Welcome to the self injury room

Yes I agree It is not just kids who cut. I am 47 and have been cutting since I was 15. I agree it is wrong and not fair we have to struggle in this way....but it is not just a young peoples struggle.
Glad your here, I am new too and I am finding a lot of help and support here sure you will too.
take care

This is my first time here. . .I'm a a cutter. It is good to find a place where I can say that sort of out loud. I'm not sure what else to say.

Welcome Gracey. Hope you feel comfortable soon in talking and posting freely.
Again Welcome

Don't know what the 'trigger' item is or does but guess it must be something to do with not getting into graphic detail about one's S/H acts. Someone pls advise. I'm getting deeper into depression and within this is the absolute NEED to S/H in order to cope with internal feelings and punish myself for being evil and having this need to hurt myself. My family also don't understand any of my mental health concerns and I have stopped trying to get thro' to them. Any way I am 47 and have been a S/H since age19,so what do i really expect of my family, myself or anyone else. It is my problem but SOMETIMES I wish it wasn't.

Welcome to psych central, vortex. I hope that you find help here. There are lots of great people, and sometimes you just need to know that you're not alone and someone understands.

The trigger icon is one of the post icons (that appear in the message headings), like the book or note, or you can do a smiley, etc. Under "Post Icon" (drop-down menu) it is listed as "trig." I'll put one on this post just to show you what it looks like. Or let me know if you need help with it or forget, because I can go back in and add it later (or any of the mods for this forum).

It's best to avoid getting into graphic detail, as that can "trigger" people, or affect their feelings in a way that they are more likely to act out, or just have feelings that are hard to deal with. Sometimes you might need to discuss some subjects that someone might find triggering. There is no way we can avoid ever triggering each other in a forum like this. So, if you think that what you write might affect someone like that (particularly if it's about strong feelings, details, abuse, etc.), then it helps to use the trigger icon as a warning for people to know what they are getting into before they read the post. They can either be prepared for it, or not read it if they don't feel safe.

Rap

i s/h for yrs and then stopped for the last 8yrs but now the urge to do so is as strong as ever. i am in a vicious circle i am ashamed of my scars on my arms and will never wear short sleeves, i find this real difficult in hotweather. people comment on it. i reply i dont like to catch the sun.
i am so afraid that i am going to let these urges take over, what can i do
i am trying so hard to survive just feel like i am losing a battle

whoamI, I also used to S/H and have stopped for the last seven years..I too am incredibly ashamed of my scars..I wear a jacket to my work, I work for a law firm..I am afraid my boss will comment on it and fire me or something..I have had strong urges from time to time as well...as well as the flashbacks and even nightmares..I just keep myself focused on the fact that Ive come THIS far..SEVEN YEARS!! That is no small feat for a self injurer..every day is a struggle as you know..as we all know..I believe, unfortunately it will be a lifetime struggle for us all..but one that will ease as we learn to love ourselves more..and deal with our pain in the way that is best for us..self harm excluded. I work out now..I run till I can't run anymore..Get on my horse and ride..I even clean my house..LOL..whatever I have to do..to keep my mind occupied..and to keep myself busy..until the urges pass..and for now..this has been working. I haven't cut in seven years and God willing..I wont cut today either..If you ever need to talk..(((Hugs to you)))) Hang in there.. You have come so far..should you fall..you have friends to help pick you back up should you need it, but here's praying for another day!!!!

Hi I'm new here and I have I am 35 years old and I engage in self injurous behaviors. I have since I was 12 years old. I am so ashamed of telling people about it. I do have a therapist and he is great, but sometimes in therapy I will do something to self harm and I don't know if he just ignores it or doesn't care because he says nothing about it. I want to stop this behavior, but I have not found any coping skills that work for me. Help me please.

Are you SIing during sessions, or just letting him know about it. Many therapists won't pay a lot of attention specifically to SI because they don't want to encourage more of it (reinforce it), and because SI is a symptom, not a main issue. As you address your feelings and the reasons that you need to SI, it should get easier to stop.

You might also want to read through some of the other threads here. Sometimes you can find something that helps you in the discussions that have already taken place. Welcome to PC. I hope that we are able to help you here. Don't hesitate to jump right in and start your own threads so that it is easier for people to reply directly to you. If you need help, you can always PM me.

Rap

hi everyone! my name is sherri and I am kind of new here. i actually had an account in Feburary but decided against it. i self injury. I am an active member in the No Fear Safe group for about 3 years but I am getting no support there. I am proud to report I have been Self injury free for 6 months I stilll have a lot of urges and some nights it is a real struggle. Why do I self Injury? I have been severaly sexually abuse and really never got over it. What has helped me stop self injury for 6 months? I dont like to focus on the self injury behavior but the feelings behind it. Why do I want to do this? Try to understand that. I dont know what got me here tonight but I sure would like some support. Sherri

I'm not sure if i should write or not. I'm out of therapy currently and slipped up today - met up with a plastic wrap carton with teeth. =( Haven't quite made it 2 months without cutting but was doing well avoiding razors. But i could feel it building and knew i couldn't avoid sharp things forever. This was better than some other options, yes? Not that it is good to cut, but considering.... I never know how to deal with the urges. I don't feel it is serious enough to call a crisis line, and I've never had to go get stitches or anything, so i feel silly asking for help around it. Plus so many people think cutting is a way to get attention - and it's not! At least not for me. Very few people know i cut and my mom thinks i haven't cut in over 2 years! OK i'm feeling odd taking up space.
Kiya

Hi Kiya. Welcome to the community. You never have to worry about taking up space here. There's plenty of space to go around.

