[xxMrRacerxx]

If I am posting this in the wrong location I apologize. I'll try to keep it as short as possible but at the same time I am craving knowledge. Here's our story:

I am a recently divorced single Dad. I have 3 absolutely amazing children, two daugthers 14y and 11y and a son that is 4y. Mom currently is not in the picture due to a substance abuse problem. A little quick background would tell you that we lost a son to SIDS two years after our oldest daughter was born, this set the stage for our current situation as I have come to know.

My oldest daughter, 2 at the time of our loss, always talked about seeing what she explained as a figure(an angel of sorts) after the loss of her brother(4 months old). At that time we figured it was a coping device for her and what she had experienced.

Fast forward to a year ago, I was told that my daughter was "cutting" to me this was unimaginable, completely unacceptable, as I could not see how this was an outlet for someone depressed. I was completely ignorant on the subject. I took her to her pediatrician and we agreed that she needed to be evaluated at Childrens Hospital because of our concerns, so after her evaluation they admitted her to a hospital for depression.

This 6 hour ordeal ended with me leaving my daughter 65miles away from me and a extremely mind bending drive home with all the things i'd been told flashing through my mind, I admit I have never felt more alone and scared then I did at this point... After a 10 week stay at this hospital I picked up my girl, she was happy, smiling and acting like a 14yo should. I learn some things that I had not known up until this time, my ex-wide had abused my daughter, going as far as to knock her out. I felt I had fail her, even though I had not been told, I should have seen some sign that this was taking place, how could it have been...

They placed her on Prozac 15mg and after a few visits to mental health and increases in prozac we learned that she had been hearing voices. This is where I really need some help. Upon learning about these voices I called and setup an appointment to start a new treatment plan, My daughter was excited that she was going to be getting help and everything was going great until the day of her appointment, while getting out of the car at the Dr office she told me she didn't want to go in, and after a small argument in the parking lot we entered the office and proceeded with a new treatment that increased Prozac to 30mg and now includes Risperdal .50 at night. The first night we started with the Risperdal led to another ordeal, she didn't want to take the new med because the voices are telling her not to. I'm sitting here looking my daughter in the eyes and completely unable to understand that her voices are as real as I am to her, I admit I was upset. I kept asking myself, how can this be, how can she listen to something that wasn't real, and defy me, her dad that loves her with every inch of his heart and is real. This only shows my ignorance in the subject again, my mind at that time couldn't processes what was happening in her mind. I found myself as lost as ever...

Ok, this is why I'm here. I want to learn. I am reading your stories, and open to listen to what you guys have to say. I love my kids more than I do anything, and to know I can't relate or understand whats effecting on of them so badly is killing me. I guess what I'm asking for is guidance, a new approach, am I prohibiting this by certain actions? Are there things I should look for that help me find answers? How do I know if this is being used as a crutch for her at sometimes, instead of a serious onset. I'm open, understanding, and completely willing to dedicated my life to make sure my three kids have the best life possible, but I am also cautious to not become an enabler. I'm search for understanding... Thanks for taking a look at this, especially if you made it this far, lol. Any suggestions are appreciated, Links to info, stories, that may not be listed on the site, anything to continue my search for answers..

[junkDNA]

hey mrracer

glad u posted. i have this same fear ur daughter has about taking my risperdal. when i am hearing the voices they tell me not to take it and they scream at me if i do. but what i have learned is that all they can do is talk . they cannot hurt me or people i love. sometimes when its bad i call my Therapist and he talks me through taking them and trys to distract me after i take them by talking to me on the phone. this helps me not feel so alone with the voices. i dont know if this helps u but this is my story. i could just relate to your daughter.

it also helps to know that the voices dont wnat me to take it because they know it will make them go away. so if i want them to go away i know i have to take my meds.

[punkybrewster6k]

Originally Posted by xxMrRacerxx

If I am posting this in the wrong location I apologize. I'll try to keep it as short as possible but at the same time I am craving knowledge. Here's our story:

I am a recently divorced single Dad. I have 3 absolutely amazing children, two daugthers 14y and 11y and a son that is 4y. Mom currently is not in the picture due to a substance abuse problem. A little quick background would tell you that we lost a son to SIDS two years after our oldest daughter was born, this set the stage for our current situation as I have come to know.

