[ThisPuzzlesDeadInside]

My poetry... tell me what u think
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You

My only fear is of you
And what you put me through.
I fear the day I see you.
I fear of what I might do
I fear the smell of youre cologne
I fear going outside alone
I fear the feel of your hands
I fear my scream as I land
I fear the sound of your voice
This was not my choice
It was all you
Now you see what you do
Do you really want to see
How crazy you made me
All because of that one night
The night I lost all sight
In what was going on
I want my fear of you gone
It will never be
Forever it will remain in me
The memories will go away
Although you leave I will stay
Not knowing the rest of our lives
Just knowing we’ll say good-by
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Every Day You're Gone

Every day you're gone I'm gonna think about you,
And all the stuff we've went through.
I'll think about the times we shared,
The laughter and tears,
The joy and fears,
The screaming and fighting,
And the all night lighting.
The things I'll miss
Include your kiss,
Upon my lips.
The way you held me
Through joy and sorrow
Show me there will be a tomorrow.
I'll reminisce about the past,
And how I hope our love will always last
I'll remember the look in your eyes
When we say our good-by.
Baby just remember that I love you,
And I know we will make it through.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why me?

You sat there and called me your friend
You said you’d be there for me till the end
You always helped me through
I needed someone like you
But you turned around and did this to me
I liked you so much
Now you’re so hard to trust
I just want to know why
Why do you make me cry?
I’m waiting for that day
The day where all is grey
The day where I say so long
The day I show you that what you did was wrong
That day is nearing
I hope it is what you are fearing
Everyday I cry for you
See what you put me through?
Are you happy you got your way?
Is it supposed to feel this way?
Does this always bring you pain?
Or am I just that insane
Letting go is what I should do
It’s hard with what you put me through
This just isn’t fair
It’s more than I can seem to bear
But you’re not worth my time
I need to get you off my mind
The only thing I can do
Is forget about you
Forget our good times and our bad
Forget all the great fun we had
But I have to move on
I have to make my feelings for you be gone
Well I guess this is the end
You were a good friend
But you did me wrong
So it’s time to say so long
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When life starts without you and me,
and I'm not there to see;
If the sun should rise and find your eyes
all filled with tears for me;
I wish so much you wouldn't hurt
the way you did today,
While thinking of the many things,
we didn't get to say.
Before it seemed impossible,
but it’s now coming true.
I never thought I would do it,
but I’m walking away from you.
I had so much love to give,
and so much life to live.
But now with just the memory
I realize I loved you so dearly.
For all the fights, and times you made me mad,
I still can’t forget the great times we had.
Those moments will never be forgotten,
and will hold a special place in my heart.
For in my heart I know we can never be apart.
Please don’t forget me and how much love I have for you,
Because I do believe our love will always last,
No matter what problems we’ve had in our past.
And for every time you think of me and you
I am right there in your heart thinking of us too.
But when life starts without you and me,
Please try to understand,
That I didn’t want it to end like this,
Without a hug or special kiss.
You have to know that this is for the better
And its time for us to move on
Though our love shall always stay,
In our dreams far away.
So that’s where I’ll be,
Smiling in your arms while you sing to me.
You can find me, it’s not hard to see,
Just come into my dreams and be with me.
If I beg then I can’t choose
And If I choose then I’ll loose,
All the dreams I have of you.
But Its better then what I have,
Because what I have is nothing at all.
I don’t have you or your love,
I’m back at the start
Where I just want it all.
But of all the dreams I could ever dream,
the fact still stands I walked away;
I walked away from my lover
An unending nightmare it seems to me,
To see you alone so happy and free
Its just not the same,
You’re supposed to be here next to me.
Its not fair it never is,
My heart is still yours and will always be.
I wont forget that day
Or the rest of our yesterdays
The good ones and the bad
I wont forget the love we shared
And the great fun we had.
But there were times you did bad things
Things you knew you shouldn’t do.
I still loved you anyways
For my love still stands for always
So when life starts without you and me,
Don't think we're far apart,
For every time you think of me,
I'm right here, in your heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I fall to the floor while blood runs through my vein.
All i can feel is my body jerking in pain.
Staring at the ceiling waiting for death!
I feel like every last second could be my last breath.
All while thinking why am i here??
I keep living my life in fear.
The fear of falling in love and being hurt.
But what do ya know i fell in love with a jerk!
Why is life so hard?
I feel like i have nothing left to guard.
Do i have anything left to give?
Why should i live?
Around you theres always a smile on my face.
When we part the smile is erased.
Everyday i cry.
Wishing i could fall over and die.
While I think of all the things you said
All i want is to be dead
I lay here and scream,
Fading off into a dream,
Of the fantasy that never came true,
All because of you,
You broke my heart,
It tore me apart,
Now I’m dying for you,
And for the love that never fell through.
I know you feel alone now im gone.
This is my way of telling you to move on.
I want to tell you before i die.
And do me a favor and dont cry.
I love with all my heart.
Im sorry that our love fell apart.
As you read this note you begin to tear.
I can feel your body rising in fear.
When you open the door
You'll see that our love is no more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sissy

