[RunningEagleRuns]

Its been going better for me, I guess, I asked my doctor to raise my clonidine to help with the pressure I get. (pressure to do stupid things like drop out of school and stuff like that) I think i'm going to be treated for depression. I dont want to be treated for it though. My doctor told I have to use a treadmill for 30 minutes every day. He was pretty serious about it. I tried to eat less because I'm like 120 pounds overweight but went back to eating alot. I'm going to try to be active for 30 minutes like my doctor wants.

I couldnt today because it was raining pretty much all day. See you! Ill add more maybe.

[costello]

Glad to hear you're doing better, RER. Good luck with the exercise and diet.

I was just thinking about you yesterday - remembering your question about being a cop. Have you thought about your career goals anymore? Maybe focusing on goals will inspire you to stay in school and working toward good grades.

Aren't you 18, btw? You should be very close to graduating. Why drop out now?

[RunningEagleRuns]

Originally Posted by costello

Glad to hear you're doing better, RER. Good luck with the exercise and diet.

I was just thinking about you yesterday - remembering your question about being a cop. Have you thought about your career goals anymore? Maybe focusing on goals will inspire you to stay in school and working toward good grades.

Aren't you 18, btw? You should be very close to graduating. Why drop out now?

I dont plan on dropping out, even though the voices want me too. I have 1 year left in highschool.

[RunningEagleRuns]

I feel pretty crappy now. Im halfway depressed. =/

[costello]

Originally Posted by RunningEagleRuns

I feel pretty crappy now. Im halfway depressed. =/

Sorry. That's life. Some up, some down.

It always reminds me of that children's book, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. "My mom says some days are like that. Even in Australia."

Hope today's better for you.

[Trippin2.0]

Thinking of you RER. I hope the sun shines on you soon

[likewater]

Thinking of you also, runningeagleruns. You are a cool kid. :-)
May angels surround you. Peace.

[RunningEagleRuns]

thanks everyone!

[costello]

Originally Posted by RunningEagleRuns

thanks everyone!

Hope things are better now. I know when things start going south for me, I start catastrophizing. I have to remind myself that into every life a little rain will fall.

[RunningEagleRuns]

im drinking caffeine again.. it makes me feel good =]

i get alot of crap for drinking it again. some from the voices but mostly from my conscience...

is that normal?? my conscience gives me crap for most things, mind you. =P

i hope its not normal

tell me the truth if you think it is normal, plz

[fishsandwich]

RunningEagles, my voices HATE it when I drink caffeine! I do get really shaky from it though, so they have good reason. And none of us ( ) like the word "normal".

[RunningEagleRuns]

Originally Posted by fishsandwich

RunningEagles, my voices HATE it when I drink caffeine! I do get really shaky from it though, so they have good reason. And none of us ( ) like the word "normal".

hehe.. stupid voices..

Hmm, maybe they hate caffeine because it makes THEM hyperactive? And most people with a healthy conscience get reprimanded by it regularly. I suppose its for your own good though. Caffeine reduces insulin sensitivity & all that... I'm an avid coffee drinker, so I really shouldn't be talking! Hahaha

I'm okay this morning, though. And last night wasn't too bad. Probably because I finally came back over here & got some validation on the weird **** I've been going through! But we'll see what happens today. And I'm dreading/anticipating tomorrow as well... Glad you're doing okay though!! : )

[fishsandwich]

Originally Posted by Shayatanica

Hmm, maybe they hate caffeine because it makes THEM hyperactive?

Oh Lord, yes. I never knew voices could "bounce" until I had six cups of espresso on a very delayed flight in a very cold place once. Mind you, with that much espresso even the most stable of people would be bouncing against the walls!

Glad you're doing a bit better, Shayatanica

Originally Posted by fishsandwich

Oh Lord, yes. I never knew voices could "bounce" until I had six cups of espresso on a very delayed flight in a very cold place once. Mind you, with that much espresso even the most stable of people would be bouncing against the walls!

Glad you're doing a bit better, Shayatanica

LMFAO!! I mean... I'm sure it wasn't funny at the time, but that story is hilarious. I'm just imagining it now. Hahaha XD

And thanks! Still trying to piece together the puzzle but I should perhaps have a little closure tomorrow.

[RunningEagleRuns]

giving up caffeine again...

[RunningEagleRuns]

stupid voices want me to go to summer school, even though i dont need to... doesnt make sense

Hm... Maybe they're trying to imply to keep learning through the summer? Does going to school & learning distract you enough to where they don't bug you as much? Maybe it's a riddled message about that. Not specifically summer school, but they want you to continue your education to keep you on a schedule.

[RunningEagleRuns]

i think they just like messing with me =]

[fishsandwich]

Originally Posted by RunningEagleRuns

stupid voices want me to go to summer school, even though i dont need to... doesnt make sense

Tell them that if you go to summer school, then THEY will have to come with you - and you'll take something dreadfully boring out of spite.

[RunningEagleRuns]

Originally Posted by fishsandwich

Tell them that if you go to summer school, then THEY will have to come with you - and you'll take something dreadfully boring out of spite.

hehe thats funny

[RunningEagleRuns]

im doing better =] sometimes i even forget i have a illness. this is a example for everyone elsE going through something difficult - LIFE GETS BETTER! see ya'll

[RunningEagleRuns]

still stressed out - want this stuff to be over

[KUREHA]

Hope things change soon.

Change can only come from within. When I first was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, I started researching right away. I read anything I could find on the web. I bought books as reference guides.

As I started to absorb information, I learned how to recognize certain behaviors. Once I did that, I was able to function better. My pdoc says I am doing great. I don't feel great. In some cases I know what is happening, but I can't stop it.

My pdoc has my blood drawn about every three months. I think he's also making sure I'm not a drug addict. I take anti-psychotic drugs and benzo's. I'm not addicted to them. I organize the pills in a container with the days of the week. That way I don't take too much.Some times I can't remember if I took my pills. But, if I take them at the same time every day, there will be less confusion.