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Old 04-12-2022, 12:09 AM   #521
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Default emoji

I see a little box of emoji to the right of this entry space >>> so click on more and have at it.

Cheers for getting your taxes done. I just printed them out for my partner, so now have to scout out an envelope, labels, etc. We never file online.

I'm getting rolling with a new client and the fantasy is that after today's amazing struggle to arrange a 15 minute site visit I'll grasp how they grasp basic steps and I'll get better and getting my simple request across the first time.

Thrilled you like my sunjoke. r
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Old 04-14-2022, 10:59 AM   #522
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Smirk Re: A few Measly Steps a Day

The emojis show up on the "Reply" but not on the "Quick Reply." I knew they were there somewhere - I've used them before. So thanks.

I'm done with most of the big projects and chores (taxes, classes, etc.) and am now free to work on my novel. I cut my Nanowrimo goal from 50,000 words to 20,000 words, and that feels like a goal I can achieve. As usual, I'm hitting slow spots which need improvement, but I'm not sure how to improve them.

Happy stepping.
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Old 04-17-2022, 10:28 AM   #523
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Default Re: A few Measly Steps a Day

Aha, we found out the emoji quirk.

Today I'm dealing with duty-chores and back fill. Have property taxes to pay which a friend reminded me of yesterday. Added to my calendar alert system.

To delay getting to the chores I think I'll look up blogs for why we hate chores so much ... yup, they're out there. Some other people thoughts I more or less accept:
  1. Boring
  2. Repetitive
  3. Never ahead, always behind
  4. Feeling trapped by own personality
  5. Not my "real work"
  6. "That's not my job" (thanks Freddie Prinze, Sr ~ R.I.P.); that is too often picking up other people's work (Revu's most hated)
  7. There's no awards ceremony, grants, prizes, news coverage

Tick, tock, gotta rocket, R.
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Old 04-17-2022, 11:09 AM   #524
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Default Re: A few Measly Steps a Day

Dirty, stinky work.
My shoulder and arms hurt making the bed and carrying things.
Would rather be -------------
I'll just get it dirty, or messy, or stinky again.

Happy Easter, R.
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Old 04-21-2022, 09:17 PM   #525
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Default Re: A few Measly Steps a Day

Wierd Facebook message. A friend messaged me. She's a priest, and she said she just got a grant for $150,000 to be given away to retired, disabled, poverty stricken, etc. and she suggested that I could apply for some of it. The organization that the money came from appears legit, and I know the person. I said I really didn't need it.
she suggested trying out the link anyway. That's about when I decided this is a scam, and I'm sure my friend didn't send the message. I haven't seen her in about twenty years. I'm trying to find a way to get in touch with her - I don't have her number anymore. I don't think she's the one who sent the message. Anyway . . .
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Old 04-23-2022, 02:25 PM   #526
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Default Sat 4/23/2022

Re: FB scam. Not sure what to do either. I did a lot of research after I suspected an Indiegogo 'campaign' had no intentions of delivering the goods I appealed to a lot of places. Indiegogo and Kickstarter have supposed 'anti-fraud' units doing all they can to ferret out fraud, & uphold Truth, Justice & The American Way. Ha, that's so funny.

If there's a FB fraud & deception department, of course there isI'd send them a note with the particulars, and then "unfriend" that account. As you said, you haven't been in touch for 20 years.

I'm home with a runny nose and just feeling run down. Took the home COVID-test, came back Negative.

Missing a memorial at a fancy restaurant because I'm staying put!

Using the time to waste whole days! What fun. r
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Old 04-28-2022, 03:04 PM   #527
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Default I'm feeling better

Continuing a clearing out of broken behaviors. One is I get stuck defending ideas, imagination, and action when someone starts moping about the decline of something or the sad state of things. It's a full on waste of my time and attention and energy and creativity.

Had a deep dive into this with my mens group last night and feeling ready to walkaway. These are great chances to
  • step back and breathe
  • let others keep talking and keep silent
  • change the subject
  • ask: What do you want me to make of that bit of analysis/news? Followed with: let me think about it.
  • Remember my heroes and peeroes who share my take on things.
There lives an industry for dealing with negative people. How sad. r
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Old 05-01-2022, 04:22 PM   #528
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Default Re: A few Measly Steps a Day

Thank goodness for positive people.
I have three difficult steps:
Call the court and get out of jury duty. (I signed in online and told them I couldn't serve. They said fine. Then I got a nastygram informing me that I hadn't shown up for JD.
Make an appt for a new primary care doctor.
Do a hatchet job to the weeds in my yard. (That's actually about five steps to do all the weeding, and probably includes calling a gardener.)
Meanwhile, I keep writing. I think it's going well, but I always have self doubts. With good reason or not? Don't know.
We had a plant sale at our church. Last year I took my friend's plants because she couldn't take care of them in assisted living. Very long story short, they were a huge success. And I have one succulent arrangement to give back to her. She was happy, and I felt good to be a part of her success.
That's it for me.
Good wishes.
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Old 05-02-2022, 01:37 AM   #529
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Default Very Late Sun 5/1/22

What's your angle for avoiding Jury Duty? I think they might rebrand it as Jury Party, and have classes to take part in while waiting around. Most times i go if I can but only for civil cases. I can't see being part of the prison industrial complex.

