 |
| FAQ/Help |
| Calendar |
| Search |
|
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
Jul 12, 2023 at 06:40 PM
#1
Therapy has shown me that I really hate external validation/criticism.
And it's because, I've had so many people, especially family, use these as manipulation, control, or other malicious, dishonest reasons. They were used as emotional psychological weapons that hurt pretty badly. Growing up I had to pretend like I didn't care about being praised or criticized because it helped stop the manipulation, emotional abuse, anger outbursts, and other problems triggered by my reactions to these things. No reaction meant no problems, no pain. Even today I still do this, acting like none of it is important just to protect myself. I honestly can't even stand good criticism that is actually helpful. I can't stand a simple compliment. It all feels like lies, manipulation, problems that I must protect myself from. It's exhausting. It's always been exhausting. |
 Reply With Quote
|
 CANDC
|
|
Super Moderator
Community Support Team Community Liaison
Chat Leader 
Member Since May 2014
Location: Northeast USA New England
Posts: 17,800
(SuperPoster!)
10 2,351 hugs
given 
|
Jul 12, 2023 at 07:03 PM
#2
@LoneWolf001 I hear you. Knowing others' intentions is difficult. But I find I lose too much if I cut off everything. Or I validate myself by saying "I am doing the best I can under the circumstances."
__________________ Super Moderator Community Support Team "Things Take Time" |
|
Reply With Quote
|
| Reply |
|
|
Similar Threads
|
||||
| Thread | Forum | |||
| unhealthy self criticism vs healthy self criticism? | Steps to Better Self-Esteem | |||
| *praise*my mom | Sanctuary for Spiritual Support | |||
| Getting praise from your T | Psychotherapy | |||
| Praise to my God | Sanctuary for Spiritual Support | |||
My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
Linear Mode