My oldest daughter, 2 at the time of our loss, always talked about seeing what she explained as a figure(an angel of sorts) after the loss of her brother(4 months old). At that time we figured it was a coping device for her and what she had experienced.

Fast forward to a year ago, I was told that my daughter was "cutting" to me this was unimaginable, completely unacceptable, as I could not see how this was an outlet for someone depressed. I was completely ignorant on the subject. I took her to her pediatrician and we agreed that she needed to be evaluated at Childrens Hospital because of our concerns, so after her evaluation they admitted her to a hospital for depression.

This 6 hour ordeal ended with me leaving my daughter 65miles away from me and a extremely mind bending drive home with all the things i'd been told flashing through my mind, I admit I have never felt more alone and scared then I did at this point... After a 10 week stay at this hospital I picked up my girl, she was happy, smiling and acting like a 14yo should. I learn some things that I had not known up until this time, my ex-wide had abused my daughter, going as far as to knock her out. I felt I had fail her, even though I had not been told, I should have seen some sign that this was taking place, how could it have been...

They placed her on Prozac 15mg and after a few visits to mental health and increases in prozac we learned that she had been hearing voices. This is where I really need some help. Upon learning about these voices I called and setup an appointment to start a new treatment plan, My daughter was excited that she was going to be getting help and everything was going great until the day of her appointment, while getting out of the car at the Dr office she told me she didn't want to go in, and after a small argument in the parking lot we entered the office and proceeded with a new treatment that increased Prozac to 30mg and now includes Risperdal .50 at night. The first night we started with the Risperdal led to another ordeal, she didn't want to take the new med because the voices are telling her not to. I'm sitting here looking my daughter in the eyes and completely unable to understand that her voices are as real as I am to her, I admit I was upset. I kept asking myself, how can this be, how can she listen to something that wasn't real, and defy me, her dad that loves her with every inch of his heart and is real. This only shows my ignorance in the subject again, my mind at that time couldn't processes what was happening in her mind. I found myself as lost as ever...

Ok, this is why I'm here. I want to learn. I am reading your stories, and open to listen to what you guys have to say. I love my kids more than I do anything, and to know I can't relate or understand whats effecting on of them so badly is killing me. I guess what I'm asking for is guidance, a new approach, am I prohibiting this by certain actions? Are there things I should look for that help me find answers? How do I know if this is being used as a crutch for her at sometimes, instead of a serious onset. I'm open, understanding, and completely willing to dedicated my life to make sure my three kids have the best life possible, but I am also cautious to not become an enabler. I'm search for understanding... Thanks for taking a look at this, especially if you made it this far, lol. Any suggestions are appreciated, Links to info, stories, that may not be listed on the site, anything to continue my search for answers..

Welcome to PC.
We have a lot in common.
My daughter has been in and out of the hospital since she was 12. She is 14 now. Same symptoms.
Make sure she has a good pdoc and therapist.
Make sure she sees them often.
Not taking her meds is a tough one. Let the doc know because she needs them. It sounds like you are on top of this. Very good.
We are going through some of the same issues that you are but she takes her meds since she found out the hard way what happens. Psychosis. Bean has been 'not well' since she was young. Who knows all that causes it. Anything and everything. Dont beat yourself up over it. I would suggest the Schizophrenia and psychosis forum. But you can choose to post wherever you feel comfrtable. There is a lot of support here and people who can help and relate. Lots of good advice.too!

Sent from my SCH-S720C using Tapatalk 2

[punkybrewster6k]

..and I will add that I felt the way you do.
That she HAS to be making this crap up.
Well, I have come to learn that usually no.
She is very much serious from what you have explained.
You are not enabling. A girl her age does not look for attention in this way.