Thanks... I really ought to call a crisis line. I'm sinking ever faster into isolation & dispair and didn't remember to keep a life jacket. I just don't know what I'd tell them. I'm terrible talking on the phone even to my (former) T or minister. I want to connect in the chat rooms but i have to install the java update.... I don't want a crisis line to know who I am or think something troubling and send someone to my place.

until later...

I really like the little lambs in your picture =) they make me smile.
Kiya

Kiya, please call and get help if you need it. Or set up an appointment with a therapist (either your former one or a new one). I am more concerned about your despair than anything else. You don't have to live that way.

Hope to see you in chat soon.

Rap

Self-injury can come in many forms such as, overeating, smoking, not exercising etc. Self-injury I think can be very apparent and sometiemes not. Today, our world is full of a lot of stress and people indulge in many ways that affect their health , income, and relationships with others. I think trying to love and respect yourself takes a long journey and improves with age due to life experieces and maturity. Self-injury is most frieghtening when one is sudicidal and strikes for immediate interevention and treatement. No one should be ashamed if they suffer from a mental illness, we all have weaknesses. I encourage anyone to seek help if they feel sudicial and not feel ashamed because depression is an imbance along with other mental illness.
Take care to everyone!

Hello Dr.John,
You were wary about posting. I was wary about reading. I asked myself is this going to influence me in a bad way. I decided that if I remember maybe I can read here, at least, when I am in the frame of mind to hurt myself. I have never injured myself because of something I have seen or read. I have only done so when I am extremely low, frustrated, disappointed & very angry with myself. I don't know about anyone else, but I don't think reading anything here should give me ideas--I hope.

http://self-injury.net/

This site was checked out and approved by the moderators. I hope it is useful to some.

Im so pleased that this thread exists,its so hard to find understanding about si/sh.I myself am 41yrs old and theres very few people ,that no i sh.I have kept this a secret most my life which has prevented me from seeking help,Im hoping that by talking with others who understand,will help me and others find positive ways of dealing with sh.

I'm also happy this thread exists....
I haven't felt the need to cut myself in a long time...
But I just got out of a bad relationship..
And the guy I was with, I thought he was the greatest thing ever.
I thought I loved him...
But then he started drifting away from me for no reason.
I got scared.
I tried to talk to him but it didn't help any...
I cry myself to sleep every night...
I can't cut myself because I promised him along time ago that I wouldn't...
I feel guilty when I try to...
And now, he's spreading rumors about me.
People look at me differently because he's saying that we messed around...
When he knows that I was raped and abused and that I'm scared of guys.
I thought I could trust him.
Guess I was proved wrong...
What's wrong with me?
I'm so messed up...
He caused me to start feeling depressed and I know he knows.
I've been different since we broke up...
And yet he doesn't seem to care...
He doesn't even try to talk to me anymore...
I don't know if I can handle this anymore...

. I started cutting a long time ago and never told anyone. After my mom passed when I was ten abuse became a way of life along with drinking drugs gambling and having an alcoholic brother who would literally try to kill us , espcially me since I was youngest. I didn't know it til recently for I thought repressed memories was something that happened in movies. I think for me I couldn't deal with the emotional abuse it seemed mire overwhelming than the physical abuse. And over the years when u would get sad or deppressed,rejected and alone. I found myself going back to hiding in my room as a child I didn't have my own room but I hid in the closet or under the bed. I wasn't allowed to eat,and when I got depressed I would get beat more from family members. Years later in recovery I find myself alone and isolated thinking I had it beat. But rejection,death and loneliness within the past few months seemed to have brought me,my mind to when I was a child and I started to cut to relieve the intense emotional pain. I'm not proud of it and ill admit feeling the blade and seeing the blood brought some relief emotionally. But I knew it would lead me to do something I tried to do in2002. For the cutting wasn't enough this time and I started drinking again after 7 years which not only made it as I cut I also felt like I deserved to be punished the way I was when I was 10+11 I came close toa overdosing again like I did in 2002 and nearly died for I hadn't told anyone. Just someone had a feeling I may have done something and called 911 and sent them to my apt. I told them I didn't do anything. Its a long story but I awoke in ICU after the overdose caused 2 seizures. I wasn't too happy with the person who sent ambulance to my apt. The hospital pharmacist had to know what I took along with the alcohol and when I told her what pills and how many she said that amount I should be dead 'someone up there wants you around longer'. Lately I've been asking why? No cutting isn't 'cool' but I do understand the emotional reason behind it though I don't encourage it. That's why a couple weeks ago I fought those feelings and walked to hospital and told them I'm in a crisis I need help. Now I'm taking things 1 minute at a time in hopes I could get back on track again.wow I write a lot,thank you for letting me share this and good luck to all who go through this,David