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Old 01-21-2022, 07:54 PM   #361
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

I want ketamine..

I also want my dx changed from "schizophrenia" to "ASD with psychosis"

Cuz Autism = ADHD and OCD

+ I'm not afraid of psychosis in the slightest. I get quasi-psychosis...

So thy lower thee antipsychotics

Enough of this "caught early" stuff.. Although being on the injection probably saved me from bad neuron pruning
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Old 01-21-2022, 08:30 PM   #362
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

Unless "schizophrenia" really is what I have. But I think it's much more complicated than some disease that doesn't heal and if you are cured, you never really had it.

I tried to understand.. But I don't.
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Old 01-21-2022, 08:46 PM   #363
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

I can't focus
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Old 01-21-2022, 10:14 PM   #364
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

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Originally Posted by Desoxyn View Post
Unless "schizophrenia" really is what I have. But I think it's much more complicated than some disease that doesn't heal and if you are cured, you never really had it.

I tried to understand.. But I don't.
Oh my goodness, you sound like I feel! It's so hard! I have the voices, but that doesn't make me whatever the so-called experts say I am.
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Old 01-21-2022, 10:20 PM   #365
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

My mind is organizing. I'm updating my notes and such and visualizing the things that I do.

It will take time...
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Old 01-21-2022, 10:22 PM   #366
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Oh my goodness, you sound like I feel! It's so hard! I have the voices, but that doesn't make me whatever the so-called experts say I am.
Voices didn't bother me. But psychiatrists wanted them gone - They were like "Nope! That's not normal..."

DP/DR voices/thoughts however did bother me. It was one of the worst things I've went through.
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Old 01-21-2022, 10:28 PM   #367
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

Auditory hallucinations, at least I perceive that I can hear them physically..

Dissociative voices(?) feel like I'm truly losing my mind and that reality/my mind isn't real.
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Old 01-21-2022, 10:40 PM   #368
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Auditory hallucinations, at least I perceive that I can hear them physically..

Dissociative voices(?) feel like I'm truly losing my mind and that reality/my mind isn't real.
But that's what I deal with every day all day long.
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Old 01-21-2022, 10:48 PM   #369
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

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But that's what I deal with every day all day long.
I'm sorry <3

Risperidone stopped my voices but I only heard 10-20 a day. It wasn't bad so idk what it's really like. ((Hugs))
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Old 01-21-2022, 11:04 PM   #370
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

I'm starting to feel better now..
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Old 01-21-2022, 11:11 PM   #371
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I'm sorry <3

Risperidone stopped my voices but I only heard 10-20 a day. It wasn't bad so idk what it's really like. ((Hugs))
Thank you! If only! I wish so much!
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Old Yesterday, 10:05 AM   #372
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

Iím sorry just everything is just annoying to me now. Like I spent years battling my mental health and I finally got to feeling under control and now what? I might have lymphoma?

Did some tests and have more tests to do so thereís no update on it but itís just been going around my head a lot lately.

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Old Yesterday, 01:34 PM   #373
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Iím sorry just everything is just annoying to me now. Like I spent years battling my mental health and I finally got to feeling under control and now what? I might have lymphoma?

Did some tests and have more tests to do so thereís no update on it but itís just been going around my head a lot lately.

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((HUGS)) Don't be too hard on yourself, you have a lot going on at the moment.
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Old Yesterday, 02:57 PM   #374
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

Quote:
Originally Posted by cogladaid View Post
Iím sorry just everything is just annoying to me now. Like I spent years battling my mental health and I finally got to feeling under control and now what? I might have lymphoma?

Did some tests and have more tests to do so thereís no update on it but itís just been going around my head a lot lately.

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Hugs cog my only advice is try not to worry until you know for sure.

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Old Yesterday, 07:22 PM   #375
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

Sorry cogladaid
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Old Yesterday, 07:23 PM   #376
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

I walked to Family Dollar earlier today and bought some food. Practiced ukulele for awhile tonight, I'm thinking of getting one of those hand/finger exerciser things to help my hands get stronger for playing.

I took a long nap with Stash today, it's always so cozy sleeping with her purring on me.

I'm a little anxious, but am trying to distract myself

Need to clean tomorrow.

Have been playing a lot of games

Have appointments with my psychiatrist and also my therapist next week, both over video. Not sure what I'm going to discuss. I kind of want to come off the trileptal but I've been on it for so damn long I don't know if it's worth bothering with coming off it or not if I'm doing okay.
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Old Yesterday, 10:00 PM   #377
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

I want to be at an airport, ready to fly away
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Old Yesterday, 10:37 PM   #378
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I'm sorry, Cogs ((hugs))
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Old Today, 01:05 AM   #379
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Default Re: Roll Call 190

I watched an episode on TV with my mom about mental health, ketamine and psilocybin. It was interesting.

I'm too tired to type about it though. I must sleep.. Work in the morning.
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Old Today, 10:42 AM   #380
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Idk why but I generally donít care much about my healthÖ.but now Iím sad about it because I have to change and because I need to see a doc and that wreaks havoc with my anxiety.

It snowed a fair amount last night. Just hoping it gets cleaned before work.

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