[Crazygrl882]

My current dx is bipolar but my therapist thinks it may be schizoaffective. I am on seroquel but it's not stopping the psychotic symptoms. I am so paranoid and feel like everyone is watching me all the time. I can't relax at night because I have to check under my bed because I feel like there is some sort of demon under there with a long sword (when I try to think logically a sword wouldn't fit to stab through the bed but that's my fear). I feel like a bullet is going to come through the wall and shoot me while I'm sleeping. (I don't live in a dangerous area). I feel like my roommate has cameras in the house and is watching me all the time and I feel like strangers also have cameras into house to watch me. I can't believe this isn't true but my therapist tells me it's not true and I never found a camera. I feel like my roommate goes through all my stuff so I hide stuff in strange places. I also feel my thoughts are broadcast which I hate. I can't believe this isn't true. I sometimes feel others are plotting against me. These symptoms are making me crazy. I want to be normal and my psychiatrist can't find a med that helps me. My therapist isn't
Helping by telling me to be logical because logic doesn't help when you're afraid that something is going to come out of the mirror and kill you. What have others done to help these symptoms? I have all these in absence of my highs and lows. Does this sound like schizoaffective? I don't like my current doctor. She told me a few weeks ago she doesn't exactly know what to do with me ..... I don't quite trust her. But I also don't know. When I was in the hospital (psychiatric) I thought everyone there was plotting against me and putting thoughts in my head. I can't trust myself.

[Sometimes psychotic]

Seroquel is pretty much the weakest antipsychotic available as far as D2 binding have you tried risperidone...it's the strongest atypical...it also has it's own weird set of side effects with prolactin but it works. Unfortunately delusions take longer to clear up than hallucinations so it could take a few weeks of time to test out...

[worthit]

I get exactly the same symptoms. Paranoia that there are cameras around. Also thoughts of harm coming to me, that I will be robbed, raped, stabbed, murdered shot. It's a constant thought process that is part of our illness. We have to take something at that time to help us sleep. For me its either lunesta or a klonopin. Get to know your illness.read up about it. There's a good good called Schizoaffective demystifed.

[Crazygrl882]

My doctor just started me on zyprexa today. I'll see if that helps.

[optimistic_dolphin]

omg, i feel like i am in the same boat as you as to your doctor's response and treatment. My dr was trying to get me rationalise my thoughts. She only makes me feel worse and i feel like no one believes or understands me. It's impossible to be logical. The reason that plays a part only appears to be the whole attribute of the incident. She said it's CBT. If i am not willing to cooperate and work, nothing can help me anymore. WTH... Great, i just feel ever more alone. There's no one to tell or talk to. I feel your pain. The paranoia never leaves. It's in my head all the time. Everyone just wants me to die or gone.

[Frokly]

i have the same delusions, i think people are watching me through invisible cameras floating around that follows me and millions of people are watching, but nobody talks about it because they can't, one time i woke up with my body chopped up in four pieces and my brothers stabbed and killed me multiple times... i can empathize with you... the delusions just go on and on

just keep taking the zyprexa, it was a mixture of an increase of solian and zyprexa that virtually turned my head around and saved my life... was also in the psychiatric ward for a week max not too serious after an od thought i was invincible....

[FreedomFighter]

I have some of the same fears you described, as well as paranoia. I also am diagnosed with just bipolar 2 but am sure I have schizoaffective and I meet the diagnostic criteria in DSM-5 for it perfectly so I'm talking to my psychiatrist on Monday. Personally, I'm just going back on meds but a really amazing antipsuchotic which is very potent and excellent for delusions/hallucinations is perphenazine but again everybody reacts differently to meds so I don't know how it would work for you.. good luck though! I hope you figure something out.

[RRex]

I sleep to escape. No paranoia, no voices.

[Secretum]

I sleep to escape. No paranoia, no voices.

Me too. I sleep to escape the meaninglessness of life.

[RRex]

Originally Posted by Secretum

Me too. I sleep to escape the meaninglessness of life.

My shrink said people like us suffer so much because we see the truth.

[Shmooey]

Originally Posted by RRex

I sleep to escape. No paranoia, no voices.

Me too. I have a Friday night/Saturday ritual I need to do in order to function for the week.

Drop in bed by 9 p.m. Friday night, preferably 8:30 p.m. Sleep until 8 - 9 a.m. on Saturday morning. Wake up, eat something so I can take morning meds. Go back to sleep until 12 - 12:30 p.m.

Just woke up again. I too have the paranoid problem. Mine is dark aliens and white aliens following me everywhere, battling for control. There's the minor things like people talking about me behind my back if I walk past people laughing. But the big stuff like a parked car pointing a camera at my bedroom to watch me are what I need to sleep through.

[worthit]

So many of us have the people- talking- about me-behind- my- back problem. So debilitating. My camera issue was the cable box. Couldn't even get dressed in my bedroom. Finally got rid of it. Much better!

[Silent Void]

I have this problem with my ceiling fans. I keep feeling like there are cams in them.

I used to sleep in the buff but can't anymore because it's gotten so bad.

[Hobbit House]

I can understand tooo well where you are coming from. It's a nightmare. After I got stabilized on medication I felt pretty lost. I kept asking my Dr.."So, none of it was real?" "None of it," he'd tell me. It's amazing the frightening worlds that our minds can create due to this illness, and yes, your diagnosis is probably schizoaffective disorder.
-Laura
schizoaffective, bi-polar type

[Hobbit House]

Shmooey,
Just wanted to add that my husband used to be on zyprexa and said that what you're on is a very small dosage. I'm sorry you've been going through this hell. Hope you feel better soon.
Laura