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The Dopamine Flux
Member Since Jun 2010
Location: Ardenweald
Posts: 43,644
(SuperPoster!)
14 867 hugs
given 
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Oct 16, 2015 at 09:52 PM
#1
Hey everybody
 Let's vent.
__________________ "We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"
The Dopamine Flux www.thedopamineflux.com Youtube channel https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII |
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 Angelique67, Atypical_Disaster
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Legendary
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 11,326
(SuperPoster!)
9 499 hugs
given
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Oct 16, 2015 at 10:07 PM
#2
First!
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Schizoaffective, PTSD, Anxiety
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Atypical_Disaster
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Legendary
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 11,326
(SuperPoster!)
9 499 hugs
given
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Oct 16, 2015 at 10:08 PM
#3
I have lots to vent about but I'm trying to end my night on a high note. **** I took 2 Ativans and 2 ambiens I should be sleeping
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Schizoaffective, PTSD, Anxiety
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 Anonymous50123, Atypical_Disaster, avlady, Blue_Bird, Door2015
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Oct 16, 2015 at 11:33 PM
#4
My psychiatrist said I can lower my Stelazine dose and I can stop taking it soon!
I want to not take anymore medications. I am trying not to be paranoid, but my phone screen is flickering and I think someone may have traced my phone and the signal from the tracking device is conflicting with the way the phone regularly functions and that's causing my screen to flicker. Sometimes I want to become an exorcist. |
| Atypical_Disaster, avlady
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Atypical_Disaster
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Magnate
Member Since May 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 2,663
11 28 hugs
given
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Oct 17, 2015 at 02:48 AM
#5
Really low. Just oppressive darkness everywhere. Still paranoid but gaining insight. Bf phoned cpn because I feel like I used to when I would self harm. But I'm not going to.
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| Atypical_Disaster, avlady, korilakkuma, Loial
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El Psy Congroo
Member Since Aug 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 5,502
10 4,690 hugs
given
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Oct 17, 2015 at 03:39 AM
#6
Quote:
 I'm glad you are gaining more insight into your psychosis though, it can make a real difference in coping with things. __________________   "To travel hopefully is a better thing than to arrive." Robert Louis Stevenson  |
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| avlady
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ofthevalley
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Magnate
Member Since May 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 2,663
11 28 hugs
given
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Oct 17, 2015 at 03:53 AM
#7
Quote:
Thank you. Yes it's less scary to think it's not real than to believe all the thoughts. I'm battling with myself on what is real and not real. Sometimes one wins sometimes the other. I get this feeling when it gets really bad that I need to get out somehow. Previously this is when I've hurt myself or taken an od. It's like an intense feeling of fear and frustration and pressure. My bf thinks it's a build up of stress and tension which might make sense. It makes me want to run. Maybe it's my fight or flight response kicking in and my instinct is to run. I get really agitated and bad urges. Can anyone relate to this? |
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| Atypical_Disaster, avlady
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 22,125
(SuperPoster!)
10
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Oct 17, 2015 at 04:25 AM
#8
I'm up at 5. I went to bed pretty early last night! Hope everyone is OK.
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| Atypical_Disaster, avlady
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Atypical_Disaster, Loial
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The Dopamine Flux
Member Since Jun 2010
Location: Ardenweald
Posts: 43,644
(SuperPoster!)
14 867 hugs
given
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Oct 17, 2015 at 04:28 AM
#9
im up too. with my cold.
__________________ "We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"
The Dopamine Flux www.thedopamineflux.com Youtube channel https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII |
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| Atypical_Disaster, avlady
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Angelique67
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Grand Member
Member Since Jul 2014
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 849
10 119 hugs
given |
Oct 17, 2015 at 04:32 AM
#10
Hi Justme. I agree with Loial it sounds like youre gaining much more insight into your condition and thats key to staying healthy. Can you actually go running or exercising to alleviate the agitation? Would be great if that works.
Ive noticed in my last few episodes that I feel very agitated which almost always mnaifests in a need "fix" some perceived problem real or imaginary. This almost always involves tackling some issue in a professional relationship and it rarely goes well. Luckily this hasnt been happening while on meds or at least ive come to recognize it and not act on it so it hasnt been much of an issue recently but i lost a few good relationships to it over the years. |
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| Atypical_Disaster, avlady
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Atypical_Disaster, justmeandmyhead
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The Dopamine Flux
Member Since Jun 2010
Location: Ardenweald
Posts: 43,644
(SuperPoster!)
