Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Sep 29, 2012, 05:46 PM
ConcreteGirl ConcreteGirl is offline
New Member
 
Member Since: Sep 2012
Posts: 3
Yes, I am a cutter, a hitter, a burner, a hair puller. Yes, I may be a creep or what my mother used to call me, "a freak". I love to cut myself with razorblades, kitchen knives, plastic knives, pieces of broken glass or mirror, scrap metal, combs or anything that I can find. As I reflect over my childhood I see it as being a dark nightmare tainted in blood and bruises. Burns strewn about my limbs. My poor child body, poor child skin mottled with lacerations, scars, black and blue marks and burns from cigarettes or from curling irons. I was a little girl scared and afraid of my parents and mostly, almost more painfully, myself. When I get home from school will I hurt myself again today? I remember when I was about 15 years old I took a rock from the outside garden and carried it to my room. There I repeatedly smashed the rock into my forehead, pounding away at my frontal lobe cortex, why? To try and kill my identity so I could be someone else. I caused scrapes and hematomas on my head that my mother kept asking me about. "So, I don't have to be your daughter anymore, Mom.", was the silent reply in my heart.
Now that I am a young woman, I look in the mirror and realize, that through all the cutting, stitches, burns, blisters, bruises and hair pulling, I realize that I am none of these. I am not a cutter, even if I did so, I'm not a hitter, even if I did it, I'm not a burner, even if I burned myself, I'm not a hair puller. I'm just me.
I'm just ConcreteGirl.
Hugs from:
Angelornot, Idiot17, shezbut

advertisement
  #2  
Old Sep 30, 2012, 02:28 AM
greyclouds's Avatar
greyclouds greyclouds is offline
Grand Member
 
Member Since: Feb 2012
Location: Some where
Posts: 851
Stay strong cc, and keep posting if it helps xx
  #3  
Old Oct 01, 2012, 09:05 AM
Sannah's Avatar
Sannah Sannah is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Jul 2008
Posts: 19,179
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........

I'm an ISFJ
  #4  
Old Oct 02, 2012, 04:45 PM
ConcreteGirl ConcreteGirl is offline
New Member
 
Member Since: Sep 2012
Posts: 3
Thank you! I'll stay strong, it's just some days are easier to be weak than others and harder to be strong too. But I'll keep trying.
Hugs from:
Sannah
Reply
Views: 259

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:02 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.