Sent from my SCH-S720C using Tapatalk 2

[pink&grey]

Hi there and welcome. I think you are on the right board. I'm new to this board as well, and am also a single parent. My son is 12 and has a long history of issues that have recently escalated. I don't have any answers really, but just wanted to let you know that I "get it". This is confusing and you want to understand, but it's just so difficult and confusing. You aren't alone as a parent. Here's a link to my first post here that you may want to scan. A lot of people queued in with some good insight and some of the questions you have asked were answered because I had the same ones!!

http://forums.psychcentral.com/schiz...p-mom-out.html

[punkybrewster6k]

AND...a 10 week stay at hospital does not happen unless there is something serious going on.
A normal stay is 7-10 days.
My daughter was 6 weeks the first time.

Sent from my SCH-S720C using Tapatalk 2

[faerie_moon_x]

Hi, welcome to PC.

I think one thing as a person whose dad didn't believe in mental health care, you've already done so much and are a hero to your daughter. Be there. Believe her and believe in her. Mental illness doesn't mean she won't be able to lead a full life but she's just going to have some extra challenges to others. There's a lot of discriminiation out there against us.

Also, things can get bad and often as the person ill you don't even know it's happening. Everything around you becomes a threat, bad, evil, and the enemy. Surviving it is not easy, so having a real support is good.

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by xxMrRacerxx

If I am posting this in the wrong location I apologize. I'll try to keep it as short as possible but at the same time I am craving knowledge. Here's our story:

I am a recently divorced single Dad. I have 3 absolutely amazing children, two daugthers 14y and 11y and a son that is 4y. Mom currently is not in the picture due to a substance abuse problem. A little quick background would tell you that we lost a son to SIDS two years after our oldest daughter was born, this set the stage for our current situation as I have come to know.

My oldest daughter, 2 at the time of our loss, always talked about seeing what she explained as a figure(an angel of sorts) after the loss of her brother(4 months old). At that time we figured it was a coping device for her and what she had experienced.

Fast forward to a year ago, I was told that my daughter was "cutting" to me this was unimaginable, completely unacceptable, as I could not see how this was an outlet for someone depressed. I was completely ignorant on the subject. I took her to her pediatrician and we agreed that she needed to be evaluated at Childrens Hospital because of our concerns, so after her evaluation they admitted her to a hospital for depression.

This 6 hour ordeal ended with me leaving my daughter 65miles away from me and a extremely mind bending drive home with all the things i'd been told flashing through my mind, I admit I have never felt more alone and scared then I did at this point... After a 10 week stay at this hospital I picked up my girl, she was happy, smiling and acting like a 14yo should. I learn some things that I had not known up until this time, my ex-wide had abused my daughter, going as far as to knock her out. I felt I had fail her, even though I had not been told, I should have seen some sign that this was taking place, how could it have been...

They placed her on Prozac 15mg and after a few visits to mental health and increases in prozac we learned that she had been hearing voices. This is where I really need some help. Upon learning about these voices I called and setup an appointment to start a new treatment plan, My daughter was excited that she was going to be getting help and everything was going great until the day of her appointment, while getting out of the car at the Dr office she told me she didn't want to go in, and after a small argument in the parking lot we entered the office and proceeded with a new treatment that increased Prozac to 30mg and now includes Risperdal .50 at night. The first night we started with the Risperdal led to another ordeal, she didn't want to take the new med because the voices are telling her not to. I'm sitting here looking my daughter in the eyes and completely unable to understand that her voices are as real as I am to her, I admit I was upset. I kept asking myself, how can this be, how can she listen to something that wasn't real, and defy me, her dad that loves her with every inch of his heart and is real. This only shows my ignorance in the subject again, my mind at that time couldn't processes what was happening in her mind. I found myself as lost as ever...

Ok, this is why I'm here. I want to learn. I am reading your stories, and open to listen to what you guys have to say. I love my kids more than I do anything, and to know I can't relate or understand whats effecting on of them so badly is killing me. I guess what I'm asking for is guidance, a new approach, am I prohibiting this by certain actions? Are there things I should look for that help me find answers? How do I know if this is being used as a crutch for her at sometimes, instead of a serious onset. I'm open, understanding, and completely willing to dedicated my life to make sure my three kids have the best life possible, but I am also cautious to not become an enabler. I'm search for understanding... Thanks for taking a look at this, especially if you made it this far, lol. Any suggestions are appreciated, Links to info, stories, that may not be listed on the site, anything to continue my search for answers..