You've been with me through thick and thin
You helped me when i was stuck at dead ends
Im lucky to have a sister like you
After all we been through
I know we will make it in life
So please put down that knife
One day our pains will go away
I'll help you along the way
I'll take you wherever you want to go
Does how much I care show?
Its bad enough dad wants to die
I need you here by my side
To help me through
I need a sister like you
I love you with all my heart
I hope we never grow apart!

Written with all my love to my big sister Ashley STAY STRONG!!!!!!!!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chris Jones

I really do hate you
For all the %#@&#! you put me through
Why did you choose me?
I guess you want to see me bleed
I want you to see
What you’re doing to me
I want my life to be easy again
I want your life to end
I want a lot of things to be done
Only if I had a gun
To take care of it all
To make you fall
Watch you bleed
Make you see
How big of a jerk you are
That day isn’t too far
What you did was wrong
And it wont be long
Before you get what you deserve
Your such a freaking perv!
No matter what you always get your way
Even if it does bring pain my way
I cant believe you did this
All I wanted was a kiss
Was I screaming rape me?
No I said get off of me
Do you know what that means
Sex is what you fiend
Whether they want it or not
You need to be shot
Right in the head
I’ll send you to your death bed
This is how I feel about you
And what you put me through
Stupid me still cares for you
Don’t know why I just do
What happened to the old you
What happened to the caring you
That side of you is gone
Now my “love” for you is gone
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My most recent one.....

"battle called love"

All these thoughts rum through my head
as I lie here in my bed
I think about suicide
I think about how i want to die
Most of all I think about him
I think about the good times and the bad
I think about all the fun we had
I think about the thinks we shared
And the times he cared
I think about everything
even the things that mean nothing
I think about the things I miss
I think about his kiss
I think about the way he held me
I think about how things used to be
I think about his touch
God i miss him so much
But this is the way it has to be
All because he couldnt see
The love i had to give
Now im thinking why should I live
They tell me death isnt the answer
So what is the answer
The answer to me and him
Either way I wont win
All i can think about is dying
After all the lying
we have done
But me dying is showing he has won
So as i go on living
As I go on giving
my love to him
Neither one of us will win
in this battle called Love
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Theres some of them so tell me what you think! they are really deep but all thought

[ickydog2006]

They are good. I'm not sure I would have put them in the SI forum...but they were worth reading.

[Rapunzel]

Lots of strong feelings there. I like the one you wrote for your sister best. Is there a reason that you wanted the poems to be on this forum? If so, that's ok. SI is really more about feelings than anything else, and expressing your feelings in a healthy way, like writing, is something to encourage. Thanks for sharing this with us.

[ThisPuzzlesDeadInside]

I put em in here bc they were the ones i wrote when i was cutting or carving, pretty much when i was bleeding

[ThisPuzzlesDeadInside]

and thanks