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Default Jul 19, 2022 at 01:05 PM
  #261
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Anyone ever wonder why one gets self destructive sometimes?

Ugh.
i do sometimes
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Default Jul 21, 2022 at 12:17 PM
  #262
Struggling this week both physically and emotionally. I definitely feel like I am going to relapse today. But maybe I can head it off.

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Default Jul 21, 2022 at 01:32 PM
  #263
Ack! I guess that turned into a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Default Jul 21, 2022 at 02:52 PM
  #264
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Default Jul 26, 2022 at 11:53 AM
  #265
Relapsed. Sigh. Sometimes I make such a mess of things. Sometimes I am such a mess.

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Default Jul 26, 2022 at 07:39 PM
  #266
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Default Aug 15, 2022 at 05:24 PM
  #267
Sigh. Having urges.

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Default Aug 15, 2022 at 05:25 PM
  #268
I sent my T a text to contract with her until I speak to her tomorrow. She hasn't responded yet. That's okay. She is probably busy. I just count it from the time that I send the text, as her agreement. I mean, what is she going to say, no? Hardly.

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Default Aug 15, 2022 at 05:52 PM
  #269
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Default Sep 01, 2022 at 02:58 PM
  #270
I went to my GP yesterday because I have been having shoulder pain. Full disclosure--I have been having shoulder pain for years but I have a high pain tolerance so I just ignored it and figured it was part of getting older. Well, then I started getting numbness and tingling in my arm and thumb. So after a few months of that I thought hmm. Maybe I better take care of it. So I went to my GP yesterday. She said it isn't my shoulder, that it is my neck. She said that my muscles surrounding my neck are really tight and tense. So she showed me some exercises to do, prescribed heat and a muscle relaxant, and then told me to get an x-ray but wait a week to see if these other things help. So okay, I'm glad that there is a plan in place. She said I could take Ibuprofen too if I wanted. She was going to give me a prescription for that but I was like, I can just take OTC.

But while I was there, she always does a mini-psych-eval. So she did that. And she made me show her my arms to make sure there wasn't any self harm. I know she is just trying to take care of me the best that she can but that kind of bothered me.

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Default Sep 01, 2022 at 03:08 PM
  #271
Kit deserves to not be making self harms and your dr knows that
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Default Sep 27, 2022 at 04:12 PM
  #272
I am kind of getting a bit of urges since my T canceled tonight. Hopefully they go away soon.

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Default Oct 05, 2022 at 05:06 PM
  #273
Argh. I'm definitely feeling like I am going to relapse. I am trying not to. But I feel it. It's in me. It's around me. It's on me. All the SH thoughts/feelings/urges....they are chasing me down and cornering me. I'm only going to be able to outrun them so long.

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Default Oct 06, 2022 at 02:43 AM
  #274
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Default Oct 06, 2022 at 04:52 PM
  #275
My T is not responding to any of my messages that talk about me feeling like I am going to relapse. Maybe she doesn't care if I do. How can I stop it if T doesn't even care if I go through with it.

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Default Oct 06, 2022 at 04:56 PM
  #276
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My T is not responding to any of my messages that talk about me feeling like I am going to relapse. Maybe she doesn't care if I do. How can I stop it if T doesn't even care if I go through with it.
we care, we dont want our Kit to relapse
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Default Oct 07, 2022 at 04:47 AM
  #277
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My T is not responding to any of my messages that talk about me feeling like I am going to relapse. Maybe she doesn't care if I do. How can I stop it if T doesn't even care if I go through with it.
What if T does care, but something serious is going on in her life that interferes with her from expressing that care at this moment?
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Default Oct 21, 2022 at 02:57 PM
  #278
Wanting to right now but I am trying to delay at least, or hopefully not give in. I am frustrated with my work situation (just a problem at work right now, not my entire job), I am feeling uncomfortable with my T because she hasn't rescheduled me from when she had to cut my session off at 20 minutes and I feel in limbo and I hate feeling in limbo, I have some social stress as we are going to some friend's house tomorrow for lunch and I don't know how that is going to go. I really need a mental health day. I am going to try to do that on Sunday.

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Default Oct 21, 2022 at 02:58 PM
  #279
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My T is not responding to any of my messages that talk about me feeling like I am going to relapse. Maybe she doesn't care if I do. How can I stop it if T doesn't even care if I go through with it.
When I said this, I meant that T was responding to everything else in the message but not responding to this part of it.

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Default Oct 22, 2022 at 03:00 PM
  #280

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