[supernova001]

I have bipolar disorder. I just went through 5 months of severe suicidal depression. Ended up being hospitalized twice. During this recent hospital stay which was a month ago, they found a medication that seemed to have really worked. I've been stable for the past month, but 2 days ago the depression crept back. I'm so scared of having to go through this again. I don't have it in me to fight. Clinical depression is so very painful and i don't want to put my family through this again...all the worrying etc. I just need god's mercy, support and protection. I can't go through it again. I'm scared i'll end up suicidal again.

[Travelinglady]

I'm so sorry. I, too, know what depression is like and what it's like to be hospitalized. I'll pray. I do think, though, that you should get in touch with your doctor, also, so we hope your depression won't get too deep. I also pray for doctors.....

[Leed]

Hi supernova -- I have clinical depression too, and I've found that when the depression starts creeping back, that I either need an increase in dosage, or else the doc needs to change my medication. One or the other. But something HAS to be done, and soon. If he doesn't want to increase, then perhaps you've become accommodated to the medication. That means you've become "used" to it and it's not effective anymore. That happens to all of us sooner or later.

So talk to your doctor soon. Okay? Hugs, Lee

[spondiferous]

Hi supernova...just caught this thread now. It's been almost a week...hope things are looking up. I'll keep you in my prayers.

[avlady]

Supernova, depression is an awful feeling, you probabaly need a med change or increase.

[anneo59]

Originally Posted by supernova001

I have bipolar disorder. I just went through 5 months of severe suicidal depression. Ended up being hospitalized twice. During this recent hospital stay which was a month ago, they found a medication that seemed to have really worked. I've been stable for the past month, but 2 days ago the depression crept back. I'm so scared of having to go through this again. I don't have it in me to fight. Clinical depression is so very painful and i don't want to put my family through this again...all the worrying etc. I just need god's mercy, support and protection. I can't go through it again. I'm scared i'll end up suicidal again.

Hello Supernova, Please hang in there! I'm sorry you are going thru this, and I certainly have been there myself. I'm glad you are reaching out! You are definitely in my prayers!

[Piraeus]

Hi Supernova. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

[Fuzzybear]

[gloobylube]

Hi supernova, I am new to forum today, but wanted to offer up thoughts and prayers to you.
I have a family history of Bipolar, depression,anxiety disorders, which I experience myself, and know how disabling the depression can be, fortunately I have been hospitalized, and hope to keep it that way, as i have a 13 year old daughter to care for.
But do know many of us out here completely know how you feel, and are pulling for you, to come out of this depression.
I too agree, time or med increase, or additional help as well.
Hang in there we are here for you

[relangston]

Originally Posted by supernova001

I have bipolar disorder. I just went through 5 months of severe suicidal depression. Ended up being hospitalized twice. During this recent hospital stay which was a month ago, they found a medication that seemed to have really worked. I've been stable for the past month, but 2 days ago the depression crept back. I'm so scared of having to go through this again. I don't have it in me to fight. Clinical depression is so very painful and i don't want to put my family through this again...all the worrying etc. I just need god's mercy, support and protection. I can't go through it again. I'm scared i'll end up suicidal again.

Supernova I know that you may feel that you do not have anymore fight in you but your feeling are lying to you. We were created for the fight. If I may offer a different path. Try focusing on the outcome that you want rather than the circumstances that you are in. I know that you hurt inside and and your mind is raging but a little each day just say to your self that happiness is where I am going and I will achieve it. Get some paper and just keep writing it down. In times that you are under attack scream at the top of your lungs that I will have victory. Even if you dont feel it right now your feeling will catch up. You have a warrior inside you. Let her out. I am praying for you and if I can help in any way just let me know. God Bless.

[Tjve]

Originally Posted by supernova001

I have bipolar disorder. I just went through 5 months of severe suicidal depression. Ended up being hospitalized twice. During this recent hospital stay which was a month ago, they found a medication that seemed to have really worked. I've been stable for the past month, but 2 days ago the depression crept back. I'm so scared of having to go through this again. I don't have it in me to fight. Clinical depression is so very painful and i don't want to put my family through this again...all the worrying etc. I just need god's mercy, support and protection. I can't go through it again. I'm scared i'll end up suicidal again.

Head up and be strong...my thoughts are with you.