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#1
Apr 25, 2014, 11:45 PM
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I was locked up for possession of weed and I'm transgender. So the officers running this jail decided I should be put in "Protective Custody". What that really means is put in isolation. I was locked away by myself for 3 weeks with no one to talk to or listen to, only the four concrete walls. After about 5 days of this I began to hallucinate very seriously.
I begged the corrections officers to put me in with the general population but they all said I would "be hurt". I told them I didn't care because I was loosing my mind. That was about a month ago and i'm still hallucinating. I have been diagnosed with psychosis. The psychiatrist gave me Zyprexa but that can cause diabetes so I stopped taking the medicine and I'm psychotic again. Now I just want to hurt myself for some reason. I have to go to court for the 1/2 lb. of weed I'm charged with possessing and distributing and if they find me guilty I'll lose my disability income and my apartment. I know that I didn't do half of what I'm charged with doing. I'm so hopeless that all I want is to disappear. Now I have the hallucinations back, the court date and I'm brutally depressed.  What the heck can I do? It seems like the end is near one way or another. I'm just plain old  ****ed either way I look at it.
Last edited by Christina86; May 04, 2014 at 12:37 AM. Reason: added trigger icon |
 bluekoi, misslabarinth, Sometimes psychotic
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#2
Jun 05, 2014, 09:02 PM
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BeatenDown, Hello and welcome to PsychCentral.
 PC Forums is great place to learn, share and make new friends!  Hang in there! Best of luck with your court date.  |
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#3
Jun 05, 2014, 09:23 PM
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I'm not sure you will lose your disability so long as you didn't become disabled due to the crime. See this info as it applies to felonies there is suspension of your benefits while in prison as you are already being fed and housed.
Can You Get Disability If You've Had a Felony? | Disability Secrets
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Hugs!
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 bluekoi
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#4
Jun 05, 2014, 09:29 PM
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If you don't want to risk diabetes you can try any of the typical antipsychotics...they are older cheaper meds like haldol...all of the meds have their own risk/benefit scenario but being psychotic isn't going to help you at your court date so I recommend you take something...
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Hugs!
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#5
Jun 05, 2014, 09:57 PM
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Quote:
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#6
Jun 06, 2014, 08:48 AM
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This pisses me off soo much
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#7
Jun 07, 2014, 12:17 PM
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do not hurt yourself. there are ALWAYS better times ahead. be patient with yourself and listen to the good voice inside of you.....that is you.
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| bluekoi, misslabarinth, Sometimes psychotic
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#8
Jun 07, 2014, 05:03 PM
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Quote:
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Hugs!
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#9
Jun 13, 2014, 07:50 AM
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Hey,
I am so sorry to hear about what you're going through. Honestly I would be so pissed I would sue the damn police department. You are no different than anyone else and just because you choose your life in another way than others it's nothing they can be mean about. You need to hang in there. You have no reason to hurt yourself. I know a lot of medications can cause diabetes. Hell I'm on some that can. But it's a better option than being in your current state. Keep your head up. I'm here if you need me. |
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