[VernonJenkins]

I don't know how to rationalize this because it's a paradox, but I'm delusional and I know it. Delusions are making me miserable and so far, medication hasn't helped. I'm getting worse and worse.

I'm sorry that you're struggling.

Technically, you can't know that you're being delusional. By their very definition, you believe delusions to be 100% true. You can have overvalued ideas, which you suspect might be a little 'off' logically, but you still believe a lot, which is kind of the step below a full delusion.

Anyway, regardless of what you want to call it, in what way are they making you miserable? What medication are you on, and for how long? Are you looking for coping strategies for dealing with them? Or advice for a different medication to try? Or something else? Just curious as to how we could help you with this experience...

*Willow*

When i was in the psychward i was open to the possibility, and i felt like the psychward was giving me hope, and i believed in that hope that i would get better because i couldn't sink any lower without killing myself. Quite the tug-o-war between reality and psychosis. From my experience, you can't fight the delusion forever, you will sink into it completely again at some point. It's like the weight lifter if can't put the thing down, at some point he has to out of exhaustion. Meds aren't working great, but a good therapist that actively challenges you can be a god send too.

(hugs)

[NOS-NOS]

Medication alone did not help me break free of my delusions. I also had to switch to a better therapist as well as add another medication. Even though I broke free, I feel that there is still a trail of breadcrumbs left in my mind that can lead me back to where I was mentally if I am not careful. But upping the meds basically blocks that type of thinking for the most part, for me at least. It took some years though, I've been medicated for 9 years now

[jvklaus]

**I don't know how to do the trigger thing, so this might have a trigger**

I think there is a fine line between delusion and reality. It is possible to have delusional thinking and know it's delusional. Yesterday I kept feeling like someone was watching me, like my TV was a viewing screen and people were watching me. I also knew that it couldn't possibly be, but that did not change the creepy feeling I had of being watched. Things get difficult with hallucinations though. Sometimes I cannot tell the difference between hallucination and reality, especially tactile hallucinations. It is only after things have subsided that I can rationalize it; but, even then it's difficult. Was it real? It felt real, but how could it be? I don't know. So how do I know if what I am experiencing is real if even afterwards I second guess it? I try to keep to myself, and even though I've had to move in my with mother and had to move across the country to do so, I still don't tell her what's going on. I only tell my psychiatrist. She knows when things aren't good, but I lie. I don't want to tell her. How can she understand. I am supposed to be smart. She says I am, and if I tell her more about my experience she will not think that anymore and then she will be disappointed. I couldn't finish my PhD, my schizophrenia got too bad. I listened to the voices and tried to kill myself so God would be happy; after my friend found me and called 911, I woke up in the hospital and after that they sent me to the psych hospital and they told me God didn't want me to die. They said it wasn't real, but it was real to me. So if it's real to me, is it a delusion or is it reality? Isn't reality nothing more than our perception of life? I don't know.

[Dan Raleigh]

VernonJenkins, The cause of delusions are due to meaningful interactions with things that suppose to be a coincidence. May I know what kind of delusions that you are having?

[Dan Raleigh]

I'm opening up a thread with regard to delusions, I think you all should read it. It's a true experience that I had and I'm trying to raise an awareness of it.