[x123]

Several years ago a therapist diagnosed me with a very mild case of delusional disorder ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delusional_disorder ).

Whenever I think too much, it makes me almost feel like crying or hiding in the closet. I don't know why I have these feelings, because it all happened five years ago.

So I wondered if anybody else has been told they have "delusional disorder". Maybe my silliness would make sense to that person. IDK

My psychiatrist first thought I either had a mild case of schizophrenia or delusional disorder. Then he witnessed my decline, my depression, my panic attacks, my anxiety attacks then bi polar came and ever since bi polar I haven't been the same. I don't have the discipline as I use to have except for my passion.

I don't get hallucinations, just horrible delusions that are attached by suicidal depression.

Finally he called it schizoaffective. My new pdoc things I may have Bipolar1 only, a severe case of it, but whatever, I have schizoaffective.

[x123]

Originally Posted by 0dysseus

My psychiatrist first thought I either had a mild case of schizophrenia or delusional disorder. Then he witnessed my decline, my depression, my panic attacks, my anxiety attacks then bi polar came and ever since bi polar I haven't been the same. I don't have the discipline as I use to have except for my passion.

I don't get hallucinations, just horrible delusions that are attached by suicidal depression.

Finally he called it schizoaffective. My new pdoc things I may have Bipolar1 only, a severe case of it, but whatever, I have schizoaffective.

From reading about delusional disorder, one difference seems to be high functionality. Usually people with psychosis act strangely and everybody can tell there is something wrong. People with delusional disorder seem normal except for some delusional belief.

Is has been difficult to accept that my hallucinations were not reality. I was very normal. I was trying to think about these hallucinations yesterday, and I suddenly felt all shaky and upset, so I stopped thinking about them.

I don't hear other people on this forum talking about the types of problems that I experience. Everybody seems to accept that none of it actually happened. I can't decide what happened and what didn't happen, and it upsets me and scares me. So I thought maybe it is because I have something more like delusional disorder. IDK

[Loial]

Originally Posted by x123

I don't hear other people on this forum talking about the types of problems that I experience. Everybody seems to accept that none of it actually happened. I can't decide what happened and what didn't happen, and it upsets me and scares me.

Trust me, we've all been there but I think most of us regular posters are stable at the moment largely speaking.

I certainly remember it being quite distressing not knowing whether I could trust my own thoughts or not.

Even to this day, I'm still not sure whether some of what I thought was going on was real or not. I think because I believed in them so firmly at the time, it's just part of my memory now.

It's not so much I still believe them, rather that I can't sort out what parts were real during that period, to what wasn't. It's just all one big messy memory.

[x123]

Originally Posted by Loial

Trust me, we've all been there but I think most of us regular posters are stable at the moment largely speaking.

I certainly remember it being quite distressing not knowing whether I could trust my own thoughts or not.

Even to this day, I'm still not sure whether some of what I thought was going on was real or not. I think because I believed in them so firmly at the time, it's just part of my memory now.

It's not so much I still believe them, rather that I can't sort out what parts were real during that period, to what wasn't. It's just all one big messy memory.

Exactly. I can't decide what was hallucination and what wasn't hallucination in some cases. It was such a smooth transition sometimes, that I don't know where reality stopped and hallucination began.

Also, I sometimes think there was something weird going on in addition to my own hallucinations. But that's just the way it is - just a big messy memory LOL

[justmeandmyhead]

I was originally diagnosed with delusional disorder but my psychiatrist changed it to schizophrenia when I told him the extent of my symptoms and he saw me when I was ill.
I have times when I've been ill in the past that I can't figure out what was real and what wasn't. Some of it is obviously not because it's very bizarre, but other stuff could have happened it's just unlikely

[12AM]

Originally Posted by Loial

Trust me, we've all been there but I think most of us regular posters are stable at the moment largely speaking.

I certainly remember it being quite distressing not knowing whether I could trust my own thoughts or not.

Even to this day, I'm still not sure whether some of what I thought was going on was real or not. I think because I believed in them so firmly at the time, it's just part of my memory now.

It's not so much I still believe them, rather that I can't sort out what parts were real during that period, to what wasn't. It's just all one big messy memory.

Yes, the bold text is so true, at least for me. I wouldn’t find myself here typing when I am really unstable.

Originally Posted by x123

Exactly. I can't decide what was hallucination and what wasn't hallucination in some cases. It was such a smooth transition sometimes, that I don't know where reality stopped and hallucination began

I’ve got a constant delusion that every single time I don’t trust my own thoughts. You are not alone