Roll Call 180

cogladaid · Mar 03, 2021 at 06:15 PM

Oh, and my psychologist convinced me I should try to shower twice a week. And look for alternates to self harming. It's been creeping up because of my mood. Hopefully it goes away with a balanced mood.

SlumberKitty · Mar 03, 2021 at 06:19 PM

I called my Mom to see what was for dinner to decide whether or not I should eat a banana for a snack. Lol! My Mom was like why are you calling me a half hour before you get off of work? Lol!

SlumberKitty · Mar 03, 2021 at 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cogladaid

Oh, and my psychologist convinced me I should try to shower twice a week. And look for alternates to self harming. It's been creeping up because of my mood. Hopefully it goes away with a balanced mood.

Hopefully it goes away with a balanced mood. Otherwise you might need to bulk up on your coping skills toolbox. I've been reading more which helps me be distracted from thoughts that make me want to self harm. Listening to music. Going for a walk in the park. Texting friends. Doing artwork.

Blue_Bird · Mar 03, 2021 at 06:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

I called my Mom to see what was for dinner to decide whether or not I should eat a banana for a snack. Lol! My Mom was like why are you calling me a half hour before you get off of work? Lol!

What's for dinner?

SlumberKitty · Mar 03, 2021 at 06:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

What's for dinner?

Porkchops, salad, and either carrots or broccoli.

SlumberKitty · Mar 03, 2021 at 06:27 PM

And yes, I ate the banana. I calculated my calories for the day and decided I would have enough calories left for the banana. That's good because I was hungry!

cogladaid · Mar 03, 2021 at 06:27 PM

My mom made pork tamales.

SlumberKitty · Mar 03, 2021 at 06:28 PM

I'm doing Noom. It's like a weight loss App. So you have to track how much stuff you eat and how often you eat and all this stuff. It's helping me eat healthier though. Before I would have grabbed a granola bar or something. Similar amount of calories but the granola bar is far less healthy for me.

SlumberKitty · Mar 03, 2021 at 06:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cogladaid

My mom made pork tamales.

Must be a night for Pork!

SlumberKitty · Mar 03, 2021 at 06:31 PM

Yeah! Time to get off of work!

Desoxyn · Mar 03, 2021 at 06:35 PM

I'm so much better I am in terms of negative symptoms (If that's what they are).

Like I'm actually doing things now, consuming information and applying knowledge, understanding myself and world, being more social and talking more, able to watch full movies, working, making steps to becoming independent like learning how to cook and getting my drivers license, showering every 1-2 days and other general hygiene like brushing my teeth every day, doing chores every day, sleeping well, trying to take up new hobbies, no psychosis...

I think it's mostly the Vyvanse and olanzepine on top of the bad trip 4 years ago. That's when I started getting better..

I'm going to tell my doctor this and see if he prescribes Dexedrine boosters for focusing on online courses. I just don't think he realizes how much better I'm doing - My psychiatrist said I could have 1-2 a day if the Vyvanse isn't enough so idk my doctor is getting annoyed with me wanting to change my meds.

Desoxyn · Mar 03, 2021 at 06:43 PM

I don't know what the hell I'm doing though. I'm in doubt. People try to help me but no one knows what I want. I don't know what I want. But I have a better idea of it than them.

I just wish I wasn't in such existential crisis. I blame the video chat people.

cogladaid · Mar 03, 2021 at 08:40 PM

Watching TV and on this episode of New Amsterdam this pilot crashed a plane in the water and doesn’t remember it and he was hiding bipolar and was diagnosed previously because he had a manic episode and thought he could control the plane and the world with his mind.

Just like AWKWARD watching with my mom hahahaha.

cogladaid · Mar 03, 2021 at 09:08 PM

Crossed my mind: what if I can control things with my mind??

cogladaid · Mar 03, 2021 at 09:29 PM

I’m getting sleepy. I should be able to sleep well tonight. Tomorrow is Thursday which means it’s almost Friday. Almost the weekend.

Got a bit of progress on an assignment for my C++ course. Got to figure out what I’m doing step by step.

cogladaid · Mar 03, 2021 at 10:14 PM

Possible trigger:

Lately intrusive thoughts pop in my head telling me to take all my pills. I don’t feel suicidal but the thoughts come up sometimes.

I didn’t think to tell my psychologist or my doctor for fear they’ll think I am suicidal and lock me up.

Desoxyn · Mar 04, 2021 at 01:23 AM

Big crisis about existing for me

newtus · Mar 04, 2021 at 01:30 AM

Two hot dogs for a midnight snack

Lmao

newtus · Mar 04, 2021 at 08:20 AM

Took my medicine at night last night instead of yesterday morning.

