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Default May 24, 2007 at 03:53 PM
  #1
crimson tears pouring down

thought i was strong enough to fight but I wasnt

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Default May 24, 2007 at 04:09 PM
  #2
I'm sorry ... Anything you want to talk about?

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Default May 24, 2007 at 04:33 PM
  #3
no point, i'm not worth it

I just let everyone down

thinking i was ok, who was i trying to kid???
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Default May 24, 2007 at 04:41 PM
  #4
You are worth it...

Sometimes things blind side us even if we think is going ok.

Anything recently blind side you?

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Default May 24, 2007 at 05:25 PM
  #5
cant think of anything

who was i trying to kid tho, thinking i could beat this, i might as well let the darkness consume me
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Default May 24, 2007 at 05:33 PM
  #6
trying to kid - don't beat yourself up over this. I slip - it happens - at least you are still posting that will keep some light going so darkness cannot consume you.

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Default May 24, 2007 at 05:34 PM
  #7
doesnt mean i dont want thedarkness, it looks so tempting
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Default May 24, 2007 at 05:40 PM
  #8
I know very tempting at times...

Anyone IRL you can be with?

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Default May 24, 2007 at 05:42 PM
  #9
husband has just gone to bed. just me and my blades now
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Default May 24, 2007 at 05:45 PM
  #10
Good time to wake him up...give him the blades and ask him to dispose of them.

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Default May 24, 2007 at 05:51 PM
  #11
cant wake him up, he will be angry, the darkness can wait one more day
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Default May 24, 2007 at 05:54 PM
  #12
If you can deal with darkness - you have the strength to deal with angry...right?

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Default May 24, 2007 at 05:55 PM
  #13
no, cant hurt him again, cant make him angry, cant fight him tonight
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Default May 24, 2007 at 05:59 PM
  #14
Write it down - that you don't want to hurt him. You feel darkness - put it in an envelope with the blades...and wake him up - he needs to know what you are going through again.

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Default May 24, 2007 at 06:07 PM
  #15
cant tell him, he will be angry, cant do it, dont want to hurt him, he'll say "i thought u werent doing that anymore" cant tell him
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Default May 24, 2007 at 06:12 PM
  #16
I'm not going to push you on it any further - I do hope someday you will be able to share with your husband...that is what he and I (meaning men) are suppose to do...love in sickness or in health?

You can just take the blades and dispose of them (not in the house garbage - of course)

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Default May 24, 2007 at 06:16 PM
  #17
i have put them back in their box, no more, for tonight anyway
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Default May 24, 2007 at 06:18 PM
  #18
Good...try to get some rest

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Default May 24, 2007 at 06:21 PM
  #19
sleeping on the sofa tonight, cant go to bed, will try to get some sleep, night

(sorry)
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Default May 24, 2007 at 07:02 PM
  #20
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