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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2003
Location: Chicago
Posts: 2,134
20 
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Dec 15, 2005 at 04:03 PM
#1
I realized today that it has been one month yesterday since I last cut! The last time was two little ones the day before I met my new pdoc. He gave me Adderall and I haven't cut since! I saw my T last night and when he learned that I still haven't cut, he said, "Stay on it!" Guess that's orders, LOL. There have been moods where I know I would have cut, but I don't have the urges to anymore. My scars are healing and don't itch too much anymore. The coloring is kind of like dark purple-pink bruises now. I want to think "former cutter" but I am cautiously optimistic. How do I know that I won't feel the urges again when I am stressed? I don't know.
__________________ My life and being formerly homeless 
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2005
Location: Kansas
Posts: 3,841
18
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Dec 15, 2005 at 04:23 PM
#2
Inky,
How about reprogramming your brain, with a substitute behavior for when you get stressed? Like: going for a walk, eating popcorn, singing a favorite song or punching a pillow. Hugs, Jane |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2005
Location: Kansas
Posts: 3,841
18
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Dec 15, 2005 at 04:30 PM
#3
Inky,
Came up with another substitute behavior --drive to my house. Jane - Oz |
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Grand Member
Member Since Feb 2005
Posts: 514
19 |
Dec 15, 2005 at 04:33 PM
#4
Ink - from experience, when you get stressed, you're going to get the urge. so just expect it. but when you do, take into consideration how long you've gone without cutting and how great you feel when you haven't. its much easier to give into cutting than not doing it - taking the easy route now would be no good! plus, once you get into the routine of NOT cutting when you get stressed, it becomes easier and easier to find something else to do. trust me on this one.
good luck, let us know how everything pans out! __________________ "Next, don't go to Europe to 'find yourself.' Who told you you were over there anyway?" -The Colbert Report on 'Things Not To Do After Graduating College' |
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Grand Member
Member Since Jan 2005
Location: state of desperation
Posts: 799
19 31 hugs
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Dec 15, 2005 at 08:11 PM
#5
 Congrats on the one month, inkblot!! Stick with it, I'm rooting for ya!
__________________  complic8d"Don't say I'm out of touch with this rampant chaos-your reality I know well what lies beyond my secret refuge The nightmare I built my own world to escape." ♥evanescence♥
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Grand Member
Member Since May 2004
Location: Inside myself
Posts: 986
20
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Dec 15, 2005 at 11:03 PM
#6
Good job on your one month SI free!!
 
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Member
Member Since Nov 2005
Posts: 101
18 |
Dec 16, 2005 at 02:17 AM
#7
congrats! I think, on some level, wondering "what if" will always be part of that kind of thinking... but with time and with learning new coping mechanisms and being able to deal with your emotions & more conflict in situations will slowly decrease those urges... as you said, there's been situations where you've felt like cutting or would have in the past but the desire isn't really there anymore. that's a good thing! I got to that point before where in my mind I would want to cut but just couldn't get myself to do so, I wanted it but it didn't feel right... I just couldn't justify it. I think the thing that made me go back was not being able to deal with other stressors. but If you can stick with that mind set then all power to you! Maybe with therapy and your meds and finding new ways you will be able to do this. don't worry too much of the what if's... you can't control the future but you can control how you react to events in the present. wish you all the best.
__________________  "Courage consists in holding on just one moment longer." Albert Payson Terhune |
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Veteran Member
Member Since Jan 2004
Location: minnesota usa
Posts: 565
20 33 hugs
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Dec 16, 2005 at 03:00 AM
#8
<font color="#008800">My therapist told me the last time that I saw her, I can cut if I really want to but then I would have to come 'here' and still face the emotions I trying to surpress and the fact that I cut. For now I feel like that would be too much work. It has been a long time since I cut. I think last time was in September. </font>
__________________ dalila Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere. -Erma Bombeck |
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Magnate
Member Since Mar 2004
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 2,944
20
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Dec 16, 2005 at 10:30 AM
#9
Yay! I'm so proud of you! It sounds like this medication is really working for you then. I wish I could find something that would suppress my urges, by ah, no luck.
Just keep taking the meds, hang in there, and just keep doing what you're doing! __________________ "When they discover the center of the universe, a lot of people will be disappointed to discover they are not it." -Bernard Bailey |
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Junior Member
Member Since Dec 2005
Location: Madison, WI
Posts: 15
18 3 hugs
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Dec 16, 2005 at 11:13 PM
#10
((((((((((((((Inky
 )))))))))))))))))))))One month? Super excellent The downside is the SI is considered an addiction, just like bulimia, alcohol, etc. The urges WILL come, but you know where to come........you're always here for you during "those times" In the meanwhile, CELEBRATE   Prismatic9 
__________________ To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world --Anonymous |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Oct 2002
Location: NW Arkansas
Posts: 3,734
21 14 hugs
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Dec 23, 2005 at 01:23 PM
#11
Congrats Inky!!! I'm proud of you. I know how hard it is to resist the urges when they come. Just remember we care about you and hate to see you hurting so to see an accomplishment like this is awesome. WOOHOO!!!
__________________ I appreciate long walks especially when taken by people who annoy me. Noel Coward |
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