[SheHulk07]

Last week I saw my T, and admitted to SH 3 times in one week, where I've been basically only doing it once since I got out of the hospital in May. He flat out told me that if I start doing it every day again, deeper or more frequent in 1 day, that he'll admit me again. He also asked me if I'd be okay with seeing the nurse at the facility every week to show her any places. I agreed to that, but I honestly don't know if I can keep a hold on the SH with majoring things happening right now.

That seems WAY out of line for him to say....

That only motivates you to either:
A) Lie to him about it (preventing you from getting help from him)
B) Stop SH when you are not ready which could cause you to do worse things.
C) Lash out
D) Cave to him and make you feel that you have no control.

YOU have to be the ultimate judge, but I think you need a "better" therapist.

And all that for SH three times in a week.?.?.?
I have done every day.... I have done (literally) over 5,000 cuts in a single day - and NONE of those were enough to have me locked up. Your doctor seems to be pushing you very hard.

[winter4me]

I think you need to be working with a therapist who understands much better how to work with SH. You need to be Given control over your behavior, not have that control taken by others. Try some online search for counselors in the area who use DBT, CBT, or other therapeutic models that address learning ways to change/modify your own thoughts and actions. It is just an opinion, but I do have a good background in working with SH, and the worst outcomes I have seen are connected to over-control, too much time in the hospital, and the emphasis of shame in forcing you to display your wounds to others. You can do an online search, or even contact the local MH center to ask about folks who specialize in this, and what resources they have that you might be able to use.
Maybe someone here can recommend some good reading too---my brain is not quite awake. Hang in there.

[ThisWayOut]

I think I would be more concerned with what is going on to cause the self-harm rather than the self-harm itself unless it becomes a life-threatening issue. Have you guys been able to come up with alternate coping methods? Are the underlying issues being addresses? Do you feel your therapist is warrented in his concern over the increasing self-harm? I know mine goes very quickly from "this is somethign that helps me get through the day" to "oh ****, I really need help with containment". Knowing that about me, I could understand if my therapist confronted me with a similar ultimatum, though I would hope that she would try to help me find alternate coping skills. The only thing hospitals really do is physical containment. While that's very much needed at times, it rarely helps chronic self-harm because it doesn;t address what's going on underneath. I hope you will be able to talk to your T about your concerns with his stance. Maybe you guys could come to a better understanding. If that doesn't help, maybe it would be a good idea to look for another T?

[SheHulk07]

I'm seeing 2 different therapists and they both have stated similar things. It goes back to when I stabbed myself, he's concerned that with everything going on that I will start doing it worse again. He said if I go back to doing it every day, because that's when we know things are getting out of control for me. I agree with his decision, I'm not mad at him about it and I've still been telling him if I cut or not.

[ThisWayOut]

Originally Posted by AmyFed07

I'm seeing 2 different therapists and they both have stated similar things. It goes back to when I stabbed myself, he's concerned that with everything going on that I will start doing it worse again. He said if I go back to doing it every day, because that's when we know things are getting out of control for me. I agree with his decision, I'm not mad at him about it and I've still been telling him if I cut or not.

I would hazard saying that their concern is understandable then. They want to make sure you are safe. If you quickly decompensate to serious sh, the hospital would be the safest option. Sometimes there's only so much you can do outpatient... Is there anything you can do to work on containment before you hit that major crisis point? I know making an honest list of all that I get out of self-injury over the weekend helped me understand it better. It also helped my T and I work on some alternate ways to get what I need. I did have to write the list thinking I would never show her though. Too much of what is on there I consider very shameful. If I thought I would be showing her, I would not have been able to be honest with myself about it.