[SlumberKitty]

I see my psychiatrist next week! Thank goodness!

[SlumberKitty]

I asked my pdoc to take me off of Lybalvi and put me back on Olanzapine which he is doing. And then he wants to increase the Latuda to 120 mg.

[SlumberKitty]

I must be in a depressed frame of mind. My last thought was literally: life sucks, and then you die.

[SlumberKitty]

Pdoc appointment later in about 2.5 hours. I'm nervous about it for some reason, even though he is always very nice to me.

[Breaking Dawn]

I've been having a hard time. But I'm hanging in there.

[Fuzzybear]

I'm sending hugs

[SlumberKitty]

Anyone read these books? I ordered them when I was at Barnes and Noble on Saturday with my niece.
What a Life Can Be: One Therapist's Take on Schizo-Affective Disorder.
and Finding the Point of Equilibrium: Schizo-Affective Disorder and Wellbeing, Living the Paradox!

[bpforever1]

I'm back in the USA and feel great. I felt stressed in Asia. And, I am much happier here. Life is a journey. I am still trekking my way through life.

[Breaking Dawn]

Originally Posted by bpforever1

I'm back in the USA and feel great. I felt stressed in Asia. And, I am much happier here. Life is a journey. I am still trekking my way through life.

Welcome back, bpforever1!!

[WastingAsparagus]

Originally Posted by bpforever1

I'm back in the USA and feel great. I felt stressed in Asia. And, I am much happier here. Life is a journey. I am still trekking my way through life.

That's cool. I used to live in Argentina for a time, and I am also back the USA now. The world is a very stressful place these days. I'm sure you'll appreciate your time in Asia. Sometimes it takes time to start appreciating it though.

[WastingAsparagus]

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

Anyone read these books? I ordered them when I was at Barnes and Noble on Saturday with my niece.
What a Life Can Be: One Therapist's Take on Schizo-Affective Disorder.
and Finding the Point of Equilibrium: Schizo-Affective Disorder and Wellbeing, Living the Paradox!

I haven't read those books, SK, but I have read one by Stephanie Anne Allen called "How to Survive Schizoaffective Disorder," one that is very short, but it has a lot of good thoughts and it is super uplifting. You might even consider getting the audiobook edition of it, as I really like listening to the audiobook edition of it especially when I am having a hard time.

[SlumberKitty]

Originally Posted by WastingAsparagus

I haven't read those books, SK, but I have read one by Stephanie Anne Allen called "How to Survive Schizoaffective Disorder," one that is very short, but it has a lot of good thoughts and it is super uplifting. You might even consider getting the audiobook edition of it, as I really like listening to the audiobook edition of it especially when I am having a hard time.

Thanks for the suggestion WA. I will look into it.

[SlumberKitty]

Hi friends,

I am out of Inpatient Hospitalization. I was there 6 days. My medicines got all switched up. I saw my GP today too.

I am still having having some psychosis and some

Possible trigger:

self harm thoughts but the suicidal thoughts are gone.

The hospital was alright. I didn't kick up or act out or anything so the nurses and doctors were pretty nice to me. But I could see their frustration with other patients who were not behaving.

It's not the hospital that I wanted to go to, but the one I wanted to go to had no beds so they transferred me to this one. It was okay. If I needed it, I wouldn't hesitate to go back there.

I missed the forums though.

HUGS all, Kit

[Breaking Dawn]

It's so nice to have you back, @SlumberKitty!

[SlumberKitty]

Originally Posted by Breaking Dawn

It's so nice to have you back, @SlumberKitty!

Thank you Breaking Dawn!

[SlumberKitty]

Meh. I am okay I guess. I'm not doing great. But I am trying to hang in there.

[Breaking Dawn]

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

Meh. I am okay I guess. I'm not doing great. But I am trying to hang in there.

I hope you feel a lot better real soon, dear Kit. Sending wishes filled with love and healing energy from the cosmos and angels.

[Deilla]

I had to quit my online therapy. So I feel very alone. My gf is in Italy and is very busy. So often I don't hear from her. I didn't hear from her this afternoon. So I am very sad. I know I shouldn't let it get me down, but it's disappointing. I have no one to talk to. I tried calling my mom to chat, but my mom didn't answer the phone. My sisters rarely talk to me. I did email a couple of friends, so that is good.

