[stayingafloat]

Its been a long while. Things never look up ever since I got warded last time for suicide attempt. It felt like a punishment, and i came out a worst person than before.

Almost everyone out there were looking to prey on my emotional vulnerabilities after i got out. I was gossiped maliciously and used for laughter everywhere. It accumulated and almost spiralled out of control at one point in time. They just wont leave me alone in their malicious conversations.

I have been planning on stabbing myself to end it all at somewhere remote, depending on how things go.

[SlumberKitty]

Hi Stayingafloat, it sounds like you are in a really bad space right now. I'm sorry you were gossiped about and laughed at. That's terrible and you don't deserve it. I'm hoping you can reach out to someone IRL because you sound like you are in a really not good place, so call a hotline or talk to a priest or someone you can trust. Don't end it all because of some malicious gossip. Don't let them win. Keep talking here. We're listening. HUGS HUGS HUGS Kit

[stayingafloat]

They will keep pursue me till they get the daily amusement and entertainment that they desperately crave for in their lives. Its more than just malicious gossip. I have been the target of covert harrassment and community stalking that has been ongoing for a long time. People can recognize me and will inform others when they notice me, even in the neighborhood, which they will then deliberately make some gestures or noises to agitate me. I dont understand what makes their intentions justified, even if i did no harm to them. They will pursue me till the end anyway.
Thanks SlumberKitty.

[stayingafloat]

On a brighter note, my meds are keeping the depressive symptoms at bay for the time being.

[StripedTapir]

i'm so sorry you have to deal with such horrible people
i really hope you can find a friend to talk to and make you feel a bit better.
wishing you the best x