14 867 hugs
given
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Oct 17, 2015 at 05:25 AM
#11
Quote:
how are you? __________________ "We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"
The Dopamine Flux www.thedopamineflux.com Youtube channel https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII |
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Angelique67
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 22,125
(SuperPoster!)
10
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Oct 17, 2015 at 05:31 AM
#12
Quote:
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The Dopamine Flux
Member Since Jun 2010
Location: Ardenweald
Posts: 43,644
(SuperPoster!)
14 867 hugs
given
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Oct 17, 2015 at 05:35 AM
#13
no my cold is still bad. if not worse.
__________________ "We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"
The Dopamine Flux www.thedopamineflux.com Youtube channel https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII |
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| Atypical_Disaster, Door2015
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The Dopamine Flux
Member Since Jun 2010
Location: Ardenweald
Posts: 43,644
(SuperPoster!)
14 867 hugs
given
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Oct 17, 2015 at 05:35 AM
#14
how are you neil?
__________________ "We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"
The Dopamine Flux www.thedopamineflux.com Youtube channel https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 22,125
(SuperPoster!)
10
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Oct 17, 2015 at 05:53 AM
#15
Quote:
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Grand Member
Member Since Jul 2014
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 849
10 119 hugs
given |
Oct 17, 2015 at 06:29 AM
#16
Quote:
hope you feel better with your cold, it just makes everything else worse. |
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| Atypical_Disaster, Door2015
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Oct 17, 2015 at 06:43 AM
#17
Hey newtus: I don't know how to quote from previous topics, soz. It's a pity you don't have a decent forum to talk with other students for college, you should really be able to talk about what you think is important. Regarding torrents you can download a program called bitTorrent, then download an actual torrent online that will download through that program. Most sites like KickAssTorrents and PirateBay are blocked by my ISP so I don't bother anymore, but if you can get access it might be worth looking for your book. You use a macbook so the chances of you getting a virus or any malware is like <0.01%, I made that figure up but I've been torrenting for about 7 years on a macbook and never had a problem... at all. On my Windows computer, I wouldn't dream of downloading a torrent.
I hope you find a solution, it'd be a shame to give up on a class when something is out of your control. Especially something like English, I would imagine that class would help greatly for something like Philosophy. Good luck with it. |
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Comfy Sedation
Member Since Sep 2012
Location: the woods
Posts: 19,304
(SuperPoster!)
12 8,152 hugs
given
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Oct 17, 2015 at 06:47 AM
#18
good morning guys
the store manager told me he wants me to be a bookkeeper. this scared me. part of me wants to say OK ill do it. part of me is too scared!!! it just seems really dumb not to do it though. i am not sure what to do. i see T today, i will talk about it with him. i texted him about it yesterday when i was at work and he got all excited. of course he will want me to do it. my mom does too. i feel very not normal. bc i cant accept a promotion and see it as a good thing. i see it through my lens of fear and anxiety, and it seems like a terrible thing that i need to escape from. i was even thinking that i should become a crap employee so they will leave me a lone.... omg that is nonsense. __________________ 
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| Atypical_Disaster, Gr3tta, Sometimes psychotic
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Oct 17, 2015 at 06:49 AM
#19
Today is the day I was supposed to graduate with my honors degree from college. Years in planning this was the date that I would have finally accomplished something big. I've finished plenty of little things like a Higher Certificate (or an Associates Degree to the Americans) and a stupified leaving school exams designed for trouble makers. This was supposed to be it, no on ever thought I'd make it, and I didn't. Going to be a little bit sad today looking through all the lads pictures on facebook. Not envious, these guys did what I couldn't and I commend them for it. A great bunch of lads they are, it's a pity I won't be out partying, celebrating with them tonight. Such a shame. Mental illness is not a joke, and it's nothing to be underestimated. But I'm getting there, slowly but surely.
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| Anonymous37841, Atypical_Disaster, Gr3tta, junkDNA, Sometimes psychotic
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Legendary
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 11,326
(SuperPoster!)
9 499 hugs
given
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Oct 17, 2015 at 07:44 AM
#20
Touring high schools today. Can't believe my son will be going to high school in 2 years
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Schizoaffective, PTSD, Anxiety
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