[gwenlian]

I was hypomanic yesterday and cut in the afternoon, while at the time I thought much ado was being made about nothing I knew that this meant inpatient for me. Last night I crashed, hard. Called the psych hospital to make an appt to be evaluated today and had the guy on the other end of the line almost yelling at me to get myself to the nearest crisis center. Made it through the night with only a few urges and only one I had to wake my husband up for. Called the psych hospital this morning to make an evaluation appt and was asked the usual questions and was told that I would probably not be admitted because my self harm was mild (only deep scratches, no stitches or bandaids), I did not at that moment feel like hurting myself nor was I suicidal at that moment.

I've been catching myself all morning scratching my arms and having to stop before I removed the top layer of skin and wishing more and more often that this would all end. Who knows, maybe that will be enough for them to keep me but I'm afraid of what I might do if left to my own devices.

[jazzbella18]

I feel like the hospital should be able to keep you. If you are feeling to the point that you are going to hurt yourself and need a medication change or something they should not judge and listen to you about how you are struggling. Best Wishes.