Very sad day. Someone I very rarely play bridge with but think is a terrific person told me her husband died about 3 months ago. And I got a text from a high school classmate telling me my last closest friend from my class died this morning.

More or less "cancelled" plans for tonight, lit a candle, and stared out into the darkness. r
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Old 05-07-2022, 12:30 PM   #530
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Default Re: A few Measly Steps a Day

I'm over seventy, and I can just say I can't do it because of a medical condition. I actually liked being on a jury. It's easy work, and I think people who are reasonably intelligent should be the ones on juries. At night, I sleep for one to two hours at a stretch. Often I spend two to four hours reading in the middle of the night because I can't get back to sleep. For this reason, I avoid anything that involved being somewhere early in the morning. If I have a bad night, I shouldn't be driving, and getting to the court on public transportation is tricky. I'd probably take Uber if I had to show up. $$$ The last time I had to show up, I slept through voire dire.
I called the court, and the clerk told me to write a letter or an email saying that I was over 70 and couldn't serve because of a medical condition. I tried the email, and their website wouldn't allow me to be excused. I wrote a letter and sent it snail mail. A second clerk told me the same thing. I'll wait and see what happens. The clerks said I'd get confirmation. Since the website wouldn't let me get excused, I wonder. And I don't expect a snail mail response anytime soon. Will you visit me in jail? I'll probably have to show up some time and tell them in person that I can't serve.

I'm sorry about the death of your friends. It's hard losing people you care about. I'll say a prayer for them and for you.

Good wishes.
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Old 05-08-2022, 11:26 PM   #531
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Default poof - and a week flies by

Yeah, you got your reasons and I think the "court" will give you pass, but oddly, you might have to appear in person.

My friend's service is this Friday @ 9:00 am PDT. I'll sit quiet in her memory and bid her farewell and a good voyage in the next realms. She did a lot of good and we had a terrific rapport.

A living friend is working on producing some type of event on grief. I'm too committed to other things to do more than attend a few of their planning meetings. I had to drop back as soon I thought I might diplomatically.

Just completed (I hope) some paperwork on an Exxon explosion & fire from 1993! Its for my dead father, we might get something out of the class action, but he'll get none of it.

Capitalist justice at its finest. r
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Old 05-09-2022, 06:22 PM   #532
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Your friend sounds like a wonderful person. I'm sorry for your loss.
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Old 05-09-2022, 06:39 PM   #533
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Default Re: A few Measly Steps a Day

I never thought of myself as a scanner, but now I sit surrounded by half-finished projects, and I have no idea how I'll finish them. And some of these projects involve other people, so they can't just be pushed away for a couple of years; they have to be completed.

Three art projects. One just needs to be mounted. the other two need gluing, sewing and and hanging. Face it, the one with the sewing should be put away for two or three years. People are coming to my house. I want to spackle, texturize and paint two half walls. This project has been sitting unfinished for months. My novel and my novel is ongoing, and my garden is ongoing, but I'd like to clean up the brush piles and the really ugly parts. Then there's the jury duty. I want to keep an eye out for some indication that my letter got there and that I really am excused. Yes, I might have to show up in person. I can handle it if it's only one day. I need to find the name of my new doctor and make an appointment. I plan to change insurance and go back to my old doctor, but I can't do that until October. Meanwhile, with COVID and other issues, I feel I should do an initial exam with the new one just in case. It just feels wrong to ignore him and then ask for a doctor favor.
At church, I just got asked to serve as almost-a-deacon-but-not-really. Remember that class I took a month ago where I had two workbooks with a total of twelve to sixteen weeks of assignments, and an in-person class of be sensitive, don't drop the bread; don't spill the wine? Well, I"m was the only one dumb enough, I mean who cared enough to do the assignments, and our priest, who is legitimately swamped to the gills, really needs the help. We do have a deacon who will share the responsibility with me, but she's eighty years old with her own problems. Fortunately, she's an overachiever even at eighty years old. The job involves caring for people who are sick or have other problems. And our congregation is mostly elderly folks. (but it's a small church, thankfully) Kate and I don't have to do all the visits, meal delivery and trips to the hospital, etc.; we just have to make sure that someone does it.
If you haven't figured it out, I'm lazy. I'm used to a more vegetative life style. I'm also really good at forgetting things. Oy, vey!
Okay, done ranting. Wish me luck.
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Old 05-10-2022, 10:42 AM   #534
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Default Suffering from the Dip

Hello Steppers,

Seth Godin would likely call what you suffer from as The Dip. May be time for triage.
Seth:
Quote:
Stick with the Dips that are likely to pan out, and quit the Cul-de-Sacs to focus your resources.

