Roll call 80

I'm going out to a board game club later. Looking forward to it but nervous.

Dreading my grocery delivery. :/ I didn't get much food. Just some cereals, and bread, and a lot of juice. Oh and my coffee. That's why I had to order for today, running out of coffee.

That sounds like fun! I hope it will be.

Can't risk running out of coffee. After all it is the nectar of the gods. I haven't had nearly enough today. May be making another pot.

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Schizoaffective, PTSD, Anxiety

Thanks!!!!

I don't really like coffee but I love tea.

Me too, but I'd want to take a nap. Wish I could.

I made my 2nd pot. Only 6 cups though so not too bad.

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Schizoaffective, PTSD, Anxiety

If it wouldn't affect my anxiety I'd be doing that too lol. My order came, and I think I put away all the fridge and freezer stuff, and I feel like a weight has just been lifted. I'll have to thank my neighbor (one of the nice ones) for keeping the door open for the driver. When I next see her. Given my avoidance of the stairs, that may be awhile.

Oh, I'll have to look for the bleach. Didn't see it yet and I need it to clean the sink, since I had to use the toilet plunger on the drain last week.

im still pretty low. i dont know why it matters to post it here. i feel really pointless... my whole existence... is pointless. now im scaring people,..people are worried...my mom and T. and now my roommate bc hse asked me if i am OK, and i said ... no. and she said did i do something wrong? i said no its not you. she asked do i wanna talk about it. "no i dont want to talk about it". she left. iam a piece of ****

What triggered this? If you know, you might be able to know what you should do with it. Have you told your t about it?

He knows. I haven't been eating and I had a flashback which I talked some about with my therapist. It dredged a lot of stuff up and I am failing to cope.

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I'm sorry junk

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Schizoaffective, PTSD, Anxiety

I'm not feeling great tonight. My head is loud and my tolerance for it is low.

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Schizoaffective, PTSD, Anxiety

Riding out the urge.to SH, still very paranoid thoughts, can't get rid of them, still.hearing voices, idk if I can get my meds.refilled this week cause idk if Medicaid dropped my Dads insurance plan from their system, and my pharmacy can't do another override to.cover my meds through Medicaid, since Medicaid still thinks I have united as my primary insurance, but I was dropped from Untied and all my meds.were.covered under Medicaid anyways, and I don't have the money to pay for them out of pocket especially my AP (I'm on a high dose of, Abilify 20mg, if I have to stop withdrawal will suck), which is the more important one as it treats both my depression and hallucinations (mostly voices), ugh I think In screwed, going to try and call Medicaid tomorrow (if I don't forget) and see if the request they put in on July 8th went through or not. Idk at least I'm able to recognize my symptoms, but afraid of having to ride them out, well the hallucinations, I know I have to ride out the paranoid thinking, which sucks...ugh I'm so.screwed.

Sorry for the long post, my thinking is all over the place.tonight, took a couple of sleeping pills to calm me.down and hopefully knock me out...

Morning all, I woke up fairly early today, don't remember going to sleep last night. Feel pretty refreshed though, which is nice.

I'm sorry. I hope it will get less intensely bad really soon.

I hope everyone will feel better today. I fell asleep last night in either the 8 or 9 hour. Very glad I didn't sleep any later.

I did a thing.



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