[osamanda15]

I have no way of coping.. Nobody to talk to.
I always claim that I cut myself, but I never have.
I wanted to, but I always got too scared.
I'm really scared that one day I will get over that, and will do it.
The other night, I was really close...but how else do i get through it?

[puzzclar]

Have you tried exercise. It can help for a little bit of time, but that little bit could get you through it. And I am like you, I haven't cut, but I still want too. I have a similar fear, that some day I will. But that time is not here yet, so just give things time. Things will get better.

There are ways to cope, and you can find people here to talk too. If you need someone, I'll be there for you. We may get close to wanting to cut, but as long as we tell ourselves that we will not cut, it wont happen. If you don't want to, you wont start. Take it from someone who hasn't cut ever, but I do use other methods to cope.

If you need anything, and want someone to talk to, I'll be there for you.

I hope you can figure out a way not to go down that route. It's not a good coping mechanism - it may make you feel better temporarily because of the endorphins, but the feeling doesn't last, trust me. And then you're likely left with some unsightly scars at some point because you will probably end up going too far with it, cutting too deep in times of great distress - even if you promised yourself you would stay in control and only cut 'a little'. Try to get those endorphins some other way if you can, like exercise. If you think you're suffering with depression or anxiety, please seek treatment from a doctor if you aren't already. I recommend speaking to a counsellor if possible too if this is something you've not already done - it really does help. Having somebody to talk to, who can listen, understand, and give you constructive advice... well, I've found it to be very healing.

Best wishes

[osamanda15]

thanks to both of you! it means a lot.
about the exercise, i do. i dance 4 nights a week, from 430 to 930.
i have the highs of the highs, and the lows of the lows.
i'm never in between or just neutral.
i also posted in depression, titled: please please please read.
it has a lot.. but thanks

[Sannah]

You wrote in your other thread that you don't trust your counselors to talk to them. Are they therapists?