Roll Call 202

And the rest

A lot of them are silly little light cozy fantasy romance books cause I’m trying to get out of a reading slump. But yeah I’m excited about these books

I'm taking a break from violin lessons for 2 months since they're expensive but I'm still gonna practice everything we've been working on everyday in the meantime then I'll resume lessons in August

I have to go get bloodwork for my psychiatrist on Monday. I see him Wednesday. I'm doing well aside from the slip up with the edible use, that was my own fault though and I definitely learned my lesson from it. I'm hoping we can start decreasing the thorazine now that the abilify is up to 20mg. The goal is to just be on abilify and trileptal. So we're workin on coming off the thorazine and zoloft now.

It's been 5 days off THC now. I'm tracking it with the I am Sober App. I feel better when I'm sober. Like a lot better. There's not that euphoric high which can be fun but at the same time I feel stable and a lot more in control and calmer and more productive, less paranoid, less delusional, less anxious, less panicky. So I think living a sober life is the best for me. Also I was getting kind of obsessed with getting high. Like I'd schedule it in my day daily in my time blocking scheduling app like a weirdo because it was the main thing I'd look forward to and I'd plan out all my future weed related purchases months in advance. That's not good. Especially since addiction runs in my family and I have an addictive personality.

I spent the past two months high and planning my days around getting high

I’m finally through that nightmare and feel 100% better. I walked on the treadmill on an incline for 30 minutes. Sat outside for 30 minutes and read. Did the dishes. Got my protein powder and almond milk. I feel alive for the first time in 6 days. I slept good last night. Woke up, ate, took my meds, fell back asleep and took a nap for a couple hours. Now I’m just trying to decide what to do the rest of the day. I might draw some. And practice violin and ukulele

I forgot to say thank you for the birthday wishes from you all so I’m sorry. Thank you, I was just so out of it the past 6 days.

The main withdrawal symptoms I’ve had from quitting THC 6 days ago were anxiety and nausea. The nausea was really bad the first couple of days. The anxiety and panic was astronomical the first 4 days. I still have some anxiety but it’s getting better overall. I hope I didn’t like permanently wreck my brain or something though

my progress so far with quitting thc and caffeine. i do dri k decaf now which I know has very small amounts of caffeine however compared to 6-8 cups of fully caffeineted coffee a day thats a lot better.

Increasing the dose of Abilify can lead to impulsivity so be careful

It partially agonizes D2 receptors (Like LSD) - Can give you bad ADHD, like what happened to me, pure manic impulsivity, recklessness, self-destructive etc.

I'm doubling the dose of Vraylar tomorrow - It partially agonizes D3 receptors, and D2 (A little bit). Very good for depression.

I’ve been on this dose of abilify before (when I was on the injection) and it wasn’t an issue then so I don’t think it will be an issue. It’s been 3 weeks since he increased it to 20mg from 15mg and I don’t feel manic or impulsive. It was actually increased to help calm down a manic episode

I’ve been on vraylar before in the past I was on 3mg of that. I couldn’t sleep on it though and it was making me kind of manic so I had to get off it. I hope it helps you though

Manic? Yes..

Give me mania o.-

(Jkjk) - Hypomania would be nice though, to make up for all of my horrifying despair and depression lol

But it has just been like a mood stabilizer, which is what I really need.

Day 2x on double dose Vraylar, no side effects - Work goes by fast - I'm not even bothered to work even longer, it doesn't bother me. I'm not depressed at all.

Eventually I'll try to get off the Invega, slowly.

Very depressed

I got bloodwork done today for my psychiatrist. Just routine stuff and checking my trileptal levels. I see him the day after tomorrow.

I'm not manic anymore that's for sure. So the abilify increase helped a lot, and the thorazine increase as well, and stopping the zoloft. I'm at 20mg Abilify now. I'm hoping he can start tapering me off the thorazine now that I'm okay on the abilify. I've kind of gone the other direction now and am a bit depressed. I just want to be on a simplified med combo. Not like 5-6 meds like I used to be on. My goal is to just be on the trileptal and abilify since those two help me the most. Right now I'm just on three meds and one PRN which I hardly take the PRN. So my main meds are abilify, thorazine and trileptal.

So yeah that's the goal. Just get off the thorazine. Then I'll just be on Trileptal 1500mg , Abilify 20mg, and propranolol PRN 10mg

I broke up with my boyfriend today

I hope it's ok to post here. My son has a pretty severe case of schizophrenia. 4 years ago he did something and can't come back home bc I know he will stop taking his meds and start smoking weed again.

I have numerous mental health problems as well. I can't be his caregiver. He lived in a group home until he started acting up really bad in it. He was in the hospital while my sister took over trying to find a place more fitting for him to go. He's on the spectrum as well. He's 29 but I would say he's more like 16. So he's in a developitally delayed home with just 20 other men in it. He's much happier. He came for a visit the other day and is stopping by today to get some things he ordered off Amazon. Then not this weekend, but the next he will come for a 2 day visit. I'm so glad to see him happy again. But they put him on seroquel in the hospital and he's gained a lot of weight. But he's going to start working out again he says. I just hope I can gain support here and also give it.

Oh no what happened?

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I’ve just been depressed so I ended things today, I couldn’t keep up with being in a relationship while being depressed

Also I lost my social security due to having those jobs previously so now I can’t pay rent and may or may not be homeless in a month or so if I can’t figure something out

I applied to some jobs today. So I’m hoping I hear something back soon. I am aiming to work and stay off social security cause it’s too much of a pain to deal with and I’d be able to make more money. I’d lose my rental stipend so I’d have to pay the full amount of rent for my apartment instead of 30% of my income but it would work out better overall.

And me and my bf are back together. I was just being impulsive because I was stressed about stuff.

It's disheartening to read this, but I'm also very happy he has support! Many don't, I know it is very hard to care for him - He seems to be doing ok, that's important cuz it can get messy - The older he gets (With proper care, and staying away from weed etc), the more mature and stable he will get. Sometimes (At least for me), I needed to go through the instability (Because of trauma), and sort of.. Let it all out.. I guess.. But my mom was always there for me - She never kicked me out, she loved me unconditionally (Even though she was neglectful in the beginning). Family needs to stick together (Especially with how divided everyone in society is becoming etc), and be close.. We're only human, and have a ****** deal - It's a cold world out there, especially now. Love is all he needs, remember that... And not everyone can be a caregiver, don't beat yourself up about that.. You are trying your best..

With the right meds (Especially good new meds that are available now), the best treatment possible, at least what you can do is help to advocate for him ^-; Drugs are can be a problem, people self medicate, because there's horrors that are within the mind.. It can happen. With autism spectrum disorder, there's a delay in frontal lobe development (And weed makes that worse), but it'll get better. There's *faith/hope*, it's hard...

Anyway, for me I like to help people - But I was one of the more problematic cases lol.. I've improved myself over the years, have very good treatment, I'm taken care of.. I'm grateful - And all of us will keep growing from this.. Any med questions though, you can ask me (I know too much about psychoactive chemicals lol, and I love to do research and learn about what I don't know) - And any support of updates you want to post, you can post here - We don't bite, and are friendly, supportive... Much love to you and that kid