I am really struggling right now with many things. I think if I were to die right now I would be in hell and that scares me. I believe that Jesus died on the cross for our sins, and that if we believe in him we will be saved. I have been saved at least I thought. I have done so many wrongs and can't comprihend how he just forgives me. I don't feel connect and want that connection sooooo bad. I have joined a bible study and go to church at least every other week with my neighbor. (Would be every week but have transportation issues)

[Ryan]

Friend, i have felt your pain. Forgiveness is a VERY tricky subject because it tends to contradict everything we, as humans, can understand about unconditional love.

I say I have/do feel your pain because I am currently teaching a Bible study on the topic of grace and forgiveness. We are working through a book called Whats So Amazing About Grace (by Phillip Yancy). It's a phenominal book that dives into the understanding of why we are so valuable to the Lord.

We tend to place a value on things because of the world we live in. If you want a movie, you have to pay a price. If you want a paycheck, you have to earn it. The hardest thing, as Christians, to understand is that our sins carry a price so high that God himself had to pay it for us... enter Jesus.

I want you to think about something... when you accept Jesus into your heart and soul and strive to live by His teachings, you ARE SAVED. I also want you to think about this... because you are saved, you can never earn the amazing gift you have been given... nor will you ever get what you truely deserve as a sinner.

I know it's hard to comprehend, but if you can get your hands on a copy of that book, it offers a better explanation than I can give.

As far as the connection goes, you're on the right track. Take your time with it. Continue to work toward complete submission to God and His will for you. In time, you will begin to feel more connected.

I hope something I sand has helped. May God bless you with His peace, love, and Grace.

[bebop]

very simple. Prayer!

[Shyguy88]

"I am really struggling right now with many things. I think if I were to die right now I would be in hell and that scares me. I believe that Jesus died on the cross for our sins, and that if we believe in him we will be saved. I have been saved at least I thought. I have done so many wrongs and can't comprihend how he just forgives me. I don't feel connect and want that connection sooooo bad."

-Twirls, I know exactly how you feel, I feel the same way a lot, I went to church all my life, ever since my earliest memories when I was a young kid, I always beleived in God my whole life, but I always have that doubt if I were to die I would go to hell..I still continue going to church every Sunday and wednesday, I also pray to God to forgive my sins, I live far from living a perfect christian life, because its hard for one, because having Bipolar disorder, when im irratable and depressed and when I get angry I do horrible things I later regret and when I pray to God, I feel a lot that he doesnt forgive me, like sometimes I swear a lot, and I ask for forgiveness, but later on I end up doing it again. So I try thinking that God knows me more than I know myself and how he is a "merciful God" he knows the difficulties I go through and I will still hopefully go to heaven. At least when I go to church afterwards it feels like I can feel his presence in my heart and calms me down some, and it makes me feel a little better than how I was feeling before church.

Thank you everyone. I am glad that I am not alone in this. Thank you for the advice and please pray for me.

[Butterflygirl]

Ways to get closer to God . . .

1. Meditation
Get quiet and feeling God’s unconditional love for you.

2. Prayer
Talk to God (out loud or in your head) as if you were talking to a close, personal friend.

3. Humility
God is a higher power. You are a lesser power. You know this. You are humbled by it.

4. Study
Read, write, learn, listen.

5. Simplicity
Slow down. Experience and appreciate the simple things in life—nature, music, friends.

6. Solitude
Take some time to be alone and listen to your own inner music. Putter around your nest.

7. Submission
Surrender everything to God—as you understand God.

8. Service
Reach out to people in need and give of yourself and your resources.

9. Confession
Find someone you can trust and confide your deepest, darkest secrets to them.
Release the shame.

10. Worship
Be in awe of your Higher Power. Bow your head—metaphorically or literally.
Be thankful for the grace that has been freely given to you.

11. Celebration
Be grateful! Raise your hands in joy and celebration. Sing, dance and be merry.

12. Guidance
Work with a mentor who is in constant contact God.

13. Love
Love Yourself. Love God. Love Others

14. Forgive
Forgive yourself. Forgive God. Forgive others.

[Rapunzel]

I have felt a connection with God, and have felt that He loved me, but maintaining that connection is so hard sometimes. Most of the time, I just can't imagine why He would care about me. I guess that a lot of that comes from being dissatisfied with my upbringing, and not feeling cared about by my parents. (They would wonder how I can feel that way, but that's another story). T confronted me yesterday on professing to believe in something (my religion, which teaches of God's love for each of us), and not acting like, showing, or feeling like it actually applies to me. It's tough.

We have been instructed to pray, read the scriptures, serve others, attend church meetings, etc. At least in my church we have - I have no excuse for not knowing these things. But it is so easy to get caught up in the grinds of daily life, and neglect some of these things, which we are taught to do for our own good. I don't know why we struggle with it (why I struggle with it). It doesn't make sense. But if we would do these things, the connection would be there.

How Gentle God's Commands. How kind his precepts are. I don't have the whole song here in front of me, but maybe I'll post it later, or maybe one of you will know it. For me, music is the surest way to regain that connection.

Oh, I found the song online:

How gentle God's commands!
How kind His precepts are!
Come cast your burdens on the
Lord and trust His constant care.

Beneath his watchful eye,
His Saints securely dwell;
That hand which bears all nature up
Shall guard His children well.

Why should this anxious load
Press down your weary mind?
Haste, to your Heavenly Father's throne,
And sweet refreshment find.

His goodness stands approved,
Unchanged from day to day;
I'll drop my burden at His feet.
and bear a song away.

http://www.lisapowellmusic.com/how_gentle.htm

[wickedwings]

i know how you feel. my whole life, i felt so messed up - too messed up to have a connection. i live in hell - the hell that is my soul. i'm not a devil or a devil's advocate. i've been touched by a devil, yes. and that messed me up bad. i know i am forgiven, but i continue to suffer nonetheless. i wonder if, maybe, i'm supposed to suffer to pay for the sins of others and my own. i pray for the day that i would be free of this suffering once and for all....