away from my parents. Is that pathetic or what?

My husband has problems understanding why I'm sad sometimes.. he's not close to his family. He sometimes goes weeks without calling his siblings.. I talk to my family nearly every day! He feels like he's not good enough to keep me happy. So now I have to keep my feeling bottled up because I don't want to make him feel bad.
How do I get over this? It's so hard to think that I will lose them one day.. and it makes me feel like maybe I shouldn't be here, and I should go home and spend time with them before they die..
Am I immature?
What can I do to feel better about the distance.. it's nearly impossible for us to visit each other.
It makes me so sad when I think about the good times we had together and that we will never be able to share times like that.

[robin620]

Someone once said "Happiness is a close, tight-knit family in a distant city." Sounds like that's what you have, all except for the happiness part.

I can relate. A few years ago I left my parents, siblings and their offspring to move to Alaska. When I ran out of money there, I moved back to the Lower 48, but still a thousand miles away from my family. Then last year I got married and moved even further away from them. We can't afford to visit often and they have reasons not to visit us out here. My husband is also not very close to most of his family even though some of them live in the same area.

How to handle it, that's a difficult question. For me it was lots of e-mails and phone calls back home. When pictures are taken for school or snaps of family events they are usually sent to me in one form or another. There are still times I wish I was there for birthday parties and things like that, but I have my own life as well.

I also would suggest trying to make new friends where you are. Being a teacher, I have my co-workers to chat with about things. At each school I've been to there's one person who knows most of what I'm going through. Always someone sypathetic and willing to just listen unless I ask for advice.

When I was by myself, before I got married, I did a lot of wandering as well. Some of it was exploring around the new city, some of it was hiking and stuff like that but that could be just my love of nature that calmed me in those situations.

You might look around for groups that share some of your common interests. In Alaska there was a group of ladies who got together most Mondays for quilting. I don't quilt but many a Monday I took my other craft stuff over to work on and chat with the ladies. Another place to look is with those who share your spiritual journey. Actually any interest you have there could be a group or at least a person to get in contact with.

Then there's the step you have already taken, look to the web. I met my husband on a website and have found many friends on sites like this one. You have to be careful with that, but it is a way to meet people to vent to if you like to type your ventings and have time to chat.