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Legendary Wise Elder
Blue_Bird
is ready for recovery!
Member Since: Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 36,661
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#441
Quote:
I can handle it I think, school. I just keep second guessing myself because of my history with it and I don't want to screw up again. I'll go back in January, I can do it __________________ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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downandlonely, Job 30 26, SlumberKitty, Sometimes psychotic
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Angelique67, downandlonely, Sometimes psychotic
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Legendary Wise Elder
Blue_Bird
is ready for recovery!
Member Since: Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 36,661
(SuperPoster!)
14.3k hugs
given |
#442
I feel kind of bad about myself sometimes because I feel like I should be able to handle stress, I have a really hard time with it. I know everyone does, it's just mental health struggles make it a bit more complicated and I just wish I could handle stress normally
__________________ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Desoxyn, downandlonely, SlumberKitty, Sometimes psychotic
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Legendary Wise Elder
Blue_Bird
is ready for recovery!
Member Since: Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 36,661
(SuperPoster!)
14.3k hugs
given |
#443
I mean I guess I'm making progress though, I almost cried when having a panic attack while volunteering during a lunch shift but I managed not to and pulled myself together without bolting out the door.
That's pretty huge progress because typically I would have just left if I were in a situation like that I just have to tell myself what's the worst that can happen, no one is going to yell at me, I may panic a little but it's not the end of the world and I can get through it. I got through it last time so if it happens again I'll be even better prepared and know I've made it through it before I guess maybe this is good exposure therapy __________________ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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SlumberKitty
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Angelique67, downandlonely
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Legendary Wise Elder
Angelique67
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Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 22,110
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#444
Quote:
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SlumberKitty
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Legendary Wise Elder
Angelique67
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 22,110
(SuperPoster!)
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#445
Quote:
Sent from my Nokia XR20 using Tapatalk |
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Blue_Bird, SlumberKitty
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Blue_Bird, downandlonely
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Legendary Wise Elder
Angelique67
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 22,110
(SuperPoster!)
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#446
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Blue_Bird, SlumberKitty
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Legendary Wise Elder
Sometimes psychotic
Typo queen !
Member Since: May 2013
Location: Chicago
Posts: 26,409
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#447
Quote:
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SlumberKitty
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Atypical_Disaster, Blue_Bird, downandlonely
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Legendary Wise Elder
Blue_Bird
is ready for recovery!
Member Since: Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 36,661
(SuperPoster!)
14.3k hugs
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#448
Quote:
Several things. Social, stress of assignments in general etc. But yeah I am taking the classes online Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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SlumberKitty
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Atypical_Disaster, downandlonely, Sometimes psychotic
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Legendary Wise Elder
Blue_Bird
is ready for recovery!
Member Since: Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 36,661
(SuperPoster!)
14.3k hugs
given |
#449
I feel better today, I slept some last night, probably not enough but better than the just 2 hours I slept the previous night
__________________ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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SlumberKitty, Sometimes psychotic
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Angelique67, Atypical_Disaster, downandlonely
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Elder
Atypical_Disaster
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Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Nowhere noteworthy.
Posts: 7,142
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#450
Quote:
Drama is inevitable, I’ve dealt with quite a bit of it elsewhere online lately. Thankfully it’s been easy to resolve. I disappeared for a lot of reasons, none of which were voluntary… I’ve missed being here and being able to chat with people who understand (at least in part) what I’m going through. Quote:
Quote:
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thank you all for the messages. I guess I’m not as easy to forget as I sometimes think I am. In a lot of ways I’m doing better but I still have rough days, and I’ve had a rough few weeks so yeah… figured I’d check in and say hi to some of my favorite people. |
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Blue_Bird, Desoxyn, Job 30 26, SlumberKitty, Sometimes psychotic
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Blue_Bird, Desoxyn, Job 30 26
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Legendary Wise Elder
Blue_Bird
is ready for recovery!
Member Since: Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 36,661
(SuperPoster!)
14.3k hugs
given |
#451
I don't feel good today, very anxious, panicky and also really tired for no reason (I slept fine the previous night) and I feel like I'm getting a sore throat. I also feel out of touch because I haven't actually talked to anyone in a couple days
__________________ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Desoxyn, Job 30 26, SlumberKitty
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Job 30 26
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Metaphysic
Desoxyn
We are one mind
Member Since: Aug 2016
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 12,962
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#452
Talking to autists through encrypted messages in my computer terminal is a trip.
Big forest fire sizzled the electricity wires. Power will be out for around a week. I always have feared power blackouts - Especially with this decaying, meth society full of clowns. I visited and had dinner with a cousin and her husband - They asked me questions.. and at the time (Before I took the olanzepine), I was feeling exactly like what BB is describing - Just massive anxiety and couldn't say much. It's quite horrible. I wonder if ket BDNF neuroplasticity could benefit with olanzepine.. Idk. I saw on the news, the culprit for a horrible event.. My mom said "He must have been on drugs" and I said "Drugs didn't do that to me..", she said "Thank God - Must be good genetics".. But like.. Don't I have schiz? It's nonsense. I'll visit with my dad tomorrow, we'll talk etc.. I hope that I won't have much cognitive impairment. I'm supposed to get the Invega Trinza injection tomorrow but I'll prolong it for a few days. I think most people (Including my parents) have worse mental health than I do. Although, in the past.. I was super, super handicapped from isolation. |
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SlumberKitty
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Angelique67, Atypical_Disaster
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Grand Poohbah
unsure123
has no updates.
Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: uk
Posts: 1,607
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#453
Hi everyone, hope you're all well. Just thought I'd drop in and say hello.
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SlumberKitty
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Angelique67, Desoxyn, Sometimes psychotic
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Metaphysic
Desoxyn
We are one mind
Member Since: Aug 2016
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 12,962
(SuperPoster!)
4,902 hugs
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#454
I never feel hungry for breakfast or lunch. With my dad, I'll drink an alcohol.
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SlumberKitty, Sometimes psychotic
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unsure123
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Member
sweatpantslounger
has no updates.
Member Since: Aug 2022
Location: Everywhere and nowhere
Posts: 50
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#455
Hello - I’m trying to see the forest through all the trees.
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SlumberKitty
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Sometimes psychotic, unsure123
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Legendary Wise Elder
SlumberKitty
is staying stable.
Member Since: Jul 2018
Location: CA
Posts: 27,329
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#456
__________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
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Angelique67, unsure123
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Legendary Wise Elder
SlumberKitty
is staying stable.
Member Since: Jul 2018
Location: CA
Posts: 27,329
(SuperPoster!)
117.7k hugs
given |
#457
Had to go get an x-ray of my neck yesterday. I've had shoulder pain for years and now I have numbness and tingling in my arm. I got the results in an email from the radiologist. I am trying to contact my Dr. but her out of office message is on, so probably someone did not switch the phones over from the answering service. Ugh. Likely she won't read the report until tonight though because that is when she usually catches up on all that stuff so maybe I will hear from her tomorrow. It sounds like my C5 and C6 are messed up.
__________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
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Grand Poohbah
unsure123
has no updates.
Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: uk
Posts: 1,607
45 hugs
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#458
The Queen just passed away
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SlumberKitty
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Angelique67, cogladaid
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Metaphysic
Desoxyn
We are one mind
Member Since: Aug 2016
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 12,962
(SuperPoster!)
4,902 hugs
given |
#459
The doctor that gave me the Invega injection was a ****. "Having any odd thoughts?" - Why does he even bother asking? He doesn't care. How many people have told me "Everyone else is going through the same thing" - Just cuz of the ****ing schiz diagnosis.
I wanted to KMS since I was a kid. Idk why I even asked for treatment. Nothing's changed. I was just too scared to do it - But I bet he WANTS me to KMS. And i bet all of those doctors talk about me. I had a good visit with my dad - I was feeling numb, cuz he was getting me to buy things on the computer and I was anxious and couldn't focus. He said I'm "okay" - But the power is on and off cuz of the fire, my mom had super stressful day at work, took codeine, lorazepam and alcohol.. I got mad at her and then was talking with a Ukrainian migrant (Really smart) - And I see.. I should be grateful. But I knew society would be like this - That's why I went out of control. And so many other mental torture I went through. The will to live was stripped from me long ago.. Psychologist would ask me "Any odd thoughts?" **** HIM. I was isolated as all ****. And so, the Ukrainian woman dismissed my philosophy about "Infinity" - Like.. I doesn't matter. She had it worse, why would (Some bipolar guy that is her coworker) would buy drugs or w/e in a manic state "Wtf why are you doing that stuff" - And my interest in neuroscience and pharmacology.. It doesn't matter. They're just "Drugs..", live for a better life - All of that. I gave my mom a hug and said that I'm proud of her for quitting drinking for so long - And then she asks me to plug her phone in - But it happened 4-6 times!! And it's like when she's confused, intoxicated, she does it on purpose for attention. And I SNAPPED. I ****ING SNAPPED BIG TIME, And then acted like nothing happened. She said to my dad "He could be in a psychotic state" - NO IM NOT. Even my dad said "He's okay!" and I was calm, I fell asleep. I took codeine, clonazepam, phenibut and alcohol. It was fine. I sat by the fire at the end of the night with my dad and we listened to a cool podcast - He fell asleep. It was a good visit. But now I just feel like throwing EVERYTHING away. This reality is ****ed. I could kms and end up on an alien planet or somewhere like hell idfk. **** this. **** DP/DR. Nothing is worth this. No one even tries to understand me. Everything I say, it could be said better but IDGAF. I want help but not like this. |
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Angelique67
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Metaphysic
Desoxyn
We are one mind
Member Since: Aug 2016
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 12,962
(SuperPoster!)
4,902 hugs
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#460
The power is still off so I'll meditate once my devices are drained. For now I'll search up how to do it properly.
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SlumberKitty
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