Theres not a lot to say about the Cul-de-Sac except to realize that it exists and to embrace the fact that when you find one, you need to get off it, fast. Thats because a dead end is keeping you from doing something else. The opportunity cost of investing your life in something thats not going to get better is just too high.

Winners quit all the time. They just quit the right stuff at the right time.
Dips suck sewage water, for sure. Triage means you have to abandon some maybes. But, triage out the right stuff and you feel it. Anne Truitt:

Quote:
The hallmark of a decision in line with ones inner development is a feeling of having laid down a burden and picked up a more natural responsibility. Anne Truitt (Daybook: The Journal of an Artist)
Related topic: The Hard Thing Rule by Angela Duckworth
I keep cycling back through my dips. I have a 8 x 8 grid project I abandoned. Outlines for books to write that I let languish.

Part of it keys to whether someone else cares and will hold me to accounts. I try to avoid that.

Or, say I finish something and it gets attacked or, worse, ignored, by those I thought to be my audience?

The funny thing, though, is that even not finished it's still 100% my own. I can't say, about my grid, that it's only 37% mine. Who claims the other 63%? Well, they better hop to it!

Revu2
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Old 05-17-2022, 11:06 AM   #535
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Default Annoyed Anonymous

Dallying before getting to the day's tasks, which are:
  • Rough In a guide for a project
  • create agenda format and add some items
  • look up first-person accounts of dealing with feeling annoyed (lots of 2nd person, apparently the people who write these advice tips have no experience with it)
  • business call this afternoon
  • pick up food run right after
  • bridge! from 6 to 11

I think Buddhism and Stoicism are bonkers with their let go of the outcome maxims. This translates into cede the outcome to people who care about the outcome! Give away ones agency and persistence!

Alright, I have to go sit under a tree. R
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Old 05-19-2022, 10:32 PM   #536
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Default Re: A few Measly Steps a Day

Re your comment about Buddhism and Stoicism - I like the Serenity Prayer. God grant me serenity to accept what I cannot change, courage to change what I can, and wisdom to know the difference.
The serenity part is easy for me. The courage and the wisdom - that's where I need help.
I'm suddenly finding myself doing things and meeting people. Social anxiety is kicking in. I need to be busy and I need to interact with people. I know that. It keeps me from being depressed. Oh well. My jury duty snafu seems to fixed. I got a letter saying I was excused. Right now, I'm gardening more and writing less. My book club is reading "Through Unfamiliar Waters" for our next meeting. I read it and got bored.
Good wishes.
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Old 05-21-2022, 10:56 AM   #537
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Default All Riled Up

Just had a flash insight: what if I treated communication like I do trading? When trading nothing's a sure bet, so I parcel my bet sizes and if of a sudden I'm quickly "over rewarded" according to what I expected, I thank the market and exit.

The reverse, I'm holding a losing trade, I have to convince myself that I'm missed judged and limit my self criticism AND leave.

Just so with my expectations of people. I suspect "wise friends" who counsel don't get invested in what other people do aren't really trying to make something happen and, literally, and blowing hot air at me.

So, when things seem to be going to expectations, put some of that good feeling into "cash" and carry on with the rest. When going poorly, maybe go into "all cash" and walkaway emotionally.

Something to play around with. R.
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Old 05-24-2022, 01:40 AM   #538
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Default Joanne Harris's Writing Process

Hello Steppers, I'm reading Joanne Harris's Chocalat right now, and for diversion search out her writing process. She's written 25 books in a pile of genres, plus opera librettos and plays. And she's in a band! She says:

I always have several projects on the go, that is normal for me, and they are often quite different which means I can jump from one thing to another, she says. I will write in spurts and then let it rest for a few weeks or months and during that time I will work on something else. It also means that when I do need to stop or need to do some research Im not in the position of not working on something that can make you quite nervous, that I might not have another idea, so this way, I make sure that never happens. Yorkshire Post

She write in spurts and lets things rest. Not at all like John Steinbeck who kept at one novel till he finished it. In her advice to other writers she knows one size doesn't fit all: I think people have such different processes some writers like to work on an overarching outline, others, like me, work more organically. I always think that if you end up with the book you wanted to write then whatever your approach is, its right for you.

When you have something to get done, whatever approach that gets you through is your right approach. Permission accepted.
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