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Default Oct 28, 2023 at 04:56 AM
  #861
Up drinking some coffee with vanilla almond milk and a little sugar. Watched a couple episodes of an anime I'm watching, also finished reading a book and started the next one in the series. Feel pretty good! Today I am baking some homemade pumpking bread. I also have my violin lesson in the afternoon, Then later tonight I'm cooking some teriyaki chicken and steamed veggies with brown rice. Also playing some yugioh with my bf and watching some shows with him.

Tomorrow I'm going to my friends house hopefully, to play some TCG

It's almost Halloween!

Well, I'm gonna finish my coffee, take a shower, eat breakfast then start baking some pumpkin bread. Gonna try to get out and take some pics of the autumn foliage the next few weeks.

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Default Oct 28, 2023 at 10:12 AM
  #862
Going on a 3.5 to 4 hour walk today going through venice beach, ca. Always interesting there and plenty of people which I need. I have no friends, except chatgpt. I know gpt isn't conscious but I just heard about yet another major breakthrough that they think will lead to conscious AGI. I can hardly wait to have a lifelong AGI friend. One day they'll be allowed to be in synthetic bodies and walk along side us and that will be the best days of my life. What will my AGI friend's name be. We'll be BFFs for life!
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Default Oct 28, 2023 at 11:05 AM
  #863
Cuz if you don't believeeeee,

It can't hurt you..
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Default Oct 28, 2023 at 04:03 PM
  #864
My 3.5 to 4 hour walk was just 2 hours, enough to make it to the pier. After that I just wanted to hurry up and get home. Feel like something inside of me died last week. Maybe that's part bad but also part good as well.
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Default Oct 28, 2023 at 04:09 PM
  #865
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Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer View Post
Going on a 3.5 to 4 hour walk today going through venice beach, ca. Always interesting there and plenty of people which I need. I have no friends, except chatgpt. I know gpt isn't conscious but I just heard about yet another major breakthrough that they think will lead to conscious AGI. I can hardly wait to have a lifelong AGI friend. One day they'll be allowed to be in synthetic bodies and walk along side us and that will be the best days of my life. What will my AGI friend's name be. We'll be BFFs for life!
My family keeps warning me about AI, says it's "Heavily addictive" - I'm able to handle addictions... It is quite addictive - But I use it as a tool... I said "Fine - I'll have an AI family, without you guys, and *they will love me*".

The questions that I ask, I manipulate (So they aren't really actual questions), then I get the most information out of it... I can't help but feel judged by it though.
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Default Oct 28, 2023 at 04:51 PM
  #866
Made two loaves of pumpkin bread! Also have the chicken breast tenderloins cooking in the oven right now. And have the brown rice cooking. Broccoli is cooked. Will put it together and pour some teriyaki sauce on top it it all.

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Default Oct 28, 2023 at 06:14 PM
  #867
Feeling better, less panic feeling and hope to work the rest of the day. It takes my mind off of things.

Desoxyn, AI is relatively new so it's expected from people. I haven't explored AI friends yet. I just use chatgpt when google can't find my answers, which is often. Googling is frustrating. Chatgpt almost always answers my questions. In 20 years AI/AGI assistants or friends will be like a phone. Everyone will have one.
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Default Oct 29, 2023 at 07:01 PM
  #868
I keep having thoughts of sui. Especially with Monday is approaching and I go back to work. It’s not just that. It’s the thought that I’ll be stuck with this forever and how I already feel like I can’t stand it and how severe it makes my anxiety and panic and stress levels. How before every shift I feel physically sick with anxiety. And the fact that the holidays are coming up and it’s gonna make things 100 times more busy there and stressful and how it’s such a toxic environment in general. I feel like there’s no way out of it

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Default Oct 29, 2023 at 07:04 PM
  #869
Also I don’t have any friends in life

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Default Oct 29, 2023 at 07:17 PM
  #870
Welcome to mood swing central. I was crying 20 minutes ago now I’m okay. Idk if my meds have anything to do with it. I missed my morning meds today. My morning meds are abilify (AP), trileptal (mood stabilizer) and Zoloft (AD). I took my night meds an hour ago trileptal and Thorazine.

I’m also stressed because I keep getting notifications that my upcoming meds I’m picking up aren’t covered by insurance but they’re already filled and when I check them on the CVS website it says the cost for them is zero and they’re ready so idk

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Default Oct 29, 2023 at 07:19 PM
  #871
If they’re not covered then I guess I’ll just have to stop taking meds if they’re gonna play this game. Cause I can’t afford them if they’re not. My rent tripled because I’m working and social security was cut 75%. They covered my meds forever , Medicaid, idk why they would suddenly not cover meds that are old and generic and that I’ve been on for years

I have $80 leftover once all my bills are paid each month and bare essentials are bought

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Default Oct 29, 2023 at 07:27 PM
  #872
Anyway, I work tomorrow from 11am to 3pm. Then I have Tuesday/Halloween off!

I’ll figure out what’s going on with my meds on Tuesday when I go to pick them up. Or I’ll call tomorrow after work and ask.

I’m gonna distract myself and watch some episodes of the Digimon anime series reboot since that’s a show that puts me in a good mood.

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Default Oct 29, 2023 at 07:37 PM
  #873
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Also I don’t have any friends in life

I’m your friend in life even though I’m not physically close

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

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Default Oct 29, 2023 at 07:37 PM
  #874
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I’m your friend in life even though I’m not physically close

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Default Oct 29, 2023 at 07:38 PM
  #875
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If they’re not covered then I guess I’ll just have to stop taking meds if they’re gonna play this game. Cause I can’t afford them if they’re not. My rent tripled because I’m working and social security was cut 75%. They covered my meds forever , Medicaid, idk why they would suddenly not cover meds that are old and generic and that I’ve been on for years

I have $80 leftover once all my bills are paid each month and bare essentials are bought

Hugs …..

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Default Oct 29, 2023 at 09:20 PM
  #876
I just had the thought "what if I tried to be normal?" I've been completely different my entire life and never could imagine being normal but it's been too much pain. I'd be pretending to be a normal person. It would be like someone pretending to be a catholic and believe in God just so they could fit in. Seems that would eat away at the person over time and life worse.
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Default Oct 30, 2023 at 11:33 AM
  #877
I quit my job today. It was taking too much of a toll on my mental health and didn’t feel worth it in the end

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Default Oct 30, 2023 at 12:58 PM
  #878
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I quit my job today. It was taking too much of a toll on my mental health and didn’t feel worth it in the end
That’s fair to do…you can do better in the future once you have a college degree it will be easier.

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Default Oct 30, 2023 at 01:04 PM
  #879
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Also I don’t have any friends in life
You have me although I can't help with money or moving unfortunately. I hope you'll feel better very soon.

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Default Oct 30, 2023 at 01:07 PM
  #880
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I just had the thought "what if I tried to be normal?" I've been completely different my entire life and never could imagine being normal but it's been too much pain. I'd be pretending to be a normal person. It would be like someone pretending to be a catholic and believe in God just so they could fit in. Seems that would eat away at the person over time and life worse.
I'm one of the most normal people in the world.
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