This is a great place to post---we love supportive parents here---
OK so you will likely get a different response from each of us as our experiences are different...my voices were actually pleasant and helpful for the most part although I only experienced them for a short time it was still hard to let them go----they are not inherently evil just an unexpressed part of ourselves. I let them go because I realized they were "wrong" but I had 36 years without them as experience to make that decision. What you are asking your daughter to do is eradicate something that may have been with her for nearly as long as she has lived. Imagine if someone asked you to eliminate a friend you've known for ten years for the reason that it was not acceptable to society. This is as real to her as any other thought or experience and making it go away with drugs may not be something she wants. For me my hallucinations were actually more real than life---there is a certain intensity to them and your brain is basically designing its own ever changing game...if you stop paying attention it will change the game to something else---tired of angels...why not dragons today? It's very much like what goes on during dreams where they are customized to fit you.

So I don't know what they have diagnosed her with but hearing voices alone is not symptomatic of mental illness...some people hear voices and continue on with their lives much like people who don't hear voices----the rate of occurrence of this around 5% with an even greater number having more infrequent hallucinations. It's possible she is simply a voice hearer and not schizophrenic or some other mental ilness...the key diagnostic feature is impairment socially or at school/work. Personally if she hasn't been impaired I would let her make the choice about whether to be treated for the voices or not. She may wish to keep them. The drugs are not innocuous they can make you gain weight, develop diabetes or a movement disorder called TD. They have also been shown to cause brain degeneration over time. Once you are on them there is also an increased chance or a relapse upon rapid withdrawal so there is no real changing your mind about and just quitting without an extensive taper.

I know the voices seem scary but ask her what they mean to her, they may not be scary at all. I mean to me having an angel around seems like a very nice thing. Try not to see it as her choosing the voices over listening to you but choosing to listen to her own mind----the voices are after all her thoughts albeit in an unfiltered form. What if I walked up to you and told you that a percentage of your own thoughts were deemed wrong or somehow incompatible with society but not to worry we had a pill that would fix you----perhaps we would eliminate the anger you would feel if someone cut you off in traffic or spilled coffee on you or whatever---it really would be best for society if you never thought angry thoughts at all ever---would you take the pill for society, perhaps you would take it for yourself if you didn't see the advantage to anger or perhaps you would refuse to take the pill because you felt anger was the most natural state of your mind if people were being inconsiderate---it is after all, all you've known. This is what has happened you are telling her the very way she thinks at its most basic level is wrong----but what I'm saying is its only wrong if it doesn't work for her, its not about you or anybody else---now if she was going to hurt herself(and I'm talking suicide here not cutting) or others because of the voices it becomes a different game and that's why there are laws but most people don't get to that level. Anyway that's my opinion I'm sure there will be others----the one thing you will find is no two of us are alike---

You've had some great advice here. I don't really have anything to add, but I just wanted to say that I read your post and wish your family all the best with this. Actually, I just thought (as a sister of somebody with pretty bad ADHD in their teens who got completely ignored during that time) that, though it's tough for your 14yo right now and you naturally need to focus on that, you also need to include the other children as they are likely scared their sister is ill with something they may not understand, or may be angry that she's getting so much attention, or any number of things. Just don't forget them in all the drama. You sound like a good Dad though so I'm sure you've got this covered.

All the best

*Willow*

[pink&grey]

Sometimes psychotic you are spot on. If the voices, or any other symptom are not negatively effecting her, then meds aren't appropriate. There are many pDocs who will not even ask before handing out pills.

[punkybrewster6k]

I would also suggest that you try to keep her life as stress free as possible. That is very important as stress causes symptoms. Also, plenty of sleep also helps. If sleep deprived, symptoms get worse.

