[lizlemon]

Ok, it has been a long time since I posted here.
I am still seeing the same T. Things are really good. I have had several breakthroughs with some of my issues and we have gotten over some of the problems I was having with my lust for him but now he wants me to come 3 times a week up from twice and he feels that I should start lying on the couch to have my sessions. Up to this point I have always just sat in a comfy chair across from him and I swore that I would never ever lie down on a couch and talk to him during my sessions. He feels that this would allow me to free my thoughts even more. I sometimes find myself getting shy when we sit across from each other and I clam up, so by lying down, with him behind me he feels that this would provide a better enviroment for me to express my thoughts and feeling even more. I feel so gross about lying down but I want to have my sessions progress so I get what he is trying to achieve.
Am I the only one who has ever felt bizarre about this? He knows how I feel and he said that we would talk about it completely before I did lie down but I have such creepy associations to lying on a therapists couch. Maybe too many movies or books I have read about patients lying down and their doctors attacking them. Maybe I feel this way because I do want him to come on to me and this feels just too much like an akward senario. Anybody out there ever felt this way? By the way, he has remained completley professional during all of my lustful thoughts and outbursts and has stuck by me through it all.

[jexa]

You're definitely not the only one who feels this way. There is not a chance in hell that I would lay down on a couch in front of someone and speak my mind. I would be SO scared. Not sure exactly why, but I think it's just a very vulnerable position to be in.

[WikidPissah]

no way I could lay on the couch. would totally freak me out.

As far as I know, my T doesn't ask people to lie on the couch.

BUT - I actually do lie on the couch a lot! But I don't lie on my back with him behind me, in a formal "analysis" way. I tend to curl up with a pillow or whatever, still right across from him and facing him. Or I lay on my back with my head in the middle of the couch with my feet up on the arm of the couch. I feel super safe with T, but I am very fidgety, so I am all over the place in there.

I wonder if it would feel safer/better if it was YOUR idea? I think if my T had asked me to lie on the couch I absolutely never ever ever would have done it. It would have felt so icky to me.

Would it feel better if you just kind of tucked away the idea of lying down, and did it when it felt right to YOU? I do a lot better with everything in therapy when I feel like I'm the one who has control.

[BlackCanary]

no couches in my HMO -
BUT
I'd never lie full out on a couch for therapy, not at this point.

Still, I say you counter his suggestion by offering an alternative
- still sit in the comfy chair, but perhaps with the chair turned by 15 degrees so that you are not face on
- maybe less face to face but more side to side?

Be very clear - I'm not comfortable lying on the couch and I'm not going to do it now. If you do not want to, then do not.

[Perna]

I would trust myself and lie down, give it a try. All you have now is your imagination and, as you say, books/movies, etc. Go one step further and imagine if your T were to step out of character and "attack" you while you lie there. You have to make it realistic though; why could you not scream or jump up and be very angry and leave immediately with a parting, "I will be reporting this!"?

We can imagine anything we want; why imagine it not working/being scary? You say you see what he's saying/why he is suggesting it and that you want to move forward so why not give it a try, imagining it working?

[geez]

If you trust your T and you discuss it ahead of time and then you feel comfortable to then try it - go ahead.

I myself could not as it would be a vulnerable position for me.... we'll maybe I would if I ever got comfortable enough. I have a woman T and would be very uncomfortable trying laying down. If I had a male T then I probably wouldn't lay down on the couch ( I picked a woman T because I would be uncomfortable being in the presence of a male T talking about my issues).

Not sure my answer is helpful however I hope you find your answer and wishing you peace.

[sharon123]

I tried it once, and hated it. It gave me a feeling of not being in control. We all need to feel in control. It is YOUR therapy, and you shouldn't do something that make syou feel uncomfortable.

[sugahorse1]

I think I'd feel vulnerable...
But i sometimes think i could open up a bit more if I didn;t have to look at T (And this is purely from an emotional point of view, there is no lust or anything).
Having T behind me may making talking easier...
But not lying down for me, - too open and vulnerable (But at the same time this could provoke some real emotions for a change!)

[lizlemon]

Thanks everyone for your feedback. Much appreciated. Lying down won't start until the Fall when he gets back from holidays...if I decide to do it. Thanks again!

[Paraclete]

Hmm, mine used to get me to lie on a mattress on his floor, and he would sit beside me, sometimes holding my hand or putting his hands on me. He even referred to it accidentally once as the 'bed' ...

And he knew how badly I wanted and lusted after him. Creepy? No, exciting yes very. Conducive to good therapy? Not at all!