Anxiety over school, racing/intrusive thoughts

Hello everybody,<br />
Like many of you out there I'm suffering from lots of anxiety preventing me from living a happy life. I started to realize I had this issue when I started high school and it has been very difficult for me to focus on class work without getting distracted, becoming disorganized because of impulsiveness, and my pacing.<br />
A little history: 5 years ago, I moved from a small quiet town in a state with a low reputation to a much more well regarded one. I was very nervous at the time and couldn't tell what emotions I had. The school I started attending was pretty decent in an affluent suburban school district. Before high school, I felt that I had the same problems, but I somehow managed to cope with it. I also have depression. Because I'm not able to get the grades I want, I get more depressed making me care less and not try. Even when my classes are easy in a semester, I still have the same problem with procrastination and inattention and depression. I know I'm smart because I was doing well before and I know a lot of things, but my management in school became really bad. I think I'm pretty good at math, but I've struggled this year because I would get stressed out and I would get distracted a lot during class. My parents think it's because I don't do my homework, but I would do all of my homework if I wasn't so stressed out with intrusive and racing thoughts in my head. When I find something intriguing or interesting, I'll somehow find a way to distract myself from the things i need to get done preventing me from doing it.<br />
Now, I'm not sure, but I think a lot of my anxiety has come from being isolated through video games and the internet. I use the internet SO much, I'm really dependent on it, but I'm trying to get better. I've started to realize that a lot of my anxiety has come from my sister always telling me what to do in my child making me become not independent and nervous all the time. Currently I'm taking Wellbutrin at 300mg. The meds I have taken so far have not really helped, although I've been able to concentrate better with wellbutrin. It's hard for me to know when it helps, because sometimes I think it does and sometimes I think it doesn't.<br />
I just started school (junior year), and i don't want to get in this bad loophole again. Right now I'm struggling to change my classes to the ones I want but my counselor won't let me switch them.<br />
So pretty much my main priority right now is to do really well in school (getting all As), as it has not been manageable for me before. I feel better with Wellbutrin, but junior year is supposed to get really difficult.<br />
So tell me...<br />
(I'm very desperate)<br />
What do i do?<br />
I would like to add more details, but there is so much to write (thinking about this made me post this later than i should've).<br/>

Hi, streets, and welcome! Would your parents allow you to go to see a regular doctor and tell him/her about your situation?

Is your counselor one associated with the school (as in a guidance counselor) or one in private practice?

Wellbutrin is an anti-depressant. I am thinking you might need something else as well.

Be careful what you take. Some of those meds can really rev you up and make you manic or agitated. My racing thoughts started in High School and they were horrible in college. You'll have to experiment with different meds to see what you tolerate and react to. That can take a long time for some people. You talk about racing thoughts and Robin Williams: that's what my mind was like for the good first-half of my life and I had no idea what was happening to me. Your health is the most important thing.

I have a "life coach", which is basically a therapist that talks me through techniques how to deal certain types of stress, including strategies for staying focused while studying/reading where I have most trouble with (it has worked sometimes for me but I still have the same issues because of the stress of this deadline I've been putting off for some time). I'm considering to have another appointment with my psychiatrist because I'm still having issues with certain anxieties. I think those things have stressed me out more because it was something that I've had going on/on my mind before I started taking meds. By the way, I see my life coach and psychiatrist infrequently because I need more time to try techniques.

Regardless, I do have to say that wellbutrin has actually been helping me a lot during the school day. I am much less disoriented and worried than I was last year. I can concentrate a lot better. In the evening is when I start having problems, I often don't complete all of my work. That has to with that my schedule had yet to change to my proper subjects, another anxiety which has stressed me out. Also, this year I'm doing running, and while I feel more energetic (which was the for me doing it), I feel sore at home making me anxious. I enjoy being on the team, but I don't know I should deal with the tiredness.
(Back to Wellbutrin) I think this is the best meds I've tried so far because I've actually noticed more progress. There I times where I feel more alone and depressed, but I've been able to tolerate it for the most part. I don't think I should switch meds, but rather I think I need to adjust the dose/change when I take it. I was bumped to 300mg for a short time because I wasn't noticing any benefit within the three months I've taken it for that time, but eventually my dad bumped me down to 150 mg to reduce side effects. There are a few days where I decide to take 300mg if I feel that I need to complete more tasks (like today). Do you think consistently going back to 300 will help? Will taking it more than once a day help me?

Just my 2 cents, but I don't think taking it more than once a day will help. Check the bottle, you may be on 300mg XL, meaning extended release. Usually it's just taken in the morning since it tends to activate us just a bit.

Have you thought about taking a year off to work? It's just an idea, I'm not saying you should. But maybe you'll get some routine there that might help.

Peace

For some reason trying 300mg xl didn't help me, and I felt better on 150 so I'll be on that dose tomorrow. Thanks for the answer about how often during the day I should take it. Since my psychiatrist primarily prescribes medicine, would it not be worth it to see him again? He gave me psychotherapy before, but my life coach gives me it as well. Im asking because my dad gets annoyed when I ask him because he finds it wastes his money when it doesnt help (I had to beg to get any type of help in the first place).

Regarding taking a gap year, Im in only in my junior year of high school which is pretty important for college. Also, I have parents that are from South Asia that have high expectations for me, so not doing any work at all kind of makes it worse.

I think my problem now is just the deadline work/scheduling anxiety dilemma that I have to overcome. Then I'll be able to truly see what wellbutrin does for me in the real world.

^Not that I mean I'm not struggling, I still need advice and help on how do deal with my problems.

Yeah, it sounds like a gap year wouldn't be helpful at this point. I'm sorry to hear your Dad isn't big on psychotherapy.... Some people just aren't on board with it. That's alright, you can endure in spite of his prejudice. Make the therapy/life coach help really count by staying focused on every piece of advice they give you. Focus on the help you get from them. Deep breathe. You can do this!