Sent from my SCH-S720C using Tapatalk 2

[nbritton]

She should not be on Prozac. If she has bipolar or a psychotic disorder prozac, and antidepressants in general, can actually make her condition worse. Leave her on the antipsychotic, but take her off the antidepressant. Any mental health professional worth their salt knows that antidepressants should not be used as a first line treatment for bipolar disorder and psychotic disorders.

Please consider consulting a childhood schizophrenia expert.

[nbritton]

Furthermore, she may actually like the imaginary friends of hers. This could possibly explain her resistance towards taking the new medication, because she was told the new medication will make them go away.

That or she's faking it, but honestly I don't see a 14yo going to that extreme. However, a clinical psychologist will be able to tell you in short order if she is merely doing this for attention. Regardless, she should be seeing a psychologist for therapy, like on a weekly basis until things get under control.

[faerie_moon_x]

I had two very specific imaginary friends as a kid, with a very specific back story and everything. They were twin brother and sister. They were so realistic some of my teachers asked my mom if I had siblings, which I didn't. This was no seen as anything other than normal childhood behavior. I talked to them all the time and even cried once because my uncle sat on one of them, since he couldn't see them in the chair. They stuck with me for a long time. I think I finally let them go just before entering junior high.

[Erti]

Originally Posted by nbritton

She should not be on Prozac. If she has bipolar or a psychotic disorder prozac, and antidepressants in general, can actually make her condition worse. Leave her on the antipsychotic, but take her off the antidepressant. Any mental health professional worth their salt knows that antidepressants should not be used as a first line treatment for bipolar disorder and psychotic disorders.

Please consider consulting a childhood schizophrenia expert.

Not necessarily. At least not for Depression w/ psychotic features or Schizoaffective disorder. I have psychosis and I'm on an anti-depressant.

[pink&grey]

Originally Posted by nbritton

She should not be on Prozac. If she has bipolar or a psychotic disorder prozac, and antidepressants in general, can actually make her condition worse. Leave her on the antipsychotic, but take her off the antidepressant. Any mental health professional worth their salt knows that antidepressants should not be used as a first line treatment for bipolar disorder and psychotic disorders.

Please consider consulting a childhood schizophrenia expert.

It's not this simple. I'm bipolar and lived on ADs for years, although that didn't turn out too well However, I could not simply take a mood stabilizer now without an AD. I'd be either depressed or super manic. It's a balance in my circumstance. I think I'm about 175 zoloft and 100 Lamictal....albeit I'm still slightly crazy, I'm not stuck in my bed nor am I convinced that the next trip to Mexico to start a new life and business without my kids is the answer....if you get what I mean.

[Victoria'smom]

As some one that at times gets paranoid that the doctors are purposely trying to make me sick and fat with meds it's her concerns and her voices are very real. She and the voices need to have as much control over her treatment because mental illness is scary and you feel out of control. When things are really bad for me my husband will wake me up in the middle of the night with a drink and my meds. That way I'm to tired for my ED voice to kick in. My doctors work on making it so I know the voice is lying. I even got a tattoo to try to remind myself what I need to do when I can't understand English.

[jeppys]

keeping an extremely open mind is part of what will see you and your daughter through this, that includes "new approaches". I have even looked into the spiritual, which for me seems to be where "it's" at even though I buck the idea like a bronco. if it is answers that you are looking for they will be tough to come by. the best thing I can recommend is to have very close, non-judgemental and supportive conversations about the content of the conversations that she has with her voices. priority wise for me this seems the absolute most important thing you can do......ABOVE ALL ELSE........know what's going on inside her. make it a point to clarify the difference between COMMAND voices and non command voices. command voices can instruct the individual to do very unpleasant things and believe when I say it can be very sudden. pay attention to her emotional state, in particular impatience, anger, frustration and emotional distance. these can be a sign that her conversations aren't going well inside and can indicate your assistance. also if she were using this as a crutch it would likely be for med seeking and since she turned away the resperidol at the request of the voices (common) it just doesn't seem probable.

[pink&grey]

Just swinging by to check in on this post and see the OP hasn't commented. If you are out there MrRacer, give us an update! On both you and your daughter. I hope knowing you are not alone helps a bit.