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  #1  
Old Apr 05, 2013, 10:03 PM
basharneedshelp basharneedshelp is offline
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so about 1 month ago, i moved to a new school for certain reasons. This school was approximately 2-3 times the size of my old school and this had made a huge impact on me. in my old school, everyone knew each other and it was a simple and small school. Ever since i moved to the new school, i started thinking weather or not i was acting unnaturally, because i wasn't used to being around so many people. I always think "am i saying my thoughts out loud?" i would think that because a lot of people would start looking at me for no reason what so ever. this bugs me so much that it's affecting my social life. I'm now much less confident and much more stressful because of this. I always try to calm down and tell myself "its ok, im being treated the same way as others so its not possible that im not normal." but these thoughts are just getting worse and worse. as a matter of fact, this girl likes me and im letting her down because my thoughts are keeping me from expressing my feelings. i need some immediate help Thank You.
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  #2  
Old Apr 06, 2013, 12:17 AM
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Travelinglady Travelinglady is offline
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Location: North Carolina
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Hello--and welcome! I can understand how you would feel uncomfortable about having to move and moving to such a big place where you don't know anybody. I encourage you to talk to the school counselor. He/she might be able to give you some advice and pointers.

And we are here as well. We can support you as you make an effort to get to know new people at your school--and you can make some friends here, too!
  #3  
Old Apr 06, 2013, 11:06 AM
basharneedshelp basharneedshelp is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PAYNE1 View Post
Hello--and welcome! I can understand how you would feel uncomfortable about having to move and moving to such a big place where you don't know anybody. I encourage you to talk to the school counselor. He/she might be able to give you some advice and pointers.

And we are here as well. We can support you as you make an effort to get to know new people at your school--and you can make some friends here, too!
Well, do you have any advice on what I should do? this is really stressful and frustrating.
  #4  
Old Apr 06, 2013, 12:49 PM
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optimize990h optimize990h is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by basharneedshelp View Post
i would think that because a lot of people would start looking at me for no reason what so ever. this bugs me so much that it's affecting my social life. I'm now much less confident and much more stressful because of this. I always try to calm down and tell myself "its ok, im being treated the same way as others so its not possible that im not normal." but these thoughts are just getting worse and worse. as a matter of fact, this girl likes me and im letting her down because my thoughts are keeping me from expressing my feelings. i need some immediate help Thank You.
Hello, basharneedshelp.

Unusual Thinking :(



What you are experiencing is similar to cultural shock. This why seeing a counsellor at school is important to start the process of having a focused goal with clear plan of treatment of your situation.

The feedback here at PC will help you understand you are not alone in your feelings. And the best way of explaining your stress to a potential friend at school is explain you have not experienced so many people in a school.

(There is more social and other information to process at the new school than you have been exposed to.)
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  #5  
Old Apr 06, 2013, 08:56 PM
basharneedshelp basharneedshelp is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2013
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Originally Posted by optimize990h View Post
Hello, basharneedshelp.



What you are experiencing is similar to cultural shock. This why seeing a counsellor at school is important to start the process of having a focused goal with clear plan of treatment of your situation.

The feedback here at PC will help you understand you are not alone in your feelings. And the best way of explaining your stress to a potential friend at school is explain you have not experienced so many people in a school.

(There is more social and other information to process at the new school than you have been exposed to.)
Thank you for your help. But another problem is that my accent gets worse when im in a stressful mood. I came to the United States about 5 years ago and i got used to speaking English quickly but i have small accent. My accent almost never occurs but when i'm around unfamiliar people, my accent gets a lot worse. This happens because i care too much about what i'm gonna say and i get afraid on weather or not they're going to understand what im going to say. Do you have any advice on how I can overcome this issue? Again, my accent only occurs when i think about it too much and when I'm afraid to say what im going to say. Help would be appreciated, thank you.
  #6  
Old Apr 07, 2013, 04:21 PM
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Travelinglady Travelinglady is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
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Hmm. The accent issue might be because you are getting a bit nervous, too. Do people make fun of your accent? Knowing you are not a native of the U.S. should lead them to be more understanding. I bet you speak English better (at least in other ways) than some natives. If they give you a hard time about it, then I encourage you not to worry. Just speak the best you can.

Do you watch "The Big Bang Theory" on TV? The character Raj is from India, and he has a bit of an accent. But no one gives him a hard time about it. Maybe you are being too hard on yourself.
  #7  
Old Apr 08, 2013, 01:29 AM
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wolfie205 wolfie205 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2013
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Posts: 103
Hello! I had to transfer schools in High school and I was really shy and awkward socially so I really know how tough this must be for you! Especially when you're in for a foreign country too... Don't worry about the accent, most people won't give you a hard time about it, and if they do, just ignore them. Is there a particular group of friends that you hang out with? Maybe getting more comfortable with them can help you to fit in better. And try to calm down... Usually we start becoming hypersensitive to what's going on around us when we're really anxious or uncomfortable, so don't get too stressed up about it!
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