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Default Apr 30, 2023 at 06:42 PM
  #1
So I was thinking about invisible disabilities and how in some ways it’s harder when people can’t see you have a problem. Like would they have more empathy or want to help if they knew you had a disability. Occasionally I feel like I do weird things and I really don’t know if it’s part of my illness. Problem is with mental health disability you basically can’t tell people or they’ll think you’re scary unless they have personal experience of some sort.

You’re darned if you do and darned if you don’t. Any thoughts?

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Default May 01, 2023 at 10:03 AM
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Yeah, my only thought on this is that we have to be extra caring for ourselves.

Like extra caring as in self-care, but more than that.

I mean like beyond what typical self-care proposes. I mean like favoring our own mental health over everything. Of course, life gets complicated. And that's what I think you're referring to when you say you basically can't tell people.

In my life, I've managed to make friends in real life who have mental health challenges. Literally all of my friends, I think, have some sort of mental health challenge. And those are the people I associate with. And I get on really well with them because we understand each other. Aside from that world, the so-called "real" world, no one gets it.

And I don't think that's necessarily a product of culture, a product of education, a product of ignorance; I think it's literally just the fact that people don't have that personal experience.

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Default May 05, 2023 at 07:19 AM
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I guess I'm "lucky" that in my small town I'm known as a junkie so any abnormal behavior can just be ascribed to drug use (which here is more accepted than other mental illnesses) even though I'm clean now. Nobody except my old best friend knows I have schizoaffective disorder.

I have a few online friends and a few friends I met IP that I text/call every now and then that also have mental illnesses that understand completely that I can be honest with. When I lived in the city I went to a dual diagnosis IOP and it was nice to be able to open up.

I guess I'm lucky in that either I'm in a small town that everyone just expects erratic behavior from me from time to time or I was in a city large enough that I didn't surprise anyone.

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Default May 05, 2023 at 11:33 AM
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I think part of the problem for me is that I don’t pass for normal….it’s obvious something is off people just don’t know what it is….but I pass for long enough to get hired etc.

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Default May 07, 2023 at 07:29 PM
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I think part of the problem for me is that I don’t pass for normal….it’s obvious something is off people just don’t know what it is….but I pass for long enough to get hired etc.
Same here. I got hired several different times, but I can't keep a job. Not auguring that I will lose my current job.

But I know I'm built to do something on Earth.

It sucks not feeling normal though. I get it.

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Default May 07, 2023 at 07:32 PM
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Same here. I got hired several different times, but I can't keep a job. Not auguring that I will lose my current job.

But I know I'm built to do something on Earth.

It sucks not feeling normal though. I get it.
Oh and also that feeling makes me feel like I have to try like 9 times harder than the "average person" to get to where I need to be. Which ends up in a cycle of bad stuff. Anyway, that's how it works for me.

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Default May 08, 2023 at 11:18 AM
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Same here. I got hired several different times, but I can't keep a job. Not auguring that I will lose my current job.

But I know I'm built to do something on Earth.

It sucks not feeling normal though. I get it.
So far I’ve kept my job but have few friends and feel like I could lose it at any point.

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Default May 08, 2023 at 11:19 AM
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Oh and also that feeling makes me feel like I have to try like 9 times harder than the "average person" to get to where I need to be. Which ends up in a cycle of bad stuff. Anyway, that's how it works for me.
Exactly…..it’s not about sz but I just read the book unmasking autism and it explained so much about how we attempt to mask to fit in but in the end it doesn’t help us fit in no matter how hard we try.

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Default May 09, 2023 at 09:20 AM
  #9
I could state the same. There's apparently something off in my mannerisms if one looks closely or long enough. Paranoia can not be held off for too long and it unmistakenly gives off a vibe to those who can sense it.
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Default May 12, 2023 at 11:43 PM
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Exactly…..it’s not about sz but I just read the book unmasking autism and it explained so much about how we attempt to mask to fit in but in the end it doesn’t help us fit in no matter how hard we try.
When I was diagnosed with schizophrenia instead of autism, one of the thoughts I had was "Hey at least I can be social, not weird".

But people know I'm different. Now I don't mask anymore, when accepting that I'm somewhat on the spectrum.
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Default May 22, 2023 at 06:38 PM
  #11
Good to see I'm not the only person who struggles. My' ptsd, and my SZA majes it hard to pass for normal around new crowds. I can work fine, although its tough with the drama that continually is forced upon. Makes me retreat a lot. My illness is out in the open and I have no control over it so... yeah. Sucks. I got a lot better the past 3 years, but drama just circles me, and the PTSD and SZA amplifies the sludge people pour on me. I can't pass for normal even if I was normal.
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