[Buffy01]

Is there a coping skill that I could do instead of headbanging. Or pulling hair? I been head banging since I could remember. I would like to stop. When I head bang is use a punishment.

[Skeezyks]

Head banging is something I have great familiarity with... unfortunately. I grew up "bumping" my head at night to go to sleep. In fact, I used to have a picture of myself that was taken when I was around 2 years old I'd estimate. In the picture I had a round bald spot in the middle of my hairline where the hair had been worn away from bumping my head. (I've also been a hair puller.)

I want to warn you, repeated head banging is a dangerous practice. I developed Meniere's Disease (a condition of the inner ear) & tinnitus as a result of my life-long head banging. I've also been treated for a detached retina. I can't say for sure that this was related to my head banging. But I believe it was.

I don't know of any particular coping skill for head banging... or hair pulling either for that matter. When I finally stopped battering my head was when I developed tinnitus as a result of it. Unfortunately, at that point, it was too late to do anything about it.

One thing I do, that perhaps helps a bit is that I massage my scalp. I do it because I'm an older man now & I'm trying to keep my scalp loose so it doesn't turn into a slab of concrete & cause what little bit of hair I have left on top of my head to fall out. However I do think that the practice of massaging my scalp also helps give me something to do besides pull hair or other similar sorts of things.

[IowaFarmGal]

Now that the stress of work and caring for Mom is done I seem to have stopped banging my head. I think grounding techniques they taught in class may have helped some. Mine had to do with failing tasks or being yelled at or verbally abused.

[possum220]

Have a cold shower for as long as you can stand it. I mean no hot water at all. It will release endorphins that the head banging is currently doing. Banging your head in the long term will leave you and others with a very visual reminder.

Also seeking help for the reason you need to punish yourself would be a good idea.

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by Skeezyks

Head banging is something I have great familiarity with... unfortunately. I grew up "bumping" my head at night to go to sleep. In fact, I used to have a picture of myself that was taken when I was around 2 years old I'd estimate. In the picture I had a round bald spot in the middle of my hairline where the hair had been worn away from bumping my head. (I've also been a hair puller.)

I want to warn you, repeated head banging is a dangerous practice. I developed Meniere's Disease (a condition of the inner ear) & tinnitus as a result of my life-long head banging. I've also been treated for a detached retina. I can't say for sure that this was related to my head banging. But I believe it was.

I don't know of any particular coping skill for head banging... or hair pulling either for that matter. When I finally stopped battering my head was when I developed tinnitus as a result of it. Unfortunately, at that point, it was too late to do anything about it.

One thing I do, that perhaps helps a bit is that I massage my scalp. I do it because I'm an older man now & I'm trying to keep my scalp loose so it doesn't turn into a slab of concrete & cause what little bit of hair I have left on top of my head to fall out. However I do think that the practice of massaging my scalp also helps give me something to do besides pull hair or other similar sorts of things.

okay. I am eighty percent deaf in both of my ears that had happen since i started talking.

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by IowaFarmGal

Now that the stress of work and caring for Mom is done I seem to have stopped banging my head. I think grounding techniques they taught in class may have helped some. Mine had to do with failing tasks or being yelled at or verbally abused.

My mom was mentally and physically abusive s toward me. This was a coping skill as a punishment. I never thought about grounding technique.

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by possum220

Have a cold shower for as long as you can stand it. I mean no hot water at all. It will release endorphins that the head banging is currently doing. Banging your head in the long term will leave you and others with a very visual reminder.

Also seeking help for the reason you need to punish yourself would be a good idea.

I am currently looking for help. I never thought about taking a cold shower. I haven't found anyone who will take my health insurance.

[possum220]

Having a cold shower for as long as I could tolerate it was suggested to me by my psychiatrist and a long term counsellor. I was told to stay in there for as long as my body could tolerate it. Also holding frozen ice again for as long as you can is another one.

Here are some more suggestions. Hope you can find some-one who will take your insurance.

https://www.healingfromcomplextrauma....com/grounding

[Fuzzybear]

Showers ugh nope nope nope .... but a nice river with salmon ...

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by possum220

Having a cold shower for as long as I could tolerate it was suggested to me by my psychiatrist and a long term counsellor. I was told to stay in there for as long as my body could tolerate it. Also holding frozen ice again for as long as you can is another one.

Here are some more suggestions. Hope you can find some-one who will take your insurance.

https://www.healingfromcomplextrauma....com/grounding

I never tried the cold shower before. Or using ice. But I am thinking about using ice. Thank you for your advice.

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

Showers ugh nope nope nope .... but a nice river with salmon ...

I usually take cold shower in the summer but that is because it is so hot. Grouphugs.

[Under*Over]

Meditation?

Any form of self punishment... its just not a good thing and you dont deserve it.

Thats what I tell myself to keep myself from it. I used to cut, head bang, bite myself, wrist bang, use lighters... the worst. And it was so hard to stop...

But its so important to stop. Because you arent evil or awful or anything like tbat (I know because I used to tell myself the same thing) and you DONT deserve this.

Maybe this wont be enough to get you to consider just... quitting cold turkey. But I hope you do. I really do.

What helped me do that- when the addiction was powerful- was remind myself I didnt deserve it but ALSO... Id give myself persmission to do it. But always later. Like, I cant self harm now, but can in an hour. And then an hour later go- I cant self harm now but CAN tomorrow. And keep going. Always tellint yourself later, instead of never, makes things so much less... restrictive and black and white and just... difficulat and defeating

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by Under*Over

Meditation?

Any form of self punishment... its just not a good thing and you dont deserve it.

Thats what I tell myself to keep myself from it. I used to cut, head bang, bite myself, wrist bang, use lighters... the worst. And it was so hard to stop...

But its so important to stop. Because you arent evil or awful or anything like tbat (I know because I used to tell myself the same thing) and you DONT deserve this.

Maybe this wont be enough to get you to consider just... quitting cold turkey. But I hope you do. I really do.

What helped me do that- when the addiction was powerful- was remind myself I didnt deserve it but ALSO... Id give myself persmission to do it. But always later. Like, I cant self harm now, but can in an hour. And then an hour later go- I cant self harm now but CAN tomorrow. And keep going. Always tellint yourself later, instead of never, makes things so much less... restrictive and black and white and just... difficulat and defeating

I never thought about meditation for self harm. I will try it.

[Buffy01]

Update! I need up today and start head banging again from all the emotional pain I have.

[Buffy01]

I just start up again! Now I am worried about head trauma!