[GenCat]

***TRIGGER WARNING***
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It’s a rush. I am feeling full of emotions, brought to my attention from the cut. Slowly, I loose myself in the cut, with the motion of my hand, holding the metal blade, going back and forth, deeper and deeper. I must see blood, I must get that rush of pain that depressed joy of knowing I did this, that I am in control of what is happening, of this emotion I am feeling. I slice deeper and deeper, feeling every sting of the cold metal blade. I will never get satisfied, I will never stop this torture. I must feel, I must be punished, I must release my anger…deeper and deeper I will go. A rush comes with a gush of blood. I’ve hit gold! I’ve reached my satisfactory point finally. I can’t feel anymore, I can’t see the blade for the blood, I smile and lay there. Watching the blood flow down onto the floor. I feel good, I feel much happier. I close my eyes as tears begin to roll down my cheeks. My hearts pounding, full an anxiety. My pulse slows and I drift away into paradise, there all alone on the cold, bloody floor. I am at peace.

[DePressMe]

Hey GenCat...cutting is a difficult thing to manage...the intense feelings and thoughts...please take care of yourself.....D.