2 hours after taking it, I felt completely content and ok and at ease, not tired. So I was up til 3am just vibin to music and playing The Witcher 3 rpg on Xbox. Had no sadness and no overt amount of energy. I was just real good. Well actually I went to bed at like 4am. Woke up at 6:05am. I still feel pretty good. 2nd night I got a couple of hours of sleep in the middle of the night.

Hoping to get my sleep schedule reversed and back on track within the next week or two.

Also, my dad came over yesterday and we ordered in with barbecue and watched YouTube together for a bit and then he went back home. We had fun. So glad he came out to spend time with me

love him

cogladaid · Mar 04, 2021 at 09:14 AM

I still feel really chatty but my thoughts feel slower. Not racing like they were. Feeling restless still. Hopefully I’ll be able to focus and get my work done today.

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cogladaid Elder Member Since Jul 2015 Location: Nowhere Posts: 5,565 8	Mar 03, 2021 at 06:15 PM #641 Oh, and my psychologist convinced me I should try to shower twice a week. And look for alternates to self harming. It's been creeping up because of my mood. Hopefully it goes away with a balanced mood.
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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	Mar 03, 2021 at 06:19 PM #642 I called my Mom to see what was for dinner to decide whether or not I should eat a banana for a snack. Lol! My Mom was like why are you calling me a half hour before you get off of work? Lol! __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	Mar 03, 2021 at 06:27 PM #646 And yes, I ate the banana. I calculated my calories for the day and decided I would have enough calories left for the banana. That's good because I was hungry! __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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cogladaid Elder Member Since Jul 2015 Location: Nowhere Posts: 5,565 8	Mar 03, 2021 at 06:27 PM #647 My mom made pork tamales.
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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	Mar 03, 2021 at 06:28 PM #648 I'm doing Noom. It's like a weight loss App. So you have to track how much stuff you eat and how often you eat and all this stuff. It's helping me eat healthier though. Before I would have grabbed a granola bar or something. Similar amount of calories but the granola bar is far less healthy for me. __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	Mar 03, 2021 at 06:31 PM #650 Yeah! Time to get off of work! __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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Desoxyn Metaphysic Member Since Aug 2016 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 12,980 (SuperPoster!) 7 4,908 hugs given	Mar 03, 2021 at 06:43 PM #652 I don't know what the hell I'm doing though. I'm in doubt. People try to help me but no one knows what I want. I don't know what I want. But I have a better idea of it than them. I just wish I wasn't in such existential crisis. I blame the video chat people.
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cogladaid Elder Member Since Jul 2015 Location: Nowhere Posts: 5,565 8	Mar 03, 2021 at 08:40 PM #653 Watching TV and on this episode of New Amsterdam this pilot crashed a plane in the water and doesn’t remember it and he was hiding bipolar and was diagnosed previously because he had a manic episode and thought he could control the plane and the world with his mind. Just like AWKWARD watching with my mom hahahaha.
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cogladaid Elder Member Since Jul 2015 Location: Nowhere Posts: 5,565 8	Mar 03, 2021 at 09:08 PM #654 Crossed my mind: what if I can control things with my mind??
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cogladaid Elder Member Since Jul 2015 Location: Nowhere Posts: 5,565 8	Mar 03, 2021 at 09:29 PM #655 I’m getting sleepy. I should be able to sleep well tonight. Tomorrow is Thursday which means it’s almost Friday. Almost the weekend. Got a bit of progress on an assignment for my C++ course. Got to figure out what I’m doing step by step.
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cogladaid Elder Member Since Jul 2015 Location: Nowhere Posts: 5,565 8	Mar 03, 2021 at 10:14 PM #656 Possible trigger: Lately intrusive thoughts pop in my head telling me to take all my pills. I don’t feel suicidal but the thoughts come up sometimes. I didn’t think to tell my psychologist or my doctor for fear they’ll think I am suicidal and lock me up.
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Desoxyn Metaphysic Member Since Aug 2016 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 12,980 (SuperPoster!) 7 4,908 hugs given	Mar 04, 2021 at 01:23 AM #657 Big crisis about existing for me
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newtus The Dopamine Flux Member Since Jun 2010 Location: Ardenweald Posts: 43,644 (SuperPoster!) 13 867 hugs given	Mar 04, 2021 at 01:30 AM #658 Two hot dogs for a midnight snack Lmao __________________ "We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living" The Dopamine Flux www.thedopamineflux.com Youtube channel https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII
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cogladaid Elder Member Since Jul 2015 Location: Nowhere Posts: 5,565 8	Mar 04, 2021 at 09:14 AM #660 I still feel really chatty but my thoughts feel slower. Not racing like they were. Feeling restless still. Hopefully I’ll be able to focus and get my work done today.
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