[bpforever1]

I'm doing better. My classes are fun and challenging. I'm doing well. My mother is still a harangutan- orangutan. But, I feel good about myself. My family values me now since I do chores and tasks. I also am stable because of my shots. I'm happy to be busy. My mother is improving too. I'm happy for her.

[Breaking Dawn]

I'm doing ok right now.

[bpforever1]

I'm doing ok. I am waiting for my brother and dad to return home to eat dinner. I made curry with my mom. I feel really good that I returned home. I have a family still. My parents are elderly but they taught me that life continues with age and stops only with death. My illness is stable again. The shots really work. The side effects are the same- sleepiness and hunger. I can tolerate these over psychotic symptoms. I sometimes wish that I won't become psychotic again but this is not the case. I know I probably will get stressed again but need to just get my shots no matter what. I actually like the feeling of calmness now. Before, I was agitated. I will survive. But, I want to be happy surviving and healthy. I don't watch the news that much anymore because it is depressing. I am in my own world. I try to do things that make me happy.


My bookkeeping class drives me nuts though. I like making tables but balancing debits and credits is driving me batty. I never took an accounting class before and now am taking two. I want to take two more classes in accounting to help my family's business. But, that will do it for me. I'm taking classes with people who want to be certified accountants. It makes me laugh because I find it to be laborious and tedious. But, I guess, someone has to do accounting in the world. I am not business-oriented but realize counting money is important for economic survival. I like the challenge of learning new skills but can't see myself balancing numbers for the rest of my life. Well, I know this is not for me. I do have to balance the books for my family's business but hopefully I will do this part-time for the time being and do another more interesting job.


I was really into my appearance while psychotic but now am not worried about it. I am not going to attract anyone nor am I interested in attracting anyone. I've gotten over being single and like being single. I enjoy my freedom and my independence. I also like just being with my family. I feel very blessed to have a family still despite their insanity.


Overall, I'm doing fine. I'm proud of myself for recovering and being productive. I also am happy my mother is recovering physically although she is progressively declining from dementia cognitively. It can't be helped. I try to understand her. Boy, she was mean to me throughout my life. But, she is my only mother. For better or worse she tried to do what she thought was right for herself. I got over trying to understand her insane ways. I just accept her and ignore her tantrums. She has been the most difficult person I know. I feel her pain for being a child of the war era. I know it must have been hard for her. She is a misogynist and hates being a woman- she told me this. So, I suffered because of her narrow-minded perspective. I know my mental illness is partially due to her genetics and to her treatment of me. I forgave her a long time ago for being cruel to me. My father was cruel to her too though. He is a typical male chauvinist pig. He never does housework and only changed my diaper once as a child. He made alot of mistakes too but I realized he did not know any better.

I forgave him too. As someone with an insane family, I turned out ok- I believe. I am not mad at the world- just insane myself at times. It could not be helped that I became mentally ill. I am trying to the the best I can to survive with it. At times, it is difficult since my family is not supportive continually. They are too old now. I am blessed to have come home to them while they are still alive. I feel very grateful about making the choice to return home. I would have been very sad to not see my mother again although she drives me nuts.


I am happier now. The shot really cleared my mind. Thank goodness!

[Breaking Dawn]

Thank you, @bpforever1, for coming back & posting with us. I'm always wishing the best for you. The best of luck to you with all your endeavors!

[Deilla]

I'm still having poor communication with my gf in Italy. Some of my friends say she is catfishing me. She has been promising to come for a visit but keeps changing her mind. I think she is just trying to get my hopes up for nothing. I don't know what's going on. When I ask direct questions, she won't answer. I didn't get to talk with her today. It makes me feel sad. I have been very stressed over the entire situation. I started smoking and vaping again. I quit a year ago. She's not worth me ruining my health. And my non-sensical voice has been very active, which is upsetting. But the stress is so great I can't control the voice.

[Brego]

My symptoms wanted to start doing more things. EEKK. I wasn't used to what all it was doing before, how do I cope? I better get some real sense of being able to handle this monster of Schizoaffective disorder.

[avagabor]

I'm doing OK today. I slept really good last night. I have some lidocaine cream which I put on my ribs and hips that helped me sleep. Mentally, I'm good. No voices yet today. No mood changes. Me and my boyfriend are going up the beach today. He's going to play harmonica with his band for a party. Just going to support him and for the music. We live with my mom and brother.. Not a good situation, but that's how our finances are. It's sunny and 61F. Have a good day, Everyone!