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New Member
Member Since Jul 2021
Location: Brazil
Posts: 6
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#1
I'm going to be straight to the point: I'm a lesbian who's incredibly attracted to my therapist, and I haven't disclosed this to her yet. It didn't bother me.
Last session I took a few pills of Phenibut to make me more talkative for the second time, and I think it had something to do with my reaction. For the last 20 minutes of the session, we were very physically close and almost touching. I asked to see her hand, she showed me her arms, and I traced the spots on her skin from afar, and commented on them. I said she was skinny and she said "Not that much" and laughed, I said she was very pale and asked if her surname was hers or her husband's, she said it was hers and then started caressing her own skin while I did the same and said her spots formed a constellation, she was smiling and blushing. Then she asked me to show her my arms and I denied out of shyness. Problem is, at this point I was CRAVING her. I had never felt this attracted to someone in my life. And Phenibut is, apparently, known to make women wet. I was so wet it showed through my pants. I don't know if she noticed it, but I think she did. Some of my therapist friends thought this interaction was absurd, others commended her for being warm towards me since I have severe intimacy issues - don't like being touched, etc. I don't know if I should tell her about my reaction. How do you ask someone if they noticed your arousal without it being awkward?! And I'm afraid it'll make her uncomfortable. She has told me a patient has never confessed themselves to her, so I'm not sure if she knows how to deal with it. Last edited by bluekoi; Jul 07, 2021 at 11:04 AM.. Reason: Add trigger icon. |
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LonesomeTonight
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Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2019
Location: Earth
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#2
What do you hope to gain from telling her? What you describe rings alarm bells and you need to tread carefully here. Attraction often emerges in therapy and it can be useful to talk about, but both parties need to be clear on where the boundaries lie so the feelings can be discussed openly without exploitation. If you want to tell her as a way to understand and work with these feelings and where they're coming from it might be useful, but acting them out in the relationship isn't ethical. My suggestion is to be honest with yourself about why you want to tell her about your feelings and reactions. If it's because deep down you're hoping she might feel an attraction to you, that's definitely a sign to slow down and consider what you're in therapy for. If your therapist shows any signs of attraction to you that's a definite indication you need to find a different therapist who keeps ethical boundaries. And self-responsibility is a factor here too in knowing what brings this reaction on and how to prevent it disrupting your therapy work.
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ArtieTheSequal, LonesomeTonight, RoxanneToto, weaverbeaver
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New Member
Member Since Jul 2021
Location: Brazil
Posts: 6
2 |
#3
Quote:
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LonesomeTonight
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Magnate
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: Underground
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#4
It sounds like you're there (or here) to play games, not do therapy.
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divine1966
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Aug 2020
Location: England
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#5
If it were me, I’d think about finding a therapist of the opposite sex so there would be less/no chance of me experiencing attraction. I chose a same sex counsellor (I'm straight) precisely because I was afraid of something like this happening to me. I could deal with other forms of transference etc, but not this.
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
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#6
It went through your pants??? She asked you to see your arms?? She hid behind the pillow??? Like what what???
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New Member
Member Since Jul 2021
Location: Brazil
Posts: 6
2 |
#7
Quote:
This is why I chose to tell her about my reaction, I do feel like by not telling her directly I could lead her into sensual situations that she wouldn't "allow" if she knew I was having this attraction. Unfortunately, we never delved into this subject again and didn't really work through it in the "now". My attraction to her is slowly fading away which is good I guess. I know how these all sound, and I actually had a couple more weird/sensual moments after it that I don't know how to process, but I won't be sharing them here because I sensed a tone of judgement from your comment and another one above, and I came here for support, not that. I know I should discuss these things with her directly but I feel like talking about them online helps me sort out what to focus on - I'm not here to play games with people I don't know. |
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New Member
Member Since Jul 2021
Location: Brazil
Posts: 6
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#8
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,376
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#9
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