[ReptileInYourHead]

I don't know if this has been proposed here yet, but mr.stranger inspired me to think of a way to put the past behind us, where it belongs.

A mock funeral...
for your past.

Eulogy and all.

In the least it would be a fun exercise.

I read yours in another thread. It was creative. I liked the idea. I've never thought of it from that perspective. It's interesting. I will try to write something when my mind clears, because I'm really trapped in my past. I want to lay it in peace for me to live.

[Nevernomore]

This might be worth a try. Thanks for the idea.

[ReptileInYourHead]

My pleasure

[TishaBuv]

I rehashed all my stuff from the past, feel like i reconnected to myself, defended the child (although no one acted any better for it), and feel ready to move forward with the present.

I think this is human nature for healing.

[ReptileInYourHead]

Excellent.

I kind of copped out on my eulogy for the sake of conciseness. It's important to go into greater detail about the most prominent regrets and unattach those guilty, shameful feelings from those memories.
We are victims of our own faulty thinking, which, as far as children are concerned, is beyond their control.

Though the eulogy is usually a speech spoken at the end of a life, mine ushered in the beginning of one.
I have a long way to go yet.

[David_Gatiss]

One cool way to bury and move on from your past is to make a new start, say changing city/home, shifting social circles, trying new things, or taking up a new pursuit you have wanted to all along. I suggest checking out my introductory thread in member introductions. I have shared the one piece of advice that turned my life around for good.

[winter4me]

I have used changing jobs, going places, etc. to make new starts....and it does work, for a while....I find that times in my life when I am less busy (& could therefore pursue some of my own interests that don't really cost much if anything) the past comes creeping back, usually beginning with dreams, early morning anxiety, and getting stuck in place.
The older I get, the more annoying this is....I often know what would help but just can't quite "get there" for quite a while...(in one of those places now...)

[David_Gatiss]

Originally Posted by winter4me

I have used changing jobs, going places, etc. to make new starts....and it does work, for a while....I find that times in my life when I am less busy (& could therefore pursue some of my own interests that don't really cost much if anything) the past comes creeping back, usually beginning with dreams, early morning anxiety, and getting stuck in place.
The older I get, the more annoying this is....I often know what would help but just can't quite "get there" for quite a while...(in one of those places now...)

That's a pretty spot on observation. See, this is a catch-22 situation. The old patterns, which are imprinted on your brain have been there probably since early childhood. If you want them to go away, you have to give it at least 135 days so new pathways start building in your brain.

It's completely normal to want to relax for a while than just keep oneself mindlessly busy. But the problem here is, if your mind is not occupied somewhere else, those gremlins are going to start harrassing you.

This is why, I would recommend to pick those priorities right from the start that you love to engage in, even if somehow they don't yield any practical results. For me they are Yoga, gym, gardening, socializing, helping businesses, inspiring others, to name just a few. There are off days, but since I find these priorities so personally rewarding, it is not that difficult to show up every day. As you get used to it, you are going to WANT to keep doing it.

I can't imagine regressing to my past self. It was all a nightmare. That fear keeps me going.

Originally Posted by ReptileInYourHead

I don't know if this has been proposed here yet, but mr.stranger inspired me to think of a way to put the past behind us, where it belongs.

A mock funeral...
for your past.

Eulogy and all.

In the least it would be a fun exercise.

In a way, I do something philosophically similar. Every so often, I throw out my journals or write a goodbye to my past. That way, I feel like I've discarded and/or made peace with the memory of difficult times. This helps me believe that I can have something like a blank slate, a fresh start. So I ruminate less on the past, even if temporarily. That's motivating for me.