[marcella606]

Hi everyone,
I am having a hard time trying to figure out what I can be good at. I am very depressed because I quit my job 2 yrs ago because of personal reasons and because I moved. the job I had was the only thing that made me feel like I accomplished something. I thought that going back to school would make me feel better about myself. I am almost done with an Associate degree, which honestly I think will do nothing for me. the job I left made me as much money as someone with a masters degree. anyway I turned 40 yrs old this year and I am so confused to what to do with myself. I am embarrassed of how my life turned out because I had so much opportunities.

Hello Marcella: Yes, I can't tell you how many times I've read, here on PC, where some of us folks who are a bit older feel so sad about the way our lives have turned out. I certainly feel this way. I'm in my mid-sixties now. But I stopped working around 15+ years ago. At this point, I guess I'm more-or-less reconciled to the way things have turned out. But for many years I was very sad & not just a little bit embarrassed...

You may very well be correct that you'll never recover the wage level you had at your last job. But, hopefully, you enjoy the type of work you went back to school for. And, perhaps also, having that additional education will mean you will be better able to seek promotions once you get back to work. Who knows what great things might happen?

Anyway, from my perspective, at least, being 40 is not that old. You have years ahead of you. (Hopefully that sounds challenging, not depressing...) I wish you much success as you move back out into the work force...

[Frankbtl]

Hi marcella, first of all CONGRATS on nearing completion of the Associate degree!!!!!
Doesn't matter if it does nothing for you when it comes down to it, that really is a big achievement!!!! Well done!!!!!
Now when you're trying to think of things you can be good at............linking in with feeling accomplished and the opportunities you had..........I'm wondering if you're looking at that a little narrowly???
Because IMO to feel you're good at something, a purpose, a sense of achievement, a meaningfulness in/about your life (you mentioned embarrassment in how your life had turned out) you don't necessarily have to have those "golden" opportunities or even run with them.
Now you might/probably already have had a lot of that in your life without noticing it as much, if you expand your perspectives..............but if you're looking at moving on with that well you can move the "goal posts" to wherever you want, wherever is meaningful and fulfilling to you. No embarrassment in not having a certain job, status, wage level as far as I'm concerned, none at all!!
It's about what makes you fulfilled that counts..........so what do you think for now, to give you that kick start??? Could you get into something artistic, something around helping people, some sort of voluntary work (even if just a little), some sort of sport (even just bowling), "expanding your mind" through reading (poetry even??)........??? Whatever gives you a sense of meaning, purpose, satisfaction or accomplishment.
Unless you think the depression might be holding you back a bit much??? Of course still try different things...........but it might be you need a little extra support with that too. Maybe seeing a doctor, a T or just over time talking/riding it through e.g. with us (!!) ???
And hopefully the job situation can gradually be sorted out too, afterall 40 really isn't old!!! Then again by then it might not matter as much to you if it doesn't give you that big a sense of accomplishment if you have other things in your life which do that for you.

Alison

[vital]

Originally Posted by marcella606

Hi everyone,
I am having a hard time trying to figure out what I can be good at. I am very depressed because I quit my job 2 yrs ago because of personal reasons and because I moved. the job I had was the only thing that made me feel like I accomplished something. I thought that going back to school would make me feel better about myself. I am almost done with an Associate degree, which honestly I think will do nothing for me. the job I left made me as much money as someone with a masters degree. anyway I turned 40 yrs old this year and I am so confused to what to do with myself. I am embarrassed of how my life turned out because I had so much opportunities.

Hi marcella. I have a feeling that you might like the book

"The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle.

- v

[KristenRenee]

Hi. I know this is an older thread but reading your post was like reading my life. I quit working 5 years ago due to my Bipolar and drug abuse problems. I am now on permanent social security. I feel totally worthless inside. At least when I worked I felt I had a purpose. Now I feel like I don't belong to anything or anywhere. I've been told I should volunteer. I guess that would help me, I just don't have the motivation to do it. I feel stuck.