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Default Aug 26, 2015 at 01:24 PM
  #41
Watching old Friday the 13th movies

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Default Aug 26, 2015 at 01:49 PM
  #42
home from my moms. had a hard night there. some weird stuff happened. which caused me to feel suicidal. havent felt that way in a while. it was different though... i didnt feel like i wanted to kill myself right then. but i was making plans like setting a date to do it. and i felt really calm about it. i woke up this morning and was a little scared about that. T said we can talk about overwhelm and how to manage it.

today my plan is to complete my homework. i have a lot of hours at work again. i go back tomorrow 9 -4 manning self checkout. they are low on front end employees and are in the process of interviewing cashiers/baggers. so that is why i am getting a lot of hours. also the teens went back to school so they dont have a lot of ppl to work the day shift. i am supposed to not work over 20 hours in a week, but i have 26 this week. the paycheck is nice, but it takes a toll on me.

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Default Aug 26, 2015 at 01:53 PM
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Somehow I was under the impression that you were still having symptoms...is it mostly voices? If so are you just going to be OK with a certain amount of symptoms?
Yes I still hear voices but that is it pretty much... they don't bother me very much anymore since they are very quiet. I feel it's something I can live with.

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Default Aug 26, 2015 at 02:22 PM
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Default Aug 26, 2015 at 02:31 PM
  #45
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how are u doing?

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Default Aug 26, 2015 at 02:40 PM
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Just had some macaroni cheese for dinner.

What's everyone up to today? I'm just re-watching the X-Files... forgotten how much I enjoyed it.
I love mac n cheese, I literally eat it almost every single day. Is it healthy? No, but better than when I used to barely eat at all.

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Default Aug 26, 2015 at 02:55 PM
  #47
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how are u doing?

I'm okay. Just thinking a lot. How are you doing?

[-- possible trigger --]
Possible trigger:

[-- end possible trigger --]


On a brighter note, I went to my MHMR meeting and my doctors appointment isn't until my birthday. Nov 6. The lady said in one year, I'll be living independently and they'll help with all furnishings. And to start classes at school. I have very high doubts but we'll see. The lady said they'll cover all of my medication costs. So maybe I can get back on the antidepressant that did the best for me but cost almost $100 with my dads federal insurance that's really good. So, we'll see.

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Last edited by TheWell; Aug 27, 2015 at 03:50 PM.. Reason: added trigger code
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Default Aug 26, 2015 at 04:51 PM
  #48
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I'm okay. Just thinking a lot. How are you doing?

[-- possible trigger --]
Possible trigger:

[-- end possible trigger --]


On a brighter note, I went to my MHMR meeting and my doctors appointment isn't until my birthday. Nov 6. The lady said in one year, I'll be living independently and they'll help with all furnishings. And to start classes at school. I have very high doubts but we'll see. The lady said they'll cover all of my medication costs. So maybe I can get back on the antidepressant that did the best for me but cost almost $100 with my dads federal insurance that's really good. So, we'll see.

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wow, that is really scary. i am glad your boyfriend was there. the MHMR sounds nice. those are good goals to have. i hope it all works out and you are able to find some relief.

i am doing ok today. i bought a decal of a fox wearing glasses and i put it in my bedroom. it looks cool.

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Default Aug 26, 2015 at 04:53 PM
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wow, that is really scary. i am glad your boyfriend was there. the MHMR sounds nice. those are good goals to have. i hope it all works out and you are able to find some relief.


i am doing ok today. i bought a decal of a fox wearing glasses and i put it in my bedroom. it looks cool.

Thank you. And oooo. If I ever have my own place, it'll be Harry Potter themed.

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Default Aug 26, 2015 at 07:58 PM
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How a Computer Predicts Schizophrenia and Psychosis - The Atlantic

Check this out, apparently computers can now determine with a high degree of accuracy whether you will develop psychosis just by analyzing the way you talk. Kind of creepy actually....

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Default Aug 26, 2015 at 08:11 PM
  #51
I got that damn song stuck in my head the bass part lol I saw the oak ridge boys at the state fair


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Default Aug 27, 2015 at 02:00 AM
  #52
I want to stop taking my medicine because I feel better, but I have to remind myself that it's the medicine making me better...

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Default Aug 27, 2015 at 04:32 AM
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I want to stop taking my medicine because I feel better, but I have to remind myself that it's the medicine making me better...
People with Schizophrenia and Bipolar are famous for going off meds when they feel better (because of the meds), and then having little insight when they sink into psychosis or mania.

Right now my daughter is doing that and it is breaking my heart to watch it. She is convinced at the moment that she can control her bipolar with diet and exercise alone. She can't even see how manic she is. I'm so worried about where this will lead. So please, for the sake of yourself and all who love you, don't go off your meds because you feel good.

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Default Aug 27, 2015 at 04:59 AM
  #54
**** everything. I'm so exhausted. I don't want to deal with anything anymore. I'm only 23. This is the rest of my life. Hallucinations, depressed and suicidal. What kind of life is that?

I'm so so tired of dealing with everything. I give up. Whatever happens, happens.

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Default Aug 27, 2015 at 05:06 AM
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**** everything. I'm so exhausted. I don't want to deal with anything anymore. I'm only 23. This is the rest of my life. Hallucinations, depressed and suicidal. What kind of life is that?

I'm so so tired of dealing with everything. I give up. Whatever happens, happens.

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Default Aug 27, 2015 at 05:31 AM
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What do you mean? Are you going to do something you shouldn't?

No. I'm just so ****ing tired of everything. It never ends. Anything that helps is illegal and says it causes my diagnosis to begin with. Big pharma and tobacco and alcohol would never let a plant be legal because they're not making direct profit off of them. They want us blind so they see what they're really going to see inside when they finally escape us and release into him. The one who contradicts us. They're coming.

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Default Aug 27, 2015 at 06:13 AM
  #57
If I'm not mistaken... Happy Birthday newtus!!

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Default Aug 27, 2015 at 06:18 AM
  #58
Yes! Happy birthday Newtus! Have a great year!
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Default Aug 27, 2015 at 06:21 AM
  #59
happy bday newt!

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Default Aug 27, 2015 at 06:21 AM
  #60
getting ready to head off to work

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