[newtus]

from the mental hospital last month...i keep seeing this woman that kept by my side often ..in my head. she was a real person. i keep seeing her in my minds eye but i also have been hearing her voice..well like a voice...like you know another one. she talks to me daily and has for 2 weeks or so. tells me things will be ok and that she will be there for me...

im hearing the voice of this person..? i cant get my mind off it but she comes multiple times a day and tells me comforting things. ive never had such a thing before..such a voice...

im kind of...scared...paranoid because i know this person is real but they are talking to me like voices ive heard. ive heard voices of poeople i knew before but..never comforting...well i dont KNOW her but ive been to the hospital a number of times and she has sat with me.

[newtus]

its comforting but im extremely paranoid about it like they are watching me????!!

I don't blame you for being paranoid... I don't get distinct voices, but when I see a figure in my mind's eye (just like you do), it's really easy to get impressions about their intent. Or even sometimes with the mumbled voices. The atmosphere changes. So I've had a few comforting feelings from this...
It's hard to tell whether they're nice because they truly are or if they're nice just so they can stay watching you. But I think most subconscious voices are very straightforward... Don't let your paranoia taint her kindness. Maybe she can make the bad ones go away! : )

[newtus]

yea the voices dont make me paranoid but seeing her in my minds eye does cause i see her face. the expression on her face which i cant comprehend the expression. idk know what it means. then i think shes watching. idk how to describe it.

Maybe she's protecting you? You said she only shows up when you're in the hospital, yet she's been "following" you lately... Perhaps she's trying to prevent you from getting so bad you have to be hospitalized again? Maybe she wants you to be aware & take care of yourself.

[newtus]

lol no no

this is an ACTUAL mental health tech i met in the hospital last month. BUT since i left ive been seeing her in my mind. focusing all on me. and sometimes like shes here next to me. because in the hospital this lady actually sat with me a lot.
BUT THEN i hear her voice like its a new voice
i could be doing anything and shell comment on what im doing and if im afraid shell comfort me or protect me.

ugh embarrassing.

Hm! Well I can see how you thinking her stalking you is kinda spooky now, since she's an actual person. Geeze... But at least her voice is comforting! I hope you stay safe. : ]

[newtus]

thanks for this.

its startng to feel more uncomfortable as shes ...invading my privacy should i say?...

i have thoughts of the police watching me in my bathroom..while i use it. thats why i dont shower. main reason.

im having those thoughts with this one to but...i see her in my minds eye watching me. then her voice will come later...

hm...its getting unnerving...

Oh god. I've been having thoughts of people stalking me in the bathroom for years... And just tonight they came back. :/

I don't blame you for being unnerved. Hopefully she goes away soon... Is there anything that specifically triggers you to sense her? Maybe you can control it!

[Astonmartin]

Iv read the above I was diagnosed with schitzophrenia 6 years ago,I experience the same things,there was always voices telling I'm no good,telling me all the bad things that happend I'm my life,,but the scariest part was that wenever I think sumthing ,I can be sure that the voices will comment on wot I just thought,its was like they could read my mind...Then there was this voice ,I don't know him but every vioce in my my head refered to him as ¡°The King¡±...so wenever he start talking every other voice in my head keeps quiet,,so much respect for him....but I'm better now they gone ,well not completely or that's wot I think,,its like hearing or eavesdropping on a conversation now but u can't make out wot the say,,thank god for that...but I'm still taking my chorpromazine at nite...no stoping me..

[newtus]

Originally Posted by Shayatanica

Oh god. I've been having thoughts of people stalking me in the bathroom for years.....

... Is there anything that specifically triggers you to sense her?

really??? me too...
i always thought it was the police.....either hiding in my bathroom shower behind the curtain and/or has my bathroom bugged in the vents with cameras...everytime i go in my bathroom i look behind the curtain

and not really shes been here all day everyday for about 2-3 weeks now. like i just woke up and she popped into my head unexpectedly. then i could sense her around me. she just follows me..idk..comments on what i do..anything..everything. sometimes reports it what i do to someone but idk who??? just like what an MHT does. this lady is an MHT.

[KUREHA]

Sorry wish I could give you some good advice

newtus, what's an MHT? I suck with acronyms hahahha.

But yeah! Even since I was a little kid, before I started having regular hallucinations & problems... I've always thought I was going to be murdered in the shower. And if the shower has an opaque curtain, I need to leave it open when I use the toilet/sink because I get worried that the murderer is hiding in there. D:

[newtus]

Originally Posted by Shayatanica

what's an MHT?...

MHT = Mental Health Tech

in inpatient..
they are part of the staff that tackles you down before the nurses give those shots in your bottom
they are the ones that watch the area where everyone is at daily
stuff like that.

its a heirarchy inside.
its like this:

Psychiatrist (Doctor)
Social Workers/Therapists
Nurses
Mental Health Techs

theres others here and there. but these people are needed daily. the last two 24/7.

Originally Posted by Shayatanica

...since I was a little kid, before I started having regular hallucinations & problems... I've always thought I was going to be murdered in the shower. And if the shower has an opaque curtain, I need to leave it open when I use the toilet/sink because I get worried that the murderer is hiding in there...

i thought my parents were actually part of the..like..private investigators for the USA and everytime they left the room i thought they were in the camera room watching me to see either if i did something bad or if like i was intelligent.

i used to go around the house talking to the tv sets and the radios straight into them like they were cameras. I THOUGHT THEY WERE! still do. but to imagine myself thinking that is kinda embarrassing. i was like....9, 10, 11 years old.

Ah okay! Thank you for clarifying. : D

I was suspicious of my Mum, but never thought she was ever a major part of anything. Lately, a lot of my paranoia has been directed at my mother in law to be. Hahahaha, I feel silly after I think that kind of stuff though... I regularly catch myself assuming she intends to set the apartment on fire with me in it or she's been poisoning my food, etc.
As soon as I saw on tv about the two-way mirrors they use in investigation rooms, I started being careful about the kind of things I said or did in front of mirrors. I would explain every action after I did it so I wouldn't look weird. As if that helped? XD