[Laci1234]

I am just curious if anyone sensed their T was going to end the relationship suddenly and what were the reasons you were given. Also what were the signs you felt before it ended?

My T has gotten really strange. I think he is having serious counter transference issues. I had posted in a previous post regarding these and despite his weird and very odd behaviour to me in our 2 last sessions, I was going to bring it up to him this Friday at our next session. I would post the link to my other post, but am too new a member yet!

My issue was when he was acting as a normal T, he responded to my emails within a day or two maximum. Well the last email (4 days before our last session) he never responded to and I asked him why and he said he thought we were seeing each other anyways (at the session in 4 days) and he did not need to. Then I sent an email last night as he needs to book my next month of appt's (we do this) and he has not responded to that one now either.

For details about his counter transference issues (which IMHO are only beliefs and think he is having) to understand the whole story. If he keeps acting like this I am going to have to cut him loose I guess but he was a really great doctor up until these last 2 sessions and was always good with emails, etc. Not that i emailed alot...just for changes in appt's, etc. But now he has become really strange in his behaviour with me. Like I said, see my previous post for the whole story but what were the signs you thought T ended your relationship?

I just worry he may end it this Friday at our next session due to his weird behaviour towards me and maybe he does not know how to deal with it??

[nicoleflynn]

The client is the one who is supposed to end therapy. If the t isn't comfortable for whatever reason, they should discuss it with you and give you 2-3 week heads-up to process.

Abandonment of a client is considered unethical.

[critterlady]

If you've been seeing this T for a while, I wouldn't give it up because of some oddness in the last couple of sessions. Bring it up with him - there could be a completely different reason than you suspect.

If this is the beginning of a rupture, it's probably well worth your while to work it out. The relationship only gets stronger when you work through something like that together.

My first T dumped me out of nowhere one night, and I didn't see it coming at ALL. I thought things were going well... she acted totally normal right up until the words "I'm done" came out of her mouth. Coulda knocked me over with a feather. I still dont know what happened.

[Laci1234]

Thanks for the insight. I must have been being paranoid as T emailed me today (usually he emails after a day so this time it was two days and it freaked me out a little....). He said he has booked me some more sessions and when we meet Friday we can review the chosen dates. So it seems to me he is still onboard...maybe I was just having my abandonment issues from the past intrude.

[mommyof2girls]

Yes I did sense then ending with my ex T ..... I knew that I had to make that decision, as I was more interested in getting to know him personally then working on my own issues with my life..... I had to have my hair just right, my make up look perfect and and just so fascianted by him, that it was blocking my ability to focus on myself.... I do still miss him and think of him often as well......

[rolan86]

I always was afraid to bring up subjects like sex with T. As a male (in college), there were of course things I wanted to talk about, such as masturbation, porn, sexual frustration, things like that. I was always too afraid to bring these matters up with T, as I was so afraid that she might get so turned off and uncomfortable that she would drop me. I was afraid of her labeling me as a pervert, when these were actually things I just wanted to discuss, as a serious matter. When I think about it, it shouldn't matter what I thought or what I say. She agreed to give therapy to a male, so she should be prepared for dealing with male issues. I was just so afraid of her thinking of me as some perverted creep and just dropping me for that reason...

[rolan86]

I didn't want her to think I was sexist.

[marphtwo]

I have been feeling like it is either time for her or me to terminate. I am not sure about it really. I think it is coming because I am not going to sessions for any problems and we usually end up chatting by accident, until she tries to move the conversation back to me and my feelings or something. So I think its coming, especially since Ic ame out to her that I have feelings for her. She has some too, but is being very professional about it.

[marphtwo]

Originally Posted by Laci1234

I am just curious if anyone sensed their T was going to end the relationship suddenly and what were the reasons you were given. Also what were the signs you felt before it ended?

My T has gotten really strange. I think he is having serious counter transference issues,...?

I am in a similar situations and I am having mixed feelings about it. I have told my T about my feelings for her, and then we discussed boundaries and how it cant happen right now. She also expressed very subtle but amazing responses that have made me ecstatic. so basically I want to terminate so we can explore the possibilities, but I also dont want to lose such a great therapist. It would take quite a while to replace her and it could be all for naught; our outside relationship may not be successful. Seems like a huge gamble and I dont know what is about to happen next.